# Alaskan Dork Builds Flame Thrower Wielding Mecha in His Backyard **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 18, 2005, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444 "2005-01-18T22:42:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/21 "2005-01-19T17:49:04Z")
You really sure it’s wise to call him a dork? ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/22 "2005-01-19T18:07:10Z")
Take _that_, [Troy Hurtubise](http://www.improb.com/news/2002/may/troy-new-suit.html)! ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/23 "2005-01-19T19:23:38Z")
> [@](#): > > “Failure is not an option. I have no choice but to do this. If I don’t do it, I will explode.” I think he’s more likely to explode if he _does_ do this. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/24 "2005-01-19T19:50:16Z")
> [@audiobottle](#): > > I don’t know, if you tried to pet a kitten, you’d crush it. Drae want tiger-robot body!!! And speaking as a woman, I can say that chicks dig men with flame-throwing killer robots. _nod_ ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/25 "2005-01-19T20:15:35Z")
Another reason I love the Dope… ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/26 "2005-01-19T20:19:51Z")
I definitely need tickets to the next BattleBots competition. I _gots_ to see this. Of course, the 18ft MechWarrior will probably get defeated from some 20lb scoop-looking robot that will scoot underneath on of its legs, throw off its balance and cause it to fall over, thus forfeiting the competition. Being focused on nail guns and flamethrowers no doubt left this guy little time to give it the ability to stand up from a fall. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/27 "2005-01-19T20:44:35Z")
Wow. I never knew Megas XLR was a documentary. You can scoff at him, but who else will we trun to when the giant robot aliens invade. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/28 "2005-01-19T21:54:49Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > You really sure it’s wise to call him a dork? Meh, my Chrysler’s solid Detroit steel, so even if he could manage to catch me, there’s not a helluvlalot he could do to me. There’s no way that mech of his could carry enough fuel to be able to ignite the car, and the nails would bounce right off the body panels, so unless he managed to get a lucky shot through the windows and into me, all I’d have to do is keep moving until he ran out of gas or tripped over something. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/29 "2005-01-19T22:18:50Z")
If you’re in an arena he could blow out your tires AND CRUSH YOU LIKE A POP CAN! ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/30 "2005-01-19T22:31:07Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > If you’re in an arena he could blow out your tires AND CRUSH YOU LIKE A POP CAN! I’ll drive on the rims (I’ve done it before, not with that car, but with others.) as long as I don’t stop moving, I’ll be fine. (Not that I’d be stupid enough to get in an arena with him. I _always_ have an escape route mapped out.) ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/31 "2005-01-19T22:59:51Z")
:: passer-by pauses to speak silently at the viewer, then runs :: :: pause :: :: badly-synced voice with Japanese-Alaskan accent :: Look out! Mecha-Saurus this way comes! Please to run! ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/32 "2005-01-20T02:33:19Z")
The fun thing about this is that since he’s from Wasilla, he probably had all the parts just sitting around in his back yard covered with blue tarps. You have to see the place to appreciate the humor here. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/33 "2005-01-20T02:45:34Z")
> [@](#): > > “You’ve got to have flame-throwers!” he says. I think I’m in love. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/34 "2005-01-20T02:58:17Z")
Unless the nine-inch nails are a tribute to his favorite band, they’re really a waste of resources. None of the model building codes require more than 16d or 3 1/2" for framing, so Robo-Builder needs a clue by four. ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/35 "2005-01-20T03:31:57Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > Meh, my Chrysler’s solid Detroit steel, so even if he could manage to catch me, there’s not a helluvlalot he could do to me. There’s no way that mech of his could carry enough fuel to be able to ignite the car, and the nails would bounce right off the body panels, so unless he managed to get a lucky shot through the windows and into me, all I’d have to do is keep moving until he ran out of gas or tripped over something. 😃 How about equipping your Chrysler with tow cable and circle around him twice? ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/36 "2005-01-20T03:37:32Z")
I find this really depressing. Have I salvaged a car battery, gotten the necessary acids, and anodized myself some aluminum? Have I even started construction of a theremin? Where is my Jacob’s Ladder, with dial to adjust the speed? How long has my led walking stick needed repair? When was the last time I made any progress on the homemade ultralight? Am I any closer to suddenly dropping out of the sky and crumpling a major bone into a pretzel than I was a year ago? It seems like I haven’t accomplished anything as a mad scientist and junkyard warrior for a long time now. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/37 "2005-01-20T03:38:43Z")
> [@Yeticus Rex](#): > > How about equipping your Chrysler with tow cable and circle around him twice? I had the same thought about an hour after I posted last to this thread. [Kirk] Must be getting senile.[/Kirk] ---
**Author:** ![poeticyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/6bbea6/32.png) [@poeticyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/poeticyde)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/38 "2005-01-20T14:27:53Z")
I have to admit, there was a time in my life when I would have thought that was pretty freakin’ cool…but now that I’m older, and more mature, I wonder what else he could be doing with that talent and ingenuity. And I still think it’s pretty freakin’ cool! Alright, I’m a dork, I admit it. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/39 "2005-01-20T16:50:41Z")
I think I would mount the flame thrower at the crotch. ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/40 "2005-01-20T18:02:58Z")
What’s _wrong_ with you people? I, for one, would like to welcome our new Nail-Shooting, Flame-Throwing Alaskan Mecha Masters! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444.md?page=3)