# Aliens want your gametes **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 5, 2014, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695 "2014-11-05T02:04:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Onyerbike](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onyerbike/32/5402_2.png) [@Onyerbike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onyerbike)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/1 "2014-11-05T02:04:58Z")
Imagine if you will that a successful first contact has been made - all the right events unfold without a hitch. No nukes get thrown, no holy wars, no asteroids being dropped on our heads. It pretty much goes down like an episode of star trek except that it takes longer than half an hour. Maybe it takes ten years but eventually, we trust 'em enough to hand around in orbit. As a gesture of good will, they even begin setting our engineers and scientists on the right path to a number of our white whales, cold fusion, cure for aids, etc. It turns out that the aliens are a mostly humaniform collection of what we would call ‘different breeds’ living collectively in a vast society. Furthermore, they are not imperialistic at all and in fact are perfectly sanguine about our right to live on Earth in peace, even if they think we look funny and aren’t very smart. Powerful computers have made communication between the two species possible, and using such, they make it known to the world they wish to trade. Except of course, these are interstellar aliens who can travel the cosmos - they do not need iron ore or ham sandwiches. They do want one thing, however, and they are asking nicely for it. Our sperm and eggs. See the thing is these aliens view the discovery of a new sentient as a wonderful, precious gift to them. They are absolutely not willing to steal or coerce anything out of anyone, but very much make it known they have done this before with other species on other planets successfully. They wish for frozen gametes from both sexes. Using this material, they will essentially create a new type of being, half human half something else. The aliens will not deal with governments over an issue so important to them, preferring that individuals make the decision regarding the future of their own genes as most they can. The aliens further indicate that depending on our level of uh… collective enthusiasm, we have the chance to gain more knowledge from them, maybe even a proper alliance. Let’s say they ask you, and to put your mind at ease, they are willing to answer as best they can any of your questions, and be transparent throughout the whole thing… They are even willing to admit some visitation and parental rights, believing that to be in custom with humans at large (and increasing the chances of you saying yes). So - Do you say Yes/No? What questions or conditions have you on the aliens? Would you consider the hybrids to be your ‘children’, a ‘gift’ or ‘other’? ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/2 "2014-11-05T02:40:36Z")
How civilized are they? Have they figured out the end of racism? It sounds like it! Have they figured out the end of war? Have they figured out how to avoid ideological domination and extremism? Assuming they’re “better than we are” in most respects – and it sounds like they are – then, yeah, they can have all the sperm they want from me. I’m damn sure not using it. If they wanted to steal it, they’d find it easy enough anyway. They’re nice enough to ask? I’m all for it. Yeah, I’d like to make one or two conditions…but if they’re as civilized as they seem, they’d follow those conditions anyway. They aren’t gonna use human kids as cannon fodder in their wars, or make them into sex slaves. They’ll raise the kids to the height of their potential – higher, perhaps, something beyond any ordinary human potential. I’d like to request that the kids be taught where they came from. Remember Old Earth and the civilization that we fought so hard to create. But, again, I think the aliens would arrange that anyway. The kids, if they retain anything of humanity, would wonder. Why would the aliens lie, or conceal anything? It sounds great. Hold the jar steady, and I’ll give you a sample. ETA: forgot to answer your last question. I would consider the children to be “Earth’s Children,” not mine. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/3 "2014-11-05T02:47:32Z")
> [@Onyerbike](#): > > What questions or conditions have you on the aliens? Would you consider the hybrids to be your ‘children’, a ‘gift’ or ‘other’? [ul] [li]Foreplay; details to follow.[/li][li]Other. Really other.[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/4 "2014-11-05T03:12:13Z")
Rishathra, baby. Honestly, I don’t think I’d have a problem. Not like I own my DNA, it’s just a loaner for one lifetime’s worth. I might hold out for some interstellar tourism. But that’s just self-indulgent. ---
**Author:** ![Onyerbike](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onyerbike/32/5402_2.png) [@Onyerbike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onyerbike)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/5 "2014-11-05T03:28:38Z")
[QUOTE=Jonathan Chance] Not like I own my DNA [/quote] Woah cut straight to my point already, will ya? Why don’t we own our DNA? I would have said that Jonathan Chance does own his DNA by virtue of the fact that he is the only person in the world who has it, and can decide when and where it propagates further. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/6 "2014-11-05T03:31:02Z")
Ooh! That really gets my zygote! ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/7 "2014-11-05T04:05:59Z")
> [@Onyerbike](#): > > Woah cut straight to my point already, will ya? Why don’t we own our DNA? I would have said that Jonathan Chance does own his DNA by virtue of the fact that he is the only person in the world who has it, and can decide when and where it propagates further. No one else has exactly my DNA…but nearly everyone else on earth shares 99.99% of it. (More?) That’s one of the problems here: I can’t give away “my” DNA without also giving away huge chunks of yours. But most of us would hold that an individual does have personal property rights in “his” DNA. Unless someone had a specific mutation that was absolutely individual, I’m opposed to the idea of anyone “patenting” or copyrighting their DNA. I’d be outraged if someone sued to prevent me from giving away my sperm cells, on the grounds that I’m also giving away pretty much all the information in theirs…but, really, that’s what would be happening. (I fondly remember a lawsuit where a woman sued a men’s magazine for infringing on her privacy, because, if they print pictures of Miss September’s private parts, now everyone knows what the plaintiff’s private parts look like also. A picture of anyone’s genitals gives away the game for everyone. Obviously, the case was dismissed, as there are enough individual differences, but the point isn’t entirely insane. The cat – so to speak – was out of the bag long ago, when Greek and Roman painters and sculptors produced nudes.) ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/8 "2014-11-05T04:38:57Z")
What’s in it for me? Seriously, we can do business here, but I want something out of the deal. Besides the holodeck time that will be used to deliver the product, of course… ---
**Author:** ![Omega\_Glory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/7c8e57/32.png) [@Omega\_Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omega_Glory)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/9 "2014-11-05T04:51:10Z")
No. I’m not possessive of my DNA and would be willing to donate samples for studies, but I wouldn’t even willingly let human strangers have my child. To address the alien twist, I’d consider it if I could keep the child and if it turned out that there were immense benefits to being a hybrid. ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/10 "2014-11-05T05:52:24Z")
If aliens can travel between stars and visit other planets then they can surely probe me anytime they want and take anything they want… and I probably wouldn’t even know. For that matter, I’m sure aliens could extract and clone my DNA from hair or skin samples, etc. The fact that they’re asking makes me think they’re halfway decent beings and I might as well give them what they’re clearly capable of taking regardless. ---
**Author:** ![Weedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/weedy/32/301_2.png) [@Weedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weedy)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/11 "2014-11-05T10:17:56Z")
No. I wouldn’t want a child of mine being experimented on by aliens, no matter how powerful and well-meaning. ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/12 "2014-11-05T10:20:47Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > [ul] > [li]Foreplay; details to follow.[/li][li] **Other. Really other**.[/li][/ul] Icwutudidthar 😃 I’d say absolutely. Especially if it involves xenophilia. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/13 "2014-11-05T12:27:57Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > Icwutudidthar > > 😃 > > I’d say absolutely. Especially if it involves xenophilia. Oooh, that ain’t right. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/14 "2014-11-05T12:41:45Z")
Really…? If they can fly their rocket ship through the Holland Tunnel like Abbott & Costello, what happens between them and “the girls” they meet is their business. [Costello Wolf Whistle] “I’m a Ba-aaad Tour Guide…” [/Costello Wolf Whistle] ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/15 "2014-11-05T12:52:58Z")
I recall an episode of Next Generation where there was a colony whose members were all clones. For various technobabble reasons, they were unable to continue using their existing clones. So, they stole DNA from Riker, Troi, and several other senior officers. When this was discovered, the involuntary donors were all seriously pissed off and demanded the destruction of their stolen genes. The implication was that the colony would be foreced to start reproducing the old-fashioned way, and that this was a Good Thing. This always seemed both (a) inconsistent with the Prime Directive, and (b) silly. Had the colonists merely asked the crew of the Enterprise, over a thousand men and women, they would surely have at least a hundred people who would figure, “Hey, it’s not like we’re ever coming back here,” and voluntarily permit cloning. ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/16 "2014-11-05T12:58:26Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Oooh, that ain’t right. What, you wouldn’t bang Gaila? ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/17 "2014-11-05T13:56:07Z")
The heck with the product, let’s cut straight to the source: I’d give them my left nut for a cure for diabetes. The right one, a cure for cancer. Bring it, space-travelling scientists… ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/18 "2014-11-05T14:43:42Z")
Bring on the hot green women! ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aliens-want-your-gametes/703695/19 "2014-11-06T14:24:44Z")
Assuming they can painlessly remove them from my no-longer-connected testes, they’re welcome to all the sperm cells they can take. I’m assuming I’ll not be on the hook for any child support, though. This is no different than being a human sperm donor, IMO.