# Alaskan Dork Builds Flame Thrower Wielding Mecha in His Backyard

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [January 18, 2005, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444 "2005-01-18T22:42:55Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Chairman\_Pow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/838e76/32.png) [@Chairman\_Pow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chairman_Pow)\
**Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/41 "2005-01-20T18:03:25Z")

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> [@matt\_mcl](#):
>
> You really sure it’s wise to call him a dork?

Depends on how far the spikes shoot.

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**Author:** ![The\_Wrong\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b782af/32.png) [@The\_Wrong\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Wrong_Girl)\
**Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/42 "2005-01-20T18:12:49Z")

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To me, the best thing about this article is the subheadline:  
“Machine may prove helpful by shooting nine-inch nails from the shoulders and 20-foot flames from forearms.”

Helpful when, exactly? When the mean other mechas are torturing animals or something? Helpful when you need a 20-foot flame thrower?

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**Author:** ![Chairman\_Pow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/838e76/32.png) [@Chairman\_Pow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chairman_Pow)\
**Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/43 "2005-01-20T18:20:16Z")

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> [@The Wrong Girl](#):
>
> Helpful when you need a 20-foot flame thrower?

Strictly speaking, yes.

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**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\
**Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/44 "2005-01-20T18:36:52Z")

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> [@Zebra](#):
>
> I think I would mount the flame thrower at the crotch.

Or out his backside. The best thing is that even when the flamethrower isn’t spewing, you’re still gonna look over at his and see a little pilot flame coming out his ass. We should all be so lucky.

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**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\
**Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/45 "2005-01-20T19:53:48Z")

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> [@The Wrong Girl](#):
>
> To me, the best thing about this article is the subheadline:  
> “Machine may prove helpful by shooting nine-inch nails from the shoulders and 20-foot flames from forearms.”
> 
> Helpful when, exactly? When the mean other mechas are torturing animals or something? Helpful when you need a 20-foot flame thrower?

You seriously underestimate the mecha’s power and the ability to shoot and cook your own meal out in the Alaskan wilderness in the safe confines of a steel frame amongst other [competing predators](http://www.outdoorlife.com/outdoor/hunting/biggame/article/0,19912,471417,00.html) …Muwwwhhhahhhahahahahaha!

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