# All but one of Roald Dahl's works of fiction to be removed from history. Which one? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 20, 2012, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782 "2012-06-20T20:42:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/1 "2012-06-20T20:42:28Z")
For reasons that may be summarized as me being a petty jackass, I have decided to reduce the level of beauty and joy in the world yet again. This time I’ll be hopping in the continua buggy and … oh, let’s just say _persuading_ Roald Dahl to restrict his writing to intelligence reports. So once I’m done there’ll be no more _Matilda_, no _Charlie & the Chocolate Factor_, no _James & the Giant Peach_; no more _Sometime Never_ or _My Uncle Oswald_. Even the short stories will be gone. By this time next Tuesday, none of you will ever remember loving anything he wrote. With one exception, that is. I’ll be arranging for one–JUST one–of his tales–to survive. Y’all get to choose. You can pick any single novel, or any collection of short stories published before his death. What will you choose, and why? ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/2 "2012-06-20T20:48:35Z")
James and the Giant Peach. Please. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/3 "2012-06-20T20:49:32Z")
Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator. Because it would confuse people. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/4 "2012-06-20T20:50:01Z")
> [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](#): > > James and the Giant Peach. Please. I need a reason, cat-maiden. And “we have the same middle name” doesn’t count. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/5 "2012-06-20T20:52:15Z")
The answer should be obvious: “Lamb to the Slaughter.” And _please_ make sure you save the Hitchcock version starring Barbara Bel Geddes! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/6 "2012-06-20T20:53:01Z")
\*Danny the Champion of the World \*was the first “real” book I ever read by myself, from beginning to end. So I’ll go with that. If I had to choose his best, though, it would be _Charlie and the Chocolate Factory_. It warped my mind in all the right ways. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/7 "2012-06-20T20:53:24Z")
Nothing. Tabula rasa. Think of how many different, amazing stories he would write if he had another career’s worth of writing to do instead. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/8 "2012-06-20T20:54:45Z")
Boy. Dahl’s memoir of his childhood is more fantastic than all his fiction put together. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/9 "2012-06-20T20:55:50Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Nothing. Tabula rasa. Think of how many different, amazing stories he would write if he had another career’s worth of writing to do instead. I think you read a different OP than I wrote. > [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > Boy. Dahl’s memoir of his childhood is more fantastic than all his fiction put together. Silly rabbit. I was only planning on keeping him from writing _fiction_. Now that you’ve reminded me of that, you’ve placed it in danger as well. ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/10 "2012-06-20T21:00:59Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Silly rabbit. I was only planning on keeping him from writing _fiction_. Now that you’ve reminded me of that, you’ve placed it in danger as well. I can’t help but wonder how much of that _is_ fiction. ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/11 "2012-06-20T21:03:29Z")
Oh gosh, you couldn’t persuade him to remove _all_ of them? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/12 "2012-06-20T21:03:56Z")
You don’t want to do that. You can eliminate them going into the future, but you can’t go back in the past - it will cause tens of thousands of people to possibly live in agony. After her stroke, while carrying their fifth child, Dahl’s wife, actress Patricia Neal dedicated the Patricia Neal Center for Rehabilitation in Knoxville, TN, which has, since 1978, helped many people cope with the after-affects of stroke, spinal cord, and other like injuries to the central nervous system. One of which was my dad. So… in a stroke of good fortune, I thwart your evil plan… but barely. All his books will be expunged _in the future_. ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/13 "2012-06-20T21:14:35Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > You don’t want to do that. I suspect that **delphica** may be referring to teeth. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/14 "2012-06-20T21:18:54Z")
Actually, I was responding to the OP… sorry if that wasn’t clear, about 10 posts popped up between me starting to write my response and the actual posting of it. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/15 "2012-06-20T21:21:38Z")
Y’know, his first published work was actually nonfiction. Only Dahl could make an account of suffering horrible burns over most of his body while crashing a fighter plane so hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/16 "2012-06-20T21:29:01Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > Actually, I was responding to the OP… sorry if that wasn’t clear, about 10 posts popped up between me starting to write my response and the actual posting of it. Ahh—gotcha. 🙂 I was just making a dumb joke anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/17 "2012-06-20T21:35:08Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I need a reason, cat-maiden. And “we have the same middle name” doesn’t count. It’s my favorite, the one that I’ve read and reread the most. It has awesome songs, second only to CatGGE (my second choice, but it doesn’t stand as well on its own as JatGP). ---
**Author:** ![Agent\_Foxtrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Agent\_Foxtrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agent_Foxtrot)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/18 "2012-06-20T21:36:01Z")
Please, _My Uncle Oswald_! Forget that it doesn’t even hold a candle to the brilliance and wonderful storytelling of _The Visitor_ (my favorite short story ever), but I wouldn’t even regard it as anything better than pornography. I know Dahl was a freak and a pervert, but this “book” was just over the top. What a letdown it was. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/19 "2012-06-20T22:28:16Z")
As long as his screenplays for\* Chitty Chitty Bang-Bang \*and \*You Only Live Twice \*are gone, I don’t care. ---
**Author:** ![Tapiotar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3be4f8/32.png) [@Tapiotar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapiotar)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2012, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782/20 "2012-06-20T22:58:31Z")
The collected short stories must survive. I don’t care about kid’s books, but I love the darker short stories with a touch of the macabre, many of which I read for the first time in Alfred Hitchcock anthologies. The above-mentioned “Lamb to the Slaughter”, “The Sound Machine”, “Royal Jelly”…oh, dang, I have to go out and get me some Roald Dahl and hide the works safely away, before it’s too late… [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-but-one-of-roald-dahls-works-of-fiction-to-be-removed-from-history-which-one/625782.md?page=2)