# All Hallowed Rants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 2, 2017, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781 "2017-10-02T01:01:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2017, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/121 "2017-10-25T07:10:48Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > Y’know what would be really nice? One serious relationship where the other party wasn’t suicidal or self-harming. _One_. Or at least where they don’t _start out_ suicidal or self-harming. I mean, is this kind of thing just way, _way_ more common than I think it is? Or am I doing something wrong to _constantly_ run into this kind of person and start relationships with them? It’s not like I’m especially good at dealing with it - _exactly the opposite_, in fact. Yet you’d think I was filtering my interactions so that the only people I ever start a relationship with universally have serious self-confidence issues. What the hell is going on here? God dammit this keeps happening. (Polyamory sure does have its ups and downs.) I’m sick and tired of being a pillar holding up every single person I interact romantically with. I’m _sick of it_. I feel like I constantly have to be the strong one, constantly have to prop other people up when they’re upset, constantly have to worry about the well-being of those around me. You know what I do when I feel like shit? I fucking _deal with it_! I do my own thing, find my own ways of feeling happy, and only very rarely intentionally burden those around me. That may not be the most healthy thing for _me_, but I’m mostly pretty stable, and I don’t want to need constant propping up, the way a lot of people in relationships with me seem to be. And on top of that, I don’t **want** to tell these people, “Sorry, I can’t take this right now”. Because the last thing I want is for them to hide their depressions and their problems from me. I want to be strong enough to take it, to be that pillar. But I can’t, and I don’t know what to do to minimize harm, or how to handle it, or why this keeps on fucking happening again and again. It’s kind of shit to tell a significant other, “Hey, listen, I’m sorry, but I really can’t handle you being depressed right now”, right? Well, _I really can’t handle it right now_, so I don’t know what the fuck to do. ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2017, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/122 "2017-10-25T19:35:16Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > First, my good news: I don’t have a brain tumor, so that’s nice. > > Second, my rant: > > While I don’t have a brain tumor, I do have a tumor in the back of my right arm. That’s not my actual rant - I’ve had it for at least 7-10 years, but lately it’s been growing very fast and is pressing up against my triceps. So, I went to a dermatologist, who said I could get it out now or wait. I said I’d like to get it out, was advised that my family doc might be able to take it out (probably for cheaper than a specialist), so I visited my family doc. She said I needed to go a surgical center. I made an appointment with the surgical center, stupidly thinking they’d just schedule me and take the fucking thing out. They have to have a consult first, too. Yes, I get it - they shouldn’t cut open my arm before they talk to me first. But holy fucking shit, I am tired of everyone looking at my arm, agreeing that my tumor (which I’ve affectionately named my twin) should/could go and not taking the goddamn thing out. > > I’ve never been so eager before in my life for someone to get over with it already and cut me the fuck open. One of the reasons I’ve waited so long was because anesthesia - local and general - does not generally last long on me, so it took me a lot to psych myself up to do this and I’m really running out of interest. Also, I’m tired of taking time off for this and tired of having different people tell me the exact same thing. I’m so glad you don’t have a brain tumor. And good luck on getting the surgery. I know how frustrating the preliminary stuff can be. I’m sorry you’re going through this. ---
**Author:** ![MissTake](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misstake/32/3189_2.png) [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2017, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/123 "2017-10-25T23:16:40Z")
Snow in the forecast tomorrow night, so I (like everyone else in the neighborhood) decided to get one last mow/leaf pick up done. Until the mower and I ran out of gas. Filled the mower up, but I didn’t have the strength to pull start it. Now I have a patch 20’ x 20’ of unmowed, leafy yard. I hate that I no longer have the strength that I used to have. I hate how my body fails me all the time. Stupid body. ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/124 "2017-10-26T00:38:43Z")
Look, we don’t like visiting you for a number of reasons. We live two time zones away and like it that way. Which is why, when we do pay a fair amount of money to fly to where you live, get a hotel, and rent a car, we don’t want to hear that “we’re not staying long enough” when we’re going to be there six nights from Christmas to New Year’s Eve. We’re mostly going to see your baby, who won’t remember anything that happens when she’s eight months old anyway. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/125 "2017-10-26T05:36:54Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > First, my good news: I don’t have a brain tumor, so that’s nice… In your honor I’m confusing my dogs by loudly repeating what I was shouting when I found out I didn’t have one: _ **“It’s nahht a tumah!”** _ [/ahhhnold] ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/126 "2017-10-26T15:19:10Z")
[Oh, what precious little angels.](http://www.wxyz.com/news/5-teens-charged-as-adults-in-genesee-county-i-75-rock-throwing-death) ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/127 "2017-10-26T15:27:04Z")
Wanna be a little more descriptive. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/128 "2017-10-26T16:10:53Z")
> [@Kimballkid](#): > > Wanna be a little more descriptive. five angelic little sweethearts were bored one night, so they decided to play a “game” of chucking shit off of an overpass onto traffic. one of those things was a 20-lb chunk of concrete, which went through the windshield of a car and caved the driver’s skull in, killing him. then they decided to go eat at McDonald’s. I am so, _so_ glad I don’t have kids. I can’t comprehend what I would do if I found out my kid did something like that. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/129 "2017-10-26T16:13:12Z")
> [@jz78817](#): > > which went through the windshield of a car and caved the driver’s skull in, killing him. The man they murdered was the passenger, not driver. ---
**Author:** ![JcWoman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jcwoman/32/2889_2.png) [@JcWoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JcWoman)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/130 "2017-10-26T16:19:26Z")
After a lifetime of good, strong teeth I suddenly find that my teeth seem to be crumbling to dust. Or “re-absorbing” as my dentist called it this morning. Hopefully it’s not more than one tooth (will find out next week), but he said it wasn’t poor hygiene that caused it, so that leaves menopause or other systemic calcium/mineral problems. He liked the x-ray, though. (a hollowed out shell of a tooth) And I quote: “Wow” ☹ ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/131 "2017-10-26T16:32:05Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > The man they murdered was the passenger, not driver. oh well that changes everything. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2017, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/132 "2017-10-26T17:13:28Z")
> [@jz78817](#): > > oh well that changes everything. It makes it understandable how the vehicle pulled off the road after the murder. It also goes to show a certain level of reader comprehension. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2017, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/133 "2017-10-27T06:29:57Z")
> [@JcWoman](#): > > He liked the x-ray, though. (a hollowed out shell of a tooth) And I quote: “Wow” > > ☹ I’ll add that to the list of things you don’t want to hear a dentist say. When I went in for a root canal, my dentist said “Ooo!” while he was drilling for the canal part. Turns out that the root had started to go a bit necrotic. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2017, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/134 "2017-10-28T14:49:21Z")
October typically features nice weather here in mid-Ohio. Last weekend we had sun and temps in the 70s. The typical end-of-the-month crash has arrived, though. Right now it’s 36F and _snowing_. Blech. ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2017, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/135 "2017-10-28T17:25:35Z")
We’ve had three or so days of muggy, warm, rainy. I’ve just come in from four hours of raking heaps of sodden wet dull brown leaves. Yeah, New England in the fall is so scenic. ---
**Author:** ![stolatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@stolatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stolatt)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2017, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/136 "2017-10-29T00:10:04Z")
My father died last month and while the services went beautifully, the aftermath of paperwork and life without him has been difficult. I keep looking in on my Mom and I wonder if I’m hovering too much. Are my responses to anything appropriate? Then I got some throat infection, which sets me back further in my already behind in everything life. ---
**Author:** ![Eureka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/74df32/32.png) [@Eureka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eureka)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2017, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/137 "2017-10-29T17:46:16Z")
The worst part of playing handbells at all three services is listening to the same announcements (and bad jokes) three times in a row. The worst part of the morning’s services was being nagged about not “shouting” enough on a song that I don’t know, and isn’t in a good register for me to sing out on. (And besides, like half of everyone in fall, I’ve got some post-nasal drip going on and just generally . . . not great for my voice). ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2017, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/138 "2017-10-29T19:53:19Z")
> [@Eureka](#): > > The worst part of playing handbells at all three services is listening to the same announcements (and bad jokes) three times in a row. > > The worst part of the morning’s services was being nagged about not “shouting” enough on a song that I don’t know, and isn’t in a good register for me to sing out on. (And besides, like half of everyone in fall, I’ve got some post-nasal drip going on and just generally . . . not great for my voice). _There’s_ your problem. The handbell choir isn’t supposed to sing. Did you notice that you were the only one belting (or “shouting”?) _“A miiiiiiighty for-OR-tresss, Ih-is ourrrr Goddddd…”_ ---
**Author:** ![Eureka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/74df32/32.png) [@Eureka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eureka)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2017, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/139 "2017-10-29T22:34:01Z")
> [@digs](#): > > _There’s_ your problem. The handbell choir isn’t supposed to sing. > Did you notice that you were the only one belting (or “shouting”?) _“A miiiiiiighty for-OR-tresss, Ih-is ourrrr Goddddd…”_ Well, I sing in the church choir, so yes, I was expected to sing. Although the “song” in question was actually intended to be congregational singing, so it wasn’t just the bell choir or the choir, but everyone in the sanctuary being nagged. I _wish_ we’d been singing “A mighty Fortress . . .” that’s a good song, with compelling lyrics, and a tune, and each verse has different words. (Because of the pastoral nagging, we got “stuck” on a praise chorus, singing it about 4 times in a row. It wasn’t awesome the first time, and was less awesome the fourth time). ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2017, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781/140 "2017-10-30T00:40:05Z")
> [@stolatt](#): > > My father died last month and while the services went beautifully, the aftermath of paperwork and life without him has been difficult. I keep looking in on my Mom and I wonder if I’m hovering too much. Are my responses to anything appropriate? Then I got some throat infection, which sets me back further in my already behind in everything life. I’m so sorry about your father. As for your mom, why don’t you ask her if you’re hovering too much or if she appreciates your presence? I’m pretty sure it will be the latter. Hugs. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-hallowed-rants/797781.md?page=8)