# all about dildos! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 15, 2001, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501 "2001-11-15T08:29:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/61 "2001-11-16T17:45:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Glen Livid \* > Perhaps i will get her that 15" long, 4" thick one they had hanging on the wall. I hope she’s ambitious. :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: You’d get closer to me with the model that Anthony Perkins used _Crimes of Passion_ than you would with the one quoted above 😛 ---
**Author:** ![grayhairedmomma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/47e85d/32.png) [@grayhairedmomma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grayhairedmomma)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/62 "2001-11-16T18:04:20Z")
> [@](#): > > I’m just all about watching my g-friend have orgasms…I like giving her 5 or 6 before i even penetrate her…I think that adding a toy into the mix could make this more fun for me, more fun for her, and change things up a little. This is a great attitude but remember - don’t get so caught up in the mechanics of using the thing that it isn’t fun anymore. Also - don’t use it all the time, it can detract from the intimacy in your lovemaking. > [@](#): > > damn…looks like i chose poorly, then…shoulda gotten something soft and textured i suppose. I guess it’s what I get for being a first time buyer. I just recently bought my first sex toys. A silicone vibrating dildo with little bumps all over it and a remote control vibrating egg thing with a wiggly little “finger” on the end. I’m not really into using these by myself so my partner and I have incorporated these into our activities. **Lessons learned:** 1. The next dildo needs to be shaped more like a real penis. The tip on this one is pointed and it is really uncomfortable if inserted to far - which is harder to control than you might think when you’re first learning. 2. Internal vibration is WAY overrated (for me anyway). I do not like that sensation at all. 3. I don’t like the egg inside but it is heaven when used as a clit stimulator. Whoa baby! **Glen Livid** - I think your best bet would be to make the selection with your girlfriend. Maybe attend an adult toy show in your area so that you can actually handle them before purchasing. Spend the money and go with something more natural it’ll be more comfortable! Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![BottledBlondJeanie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/0ea827/32.png) [@BottledBlondJeanie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BottledBlondJeanie)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/63 "2001-11-16T21:41:11Z")
Vibrators and Dildos and Anal Beads–Oh MY! I have a tool box at home. Really, a tool box–stainless steel and it locks. I mean–what if I died or was injured and my parents came to my house!? My personal fav is my Black Knight. It has a rotating head, vibrating action and has a branch with some sort of animal flicking it’s tongue–works only when vibrating. I believe it also comes in a white knight version, but…the black just seemed more suited for a Giant dildo (in an evil bad symbolic way–not a stereotypical way) My second fav is Leroy. He’s purple with a “vibrating beaver tongue branch” Jellies are ALWAYS nice… Butt (pun intended) beads are great. My Thai Jelly Love Beads are AWESOME. My first response to them was–GROSS why would somone want something up their butt while having sex? My second response (several minutes later) was OOOOOOOOOOOOGODOMYGODOMYGODOMYEVERLOVINGJESUS!!! ---
**Author:** ![BottledBlondJeanie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/0ea827/32.png) [@BottledBlondJeanie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BottledBlondJeanie)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/64 "2001-11-16T21:42:17Z")
Vibrators and Dildos and Anal Beads–Oh MY! I have a tool box at home. Really, a tool box–stainless steel and it locks. I mean–what if I died or was injured and my parents came to my house!? My personal fav is my Black Knight. It has a rotating head, vibrating action and has a branch with some sort of animal flicking its tongue–works only when vibrating. I believe it also comes in a white knight version, but…the black just seemed more suited for a Giant dildo (in an evil bad symbolic way–not a stereotypical way) My second fav is Leroy. He’s purple with a “vibrating beaver tongue branch” Jellies are ALWAYS nice… Butt (pun intended) beads are great. My Thai Jelly Love Beads are AWESOME. My first response to them was–GROSS why would somone want something up their butt while having sex? My second response (several minutes later) was OOOOOOOOOOOOGODOMYGODOMYGODOMYEVERLOVINGJESUS!!! ---
**Author:** ![Venoma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@Venoma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Venoma)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/65 "2001-11-16T21:55:21Z")
Bless you, Jeanie, you’ve just given me the perfect spot to hide my accoutrements… when I finally get around to picking them up/ordering 😉 (You NAME them? wow. So what did the landlord think of Leroy, again?) ---
**Author:** ![BottledBlondJeanie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/0ea827/32.png) [@BottledBlondJeanie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BottledBlondJeanie)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/66 "2001-11-16T22:16:42Z")
😛 My comforter was moved over Leroy and Letters when I got home. I think the apartment will not be shown to ANYONE until I move out. I suppose I should be ashamed 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/67 "2001-11-17T01:03:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mighty\_Girl \* > \*\* > I don’t think that it is a substitute for a man, it is like a cherry on the topping. \*\* Or a topping on the cherry… ---
**Author:** ![KimKatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@KimKatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KimKatt)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/68 "2001-11-17T01:38:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by BottledBlondJeanie \* > \*\*I have a tool box at home. Really, a tool box–stainless steel and it locks. I mean–what if I died or was injured and my parents came to my house!? > \*\* Oh my goodness, I thought I was the only one. We have a large MasterCraft toolbox, one of the three-rack inside jobs, with a large padlock. Hey, we’ve got kids; I’m pretty open minded, and I’ll answer any questions they ask, but no use inviting trouble. I can see it now, as **Shirley** said earlier: Thanksgiving dinner, the family gathering at the table, and one of the kiddies wandering into the room trailing my vibrating nipple clamps, saying, “Hey, Mom, what’re these for?” By the way, as I was very recently reminded, (this is like major deja vu of the common definition of it), we did the vibrator thread some time ago. Do a search in MPSIMS on Vibrator and Efficacy, 18 months back. You’ll find it. Now, having said all that: Starter model - go for the Silver Bullet/Vibrating Eggs type toy. They’re great to start with. Small, non-threatening :), very versatile, a wonderful addition to any sex toy collection. Personal opinion based on a fairly considerable amount of experience. ---
**Author:** ![porcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ac91a4/32.png) [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/69 "2001-11-17T02:05:43Z")
Since I started the thread, here’s the link: [BZZZZZZZZ… Efficacy of Vibrators](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=38339) ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/70 "2001-11-17T03:08:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KimKatt \* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by BottledBlondJeanie \* > > I have a tool box at home. Really, a tool box–stainless steel and it locks. I mean–what if I died or was injured and my parents came to my house!? > > Oh my goodness, I thought I was the only one. > > We have a large MasterCraft toolbox, one of the three-rack inside jobs, with a large padlock. Wow … I’m liking not having kids even more now 😉 I just keep all my toys in a suitcase. I call it the **Suitcase of Looooove** ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/71 "2001-11-17T03:54:54Z")
> [@](#): > > The issue is that my g-friend has a latex allergy. I really wanted a stainless steel vibrator, because it seems like the most sanitary option…but i couldn’t find a good one. As I noted in the Magnum Condom hread, you could use the **Avanti** polyurethane condom – cover the latex item with one of these and you eed not worry about laex sensitivity. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/72 "2001-11-17T20:10:09Z")
Jeez, **CalMeacham**! You could fit a Magnum-sized dildo of any material into that giant space in your sig! Cut it down, willya? ---
**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/73 "2001-11-17T20:34:05Z")
Thank you all so much. I’ve sat here at work laughing so hard that I’m crying. All I can see is this guy giving his g-friend a stainless steel vibrator, hey, put a chain saw motor on it and that should do the trick. There there’s jarbabyj on her water faucet grinding away. Can you see the girls with the vibrating panties riding the bus and everyone looking around at what that buzzing noise is? or why they seem to be weaving back and forth in a pattern??? I know, it’s a little over the line but so easy to picture after reading these posts. Yea, it would be my luck for my dog to find mine (if I had one) and come running out with it at the family Christmas get-together. I guess the first question would be, “Who gets that present” or worse yet the dog (male) starts humping somebody’s leg with this dildo hung out his mouth. ---
**Author:** ![KellyM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/57b2e6/32.png) [@KellyM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KellyM)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2001, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/74 "2001-11-18T00:28:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > \*\*And I never do. > > I wish I had a dildo. > > My dog would probably eat it.\*\* This is so close to being a perfectly wonderful haiku. You just have to strike “probably”. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![tronvillain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@tronvillain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tronvillain)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2001, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/75 "2001-11-18T14:17:10Z")
I’m male, but I’ve always been the one to introduce toys to the relationship. It’s true that decent ones are expensive, but you really do get what you pay for, especially if you’re shopping in the right place (the place I go to specializes in silicone - no rubber, no real skin, some plastic in the case of vibrators). ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2018, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/77 "2018-02-28T08:12:25Z")
Zombie-action. Oldie but a goldie! ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2018, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-dildos/93501/78 "2018-02-28T14:59:26Z")
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