# All Hail Queen Tatertot. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 3, 2000, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536 "2000-11-03T09:48:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/1 "2000-11-03T09:48:52Z")
We all love her. She constantly cracks me up with her bubbley personality. She’s a bit of a babe to boot. I say that she should be Queen of MPSIMS for the day. So all you anti-royalists forget about your politics and fall on your knees and Hail the real Queen of Hearts. So what say ya all. Not that it matters as she and I have already made the decision 😉 ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/2 "2000-11-03T09:52:09Z")
Although I am concerned about just being a “bit” of a babe…dangit, I knew I should have showed more skin in Dublin. Now all I need is a King…any takers? ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/3 "2000-11-03T09:56:17Z")
Yup! If anyone diserves to be a queen for a day, its her!! All Hail Queen Tatertot! Klaatu Barada Nikto! ---
**Author:** ![Spiny\_Norman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Spiny\_Norman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiny_Norman)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/4 "2000-11-03T10:39:58Z")
\ All Hail Queen Tatertot. May her reign be long & prosperous! Tater - ehm, your Majesty - you don’t want a king, really. What you’re looking for is a Prince Consort - one who’ll take your orders and walk three steps behind your left heel at official events. Judging by the examples I’ve seen, an amusing accent is also part of the job requirements. Too bad you let your bitch get away… Of course, if ou were to throw in a knighthood or suchlike, perhaps one of your loyal subjects might step in. \ ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/5 "2000-11-03T11:05:18Z")
_enter the Dutch Prince_ Hail thee, Oh Queen Tot of Tater! Ahem… how YOU doin’, babe? Now, show us some skin, dammit. I normally only bow to Queen Beatrix, so this better be good 😛 ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/6 "2000-11-03T11:08:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > I normally only bow to **Queen Beatrix** , so this better be good 😛 When I read this, I had to double check to make sure it didn’t say Dominatrix… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/7 "2000-11-03T11:22:59Z")
Oooh, Prince Consort, that’s a fab idea **Snormy**. I’m a woman of the 00s, no need to share my power with anybody. In gratitude, I’m going to make you Duke of IMHO. 😃 **Coldy** - come meet me and **Snormy** in Hamburg on the 18th and I’ll show you some skin, baby. Remember how much I drank at **Yoji’s** , just give me one more than that and I’ll be belly dancing on the tables. **Cubby** , you don’t want to know what he does for his Dominatrix. \ It’s worse than anything you’ll see on ConsumptionJunction, that’s for sure! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Spiny\_Norman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Spiny\_Norman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiny_Norman)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/8 "2000-11-03T11:27:42Z")
Great, just great, Coldfire! - Now I’m fighting off a mental image of HM Queen Beatrix “showing skin”… ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/9 "2000-11-03T11:30:06Z")
> [@](#): > > Remember how much I drank at **Yoji’s** , just give me one more than that and I’ll be belly dancing on the tables. Shit. **Now** you tell me. ---
**Author:** ![Trion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@Trion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trion)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 12:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/10 "2000-11-03T12:13:18Z")
:: enters bowing :: Greeting Queen Tater. I bring you riches and bounty from across the sea. First of all I have … :: digs into shopping bag :: … this box of Cap’n Crunch with Crunchberries. Next, a Slim Jim. Finally, this assortment of various potato chip types which the natives refer to as a “Valu Pak”. :: end with grand flourish and fanfare :: ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/11 "2000-11-03T12:34:12Z")
Mmmmm, NumNums, **Trion** truly knows the way straight to my heart! I’m going to appoint him Lord of the Pantry. And it occurs to me that I’ll be needing a few Princesses and Ladies in Waiting and assorted things to round out my court. Any nominees? ---
**Author:** ![Globe-trotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cab0a1/32.png) [@Globe-trotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Globe-trotter)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/12 "2000-11-03T12:40:13Z")
Yo queen! Whatcha got for me? It’d better be good, otherwise I’ll turn anti-royalist on you real quick. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/13 "2000-11-03T12:48:24Z")
**WE HAVE FOUND A REPUBLICAN! MAY WE BURN HER, OH MAJESTY??** ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/14 "2000-11-03T12:48:57Z")
**Globie Girl** , you will be now known as The Princess Royal Globe-Trotter, and are my heir apparent, unless I find somebody to breed with. **Yojimbo** , will be Lord High Confidant, and will advise me on matters of State as well as help me pick out my clothes in the morning. Woo Hoo! Bet he wishes he hadn’t got ICQ now. **Coldfire** will be the Royal Treasurer and will levy taxes and fees as he sees fit to enlarge the Royal Coffers. **Snorman** has already been declared Duke of IMHO and will provide me with opinions if ever I should lack my own. **Twisty** will be Lord of the Dance and is required to wear poofy shirts at all times. Now all we need is some nice Royal Intrigue… ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/15 "2000-11-03T12:51:08Z")
Somehow, **Coldy** , I think her tune will change now that she’s Princess Royal of the Realm. 😃 If not, lock her in the tower and withhold her flicka flicka til she repents. ---
**Author:** ![Globe-trotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cab0a1/32.png) [@Globe-trotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Globe-trotter)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/16 "2000-11-03T12:51:48Z")
Coldie, you’re such a suck up. Don’t forget I’m the Princess Royal. Go back to taxing poor people to death now. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/17 "2000-11-03T13:06:31Z")
I hereby declare a new tax: the Flicka Flicka Tax. For every time a woman uses the Flicka Flicka, she shall donate 20 Florins to the State Treasury - otherwise known as His Magistrate Coldfire. Should a man dare to use the Flicka Flicka, he shall donate 40 Florins to the State Treasury. Also, he shall donate his testicels to the Royal Surgeon - yet to be appointed by her Majesty, Tot of Tater I. ---
**Author:** ![Pergau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7c8e57/32.png) [@Pergau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pergau)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/18 "2000-11-03T13:09:26Z")
Queenie Queenie Queenie Can I have a Peerage please - I’ve always wanted to be Lord Pergau of Dublin. Your most humble and obedient servant. Pergau (commoner) ---
**Author:** ![Globe-trotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cab0a1/32.png) [@Globe-trotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Globe-trotter)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/19 "2000-11-03T13:13:05Z")
Yo Royal Treasurer! How do you propose to enforce the flicka flicka tax? Do you think women are willingly going to tell you they’ve used it? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536/20 "2000-11-03T13:13:11Z")
Good for you, **Coldy**! Should we also levy a [Spankie](http://www.terriblyhappy.com/journal-11-02-00.html) Tax, or do you think the commoners would rebel? Ooh, and it’s been brought to my attention that I forgot all about my life partner when making these appointments. I therefore declare my beloved **Canadian Sue** to be Official Mistress of Her Majesty, Queen tatertot. And no, we will not be needing to pay the flicka flicka tax. 😉 And, yes, **Pergau** you may be Lord of Dublin. In return, you must supply beer and fine whiskeys to all official party occasions. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hail-queen-tatertot/39536.md?page=2)