# All Crushes Accepted Here!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-crushes-accepted-here/16252>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [April 20, 2000, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-crushes-accepted-here/16252 "2000-04-20T07:44:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 1

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\
**Post date:** [April 20, 2000, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-crushes-accepted-here/16252/1 "2000-04-20T07:44:00Z")

</div>

In return for your declaration of a crush on yours truly, I will offer one of these fine gifts:

A personalized Thank You note  
A trip to Bermuda  
or…  
A NEW CAR!!!

Please feel free to leave your mash notes here.

(notallgiftswillbedistributedIreservertherighttovoidcancelorotherwisenullifythiscontestatanytimerenderingyouimmutablycrushedonmewithoutadamnthingyoucandoaboutitvoidwhereprohibited$ 0.01depotrefundinthailand)

* * *

The more I teaches you, the dumber you gets.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\
**Post date:** [April 20, 2000, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-crushes-accepted-here/16252/2 "2000-04-20T08:58:00Z")

</div>

Here’s a mash note for you:

**Not all of us have 52" monitors!**

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Anti\_Pro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Anti\_Pro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anti_Pro)\
**Post date:** [April 22, 2000, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-crushes-accepted-here/16252/3 "2000-04-22T03:40:00Z")

</div>

[indignant] Who told you I had a crush on ‘yours truly’!? [/indignant] I categorically deny it. I \* did have \* one on John Larrigan, and then he turned out to be about ten years old, making ME, just an old letch!

pluto is a cutie, but then he has three plutinos, AND they are sick, I mean \* how sick would I have to be \* to continue with THAT crush?

ChiefScott, ohhh, a guy in a uniform, yummy! But, GirlbytheSea is just \* too sweet \* to continue in the particular vein.

Okay, Mr. Cynical, how old are you?? You are VERY humorous, which is a total turn on, but if you turn out to be around 25, I don’t think I can handle the rejection, or being arrested for having another crush on jailbait!

## Before I give up ‘yours truly’ (who I still deny having a crush on at all, BTW) I want licenses, birth certificates, passports, or your Sam’s Club card!

“I never saw so many words compressed into so small an idea.” Abraham Lincoln