# All about feeders - and I don't mean bird feeders **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2006, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692 "2006-04-14T19:31:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/1 "2006-04-14T19:31:36Z")
Googling for bird feeders yielded this little tidbit. [Feeders](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feederism) > [@](#): > > In a heterosexual situation, the feeder helps or encourages the feedee to gain weight. The feedee is usually the woman since this sub-fetish is usually male dominated. In the homosexual situation, the encourager encourages the gainer to gain weight. In either situation, the goals and results are usually the same. Often times there is a set goal weight. The act of reaching the goal is also itself a fetish, resulting in sex. Feederism also tends to center around the pleasure of food and consuming large amounts of it. Such a situation is certainly not medically advisable. If not kept in check by natural or active means, doing this will result in the feedee eventually becoming too heavy to walk. At this point, the feedee is completely dependent on the feeder for food, water, and hygiene and the feeder is often cut off from family and friends. If the feeder becomes abusive, the feedee cannot leave the relationship due to their physical immobility. Most importantly, the weight at which someone is immobile is typically life-threatening. Despite the risks involved, when immobility is reached, it is often the penultimate fetish in the hierarchy and most pleasurable. However, most people are not willing to risk their lives and in such a case it is difficult to reach such a weight. [Fat Girls and Feeders](http://www.pervscan.com/2004/04/21/fat-girls-and-feeders/) > [@](#): > > Female Fat is pure SEX to me - I love huge overlapping aprons and undulating rolls of stretch marked shocking flaccid slop. Side show exhibitionist fat girl freaks who love to show off their sexual mountains of fat are my favorite people. My wife is currently over 900 pound. I would have to be 2 feet long to penetrate her. The last time we had “that kind” of sex was 4 years ago when she was 750 pounds. I love sex with her now even more, sinking deep into her flabby folds of overlapping fat gives me the biggest orgasms I have ever had. Watching her compulsively eat herself even fatter is the most thrilling part of my life. I love her growing fat, every new pound of her flab gets me even more excited. ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/2 "2006-04-14T19:34:18Z")
OK, where’s the Human Resources office for the Human Race? I want to resign. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/3 "2006-04-14T19:36:28Z")
Thanks for sharing that “tidbit” EECCCHHHHHH!!! ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/4 "2006-04-14T19:38:32Z")
Ew! ---
**Author:** ![Marathon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7cd45c/32.png) [@Marathon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marathon)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/5 "2006-04-14T19:56:54Z")
> [@](#): > > undulating rolls of stretch marked shocking flaccid slop. My. What a way with words. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/6 "2006-04-14T20:03:18Z")
_This_ looks like a job for…_ **Brain Bleach Man!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/7 "2006-04-14T20:04:57Z")
Would that guy qualify for a Darwin Award? If he can’t have ‘that kind’ of sex with her, is he out of the gene pool? ---
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/8 "2006-04-14T20:06:29Z")
Man, I feel… I feel… What is the opposite of aroused? ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/9 "2006-04-14T20:10:25Z")
You have to wonder where the women stand in this whole thing. It’s clearly a control thing from the male perspective (make 'er huge, she’s all yours-- hell, she can’t even move). Do the women actually feel special? Loved? In any type of control? I’ll admit, I don’t get most “weird” fetishes, but this really just. . . wow. ---
**Author:** ![Sal\_Ammoniac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Sal\_Ammoniac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sal_Ammoniac)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/10 "2006-04-14T20:29:25Z")
I admit I’m sort of curious as to how he knows she’s “900 pound.” He’s probably exaggerating and she’s not a hair over 850. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/11 "2006-04-14T22:07:35Z")
I’m a bit :dubious: over the 900 pounds bit. Seriously, I deal with people who are over 400 pounds fairly often (and hospitalized–what a shocker that is!). I have heard that there are men who are into uber-Reubenesque women, but this is a tad ridiculous. I think there’s some exaggerating going on here. And I just put back the marshmallow chocolate eggs I was going to eat…I have recently lost about 5 pounds–I think I’ll keep going with that. (we really need a puking smiley, truly) ---
**Author:** ![Sierra\_Indigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Sierra\_Indigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sierra_Indigo)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/12 "2006-04-14T22:17:49Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > You have to wonder where the women stand in this whole thing. It’s clearly a control thing from the male perspective (make 'er huge, she’s all yours-- hell, she can’t even move). Do the women actually feel special? Loved? In any type of control? > > I’ll admit, I don’t get most “weird” fetishes, but this really just. . . wow. Feedees often claim to feel loved, and special. After all, they have someone catering to their every whim - feeding them on demand, waiting on them hand and foot when they become too morbidly obese to move, becoming more sexually aroused with every pound that they gain. ---
**Author:** ![JohnBckWLD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JohnBckWLD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnBckWLD)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/13 "2006-04-14T22:19:27Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > I’ll admit, I don’t get most “weird” fetishes, but this really just. . . wow. The feeder fetish is weird, but doesn’t come close to those guys who hang their junk in a jar of wasps, shake it around a bit and get stung so much they’re transformed into elephantitis groin. What would make it a really sick, XXXL fetish is if the men were German canniibals, and were force feeding their women with the hopes of getting a type of inexpensive foie gras you can’t find in any market. ---
**Author:** ![Sierra\_Indigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Sierra\_Indigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sierra_Indigo)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/14 "2006-04-14T22:24:00Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > I have heard that there are men who are into uber-Reubenesque women, but this is a tad ridiculous. I think there’s some exaggerating going on here. (Sorry for doublepost, didn’t see **eneanorigby** ’s post when I replied). I won’t link, because almost everything about this fetish is not safe for work, but I assure you there’s little to no exaggeration going on here - google search ‘feedees’, ‘bigcuties’, ‘fantasyfeeder’, ‘gaininggoddess’ and so forth if you really, really want to know. Feeders want their partner as large as they can have them. Often the words “too fat to move” are thrown around. Feedees want to be as large as they can, and they’re often constantly striving to add more and more weight. I don’t know if the 900lb goal is achieveable, but there’s certainly feedees out there (most commonly women) who are more than three or four hundred pounds overweight, and still climbing. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/15 "2006-04-14T22:25:17Z")
> [@JohnBckWLD](#): > > \*The feeder fetish is weird, but doesn’t come close to those guys who hang their junk in a jar of wasps, shake it around a bit and get stung so much they’re transformed into elephantitis groin. \* > > What would make it a really sick, XXXL fetish is if the men were German canniibals, and were force feeding their women with the hopes of getting a type of inexpensive foie gras you can’t find in any market. Emphasis mine-- yeah, I’d say this is actually worse. They are killing the person they “love”. There is no way a person can live very well, or hell, at all, far above 350 lbs (let alone 600, 700, 800, and 900 lbs). But you know what’s sad about the second thing you said? I’m sure someone, somewhere is doing it. Hell, there’s probably whole message boards on the topic. : shiver : ---
**Author:** ![Sierra\_Indigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Sierra\_Indigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sierra_Indigo)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/16 "2006-04-14T22:27:57Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > But you know what’s sad about the second thing you said? I’m sure someone, somewhere is doing it. Hell, there’s probably whole message boards on the topic. : shiver : And somewhere on the internet, someone is masturbating to it… 😃 I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/17 "2006-04-14T22:31:08Z")
Oh, god. I want to vomit at the thought. Sorry, I try to be opened minded and all but this is just so… Query: how do fetishes start, anyway? I can see how someone who was beaten as a kid could somehow transmogrify that into arousal and then need some kind of pain to get off–that seems linear to me (twisted, but linear), how does one know that one has a fat fetish? Call me ignorant (thanks!) but how does one ever learn that one has a stick my member in a wasp filled jar and let’s see what happens schtick? I don’t get it-any of it. Maybe I’m missing out on some great sexual experience that I would strive to repeat again and again, but I doubt it. So, how do you know you have a fetish like this? Sorry for (tangential) hijack ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/18 "2006-04-14T22:42:51Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > Oh, god. I want to vomit at the thought. Sorry, I try to be opened minded and all but this is just so… > Query: how do fetishes start, anyway? I can see how someone who was beaten as a kid could somehow transmogrify that into arousal and then need some kind of pain to get off–that seems linear to me (twisted, but linear), how does one know that one has a fat fetish? > > Call me ignorant (thanks!) but how does one ever learn that one has a stick my member in a wasp filled jar and let’s see what happens schtick? > > I don’t get it-any of it. Maybe I’m missing out on some great sexual experience that I would strive to repeat again and again, but I doubt it. So, how do you know you have a fetish like this? > > Sorry for (tangential) hijack Even that isn’t always true. I know several people who were never spanked as kids or anything like that, but have pain/pleasure fetishes. ---
**Author:** ![Sierra\_Indigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Sierra\_Indigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sierra_Indigo)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/19 "2006-04-14T22:58:49Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > Oh, god. I want to vomit at the thought. Sorry, I try to be opened minded and all but this is just so… > Query: how do fetishes start, anyway? I can see how someone who was beaten as a kid could somehow transmogrify that into arousal and then need some kind of pain to get off–that seems linear to me (twisted, but linear), how does one know that one has a fat fetish? > > Call me ignorant (thanks!) but how does one ever learn that one has a stick my member in a wasp filled jar and let’s see what happens schtick? > > I don’t get it-any of it. Maybe I’m missing out on some great sexual experience that I would strive to repeat again and again, but I doubt it. So, how do you know you have a fetish like this? > > Sorry for (tangential) hijack Some fetishes will start due to things like childhood issues/trauma, that’s a given. But as with anything to do with the human brain/psyche, there’s a lot people just don’t understand. Some people who were beaten as kids become pain sluts, needing spanking and whipping and bondage to get off. Some who were beaten as kids become averse to any sort of pain, and have the most vanilla sex ever imaginable. Anecdotally, I was never beaten as a kid, though I was spanked on a few (very irregular) occasions. I don’t need pain to get off, but hairpulling, biting, spanking and flogging all rate very high on my ‘wet panties’ scale. I don’t know where that came from, or why, but there it is. Some feedees had(have) terrible self confidence. Often they’re already somewhat overweight. They’ve had trouble with relationships because of their size, and when they finally hook up with a feeder/fat fetishist, they suddenly become the object of someone’s desire - what they’ve been craving for however long. They’ll do anything to keep their lover, and if that includes eating themselves into an early grave then they’ll do it. Why? Because even if they die young, they’ll die believing they were loved. Of course, some feedees are the opposite. They’re confident in their fatness, andadore the attention/worship of their feeder for the reasons I mentioned before - they’re being worshipped by someone. Food is brought to them, they need someone to wash and toilet them, to bring them everything they need. It’s a very, very potent power trip. They’re rarer than the first breed of feedee, but they’re still out there. Often they’re the ones on the BBW fetish sites like ‘bigcuties’ and ‘fantasyfeeder’. Feeders are the same. Some are terribly low in self confidence, and find it fulfilling to spend their life waiting on/worshipping someone who can’t get away/find someone else. Others are terribly controlling, and get off on the idea of hobbling their loved one to the point where they couldn’t leave even if they wanted to. Sticking your weiner in a jar of wasps, however? Not sure where you get that one from. But you can make a guess - some people would have done it because they were bored/drunk/crazy/kinked out and needed something else to try. Others would do it because someone has told them to, or because they’ve seen someone else espousing the awesomeness of the act and they don’t want to be left behind. If you’re happy with what most kinksters would term ‘vanilla’ sex, you really shouldn’t beat yourself up just because there’s others out there who like it kinky-stylie. You’re not wrong because you don’t get it. There’s some things out there that people are doing that just don’t make sense in the harsh light of day outside the boudoir. Diff’rent strokes for diff’rent folks and all that. If what you do gets you going, that’s all that matters. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2006, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692/20 "2006-04-14T23:16:31Z")
> [@Amp](#): > > Man, I feel… I feel… What is the opposite of aroused? Pope-a-riffic? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-about-feeders-and-i-dont-mean-bird-feeders/352692.md?page=2)