# All right, I'll ask. Being a jerk via PM? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [March 17, 2010, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750 "2010-03-17T13:17:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![xash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c6cbf5/32.png) [@xash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xash)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/161 "2010-03-18T09:54:04Z")
> [@tacoloco](#): > > The way you hate on me makes it seem like I actually did something to harm you in some way. For fuck’s sake, direct that hate at someone who actually deserves it. > > Fucking Emperor Palpatine Old Lady. > > Oh and now playing the part of the former mod defender, Tacoloco, we have AClockworkMelon. Someone who has just shown up and wants people to think they have actual perspective into what happens here and how the board works. > > I don’t give a shit how many goats you’ve fucked AClockworkMelon, you still don’t know what you’re talking about. **tacoloco** , your post is out of line for ATMB. Please do not do this again. If you take exception to being called names other than your poster name, please let me know and I will ensure that others comply in the future. - **xash** Administrator ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/162 "2010-03-18T11:45:37Z")
> [@xash](#): > > **tacoloco** , your post is out of line for ATMB. Please do not do this again. > > If you take exception to being called names other than your poster name, please let me know and I will ensure that others comply in the future. > > - **xash** > Administrator What utter fucking bullshit. MOL takes every fucking opportunity to do that to me and you give ME a fucking warning? Let’s level the playing field then, Xash. Since you know she called me crazyburrito, where’s the fucking warning for that? Oh right, someone has to actually press the goddamned report this post button before anyone will do anything. The funny part is I don’t even care if anyone else gets warned. I just care that the moderators get some kind of fucking consistency in dealing with stuff. > [@](#): > > Also for what it’s worth, don’t worry about Tacoloco. You’re doing just fine here holding your own against these “old-timers”. We’re all set in our ways, but you’re certainly hanging in there just fine in this thread. Amazing double standard there. I got nothing but shit when I did the same exact thing 'Melon is doing and yet, 'Melon gets a pass. Incredible. ---
**Author:** ![xash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c6cbf5/32.png) [@xash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xash)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/163 "2010-03-18T11:53:26Z")
> [@tacoloco](#): > > What utter fucking bullshit. > > MOL takes every fucking opportunity to do that to me and you give ME a fucking warning? > > Let’s level the playing field then, Xash. Since you know she called me crazyburrito, where’s the fucking warning for that? Oh right, someone has to actually press the goddamned report this post button before anyone will do anything. > > The funny part is I don’t even care if anyone else gets warned. I just care that the moderators get some kind of fucking consistency in dealing with stuff. I’ll just restate what I said in response to your PM a few moments ago: I am not familiar with the history between the two of you. I made the call based on what I saw in that [this] thread, and I believe it’s a reasonable call. It was out of line for ATMB. If you take offense to her calling you by variations of your name, I’ll make sure she doesn’t do that again. You should have reported her post instead of responding with the post you got warned for, or you should have called her out on it in the Pit, not in ATMB. Hope you understand my reasoning. -xash Administrator ETA: Note that what I wrote above was originally written in response to **tacoloco** ’s PM, so some of it might seem without context in this thread. ---
**Author:** ![xash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c6cbf5/32.png) [@xash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xash)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/164 "2010-03-18T11:56:12Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > And as some completely unsolicited advice, try to ignore **crazyburrito**. **MeanOldLady** , please do not call **tacoloco** by variations of his name. Thanks. - **xash** Administrator ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/165 "2010-03-18T12:24:06Z")
> [@xash](#): > > **MeanOldLady** , please do not call **tacoloco** by variations of his name. > > Thanks. > > - **xash** > Administrator Awesome. _I_ get a warning, She gets a “moderator note”. Welcome to another episode of Amazing Consistency In Moderation. ---
**Author:** ![ajb867](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f14d63/32.png) [@ajb867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ajb867)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/166 "2010-03-18T12:34:17Z")
Oh my god Xash no!!! Please don’t take away the joy I receive everytime I read MOL calling tacoloco crazyburrito! ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/167 "2010-03-18T13:13:36Z")
> [@xash](#): > > **MeanOldLady** , please do not call **tacoloco** by variations of his name. > > Thanks. > > - **xash** > Administrator But that is like asking Alice not to call Ralph a Big Lug. She does it with thinly veiled love. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/168 "2010-03-18T13:33:35Z")
> [@xash](#): > > **MeanOldLady** , please do not call **tacoloco** by variations of his name. > > Thanks. > > - **xash** > Administrator Aww, but I thought he liked when I called him that. It was our special little thing. Farewell, good times, farewell. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/169 "2010-03-18T13:38:48Z")
“Dammit, kids, if I have to pull this car over _one more time_, there’s gonna be _ **HELL** _ to pay…” ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/170 "2010-03-18T14:18:58Z")
**AClockworkMelon** , you’re going to have \*so \*much fun here if you continue to consider \*agreeing with you \*to be the sole factor in who has a valid opinion. > [@MeanOldLady](#): > > But even if it meant the egregious offense of (gasp!) writing an ATMB thread, zOMG BFD, it’s not a suspend-worthy threat, considering how many threads we have around here about dubious moderation. That’s exactly my point. When did it become against the rules to tell a mod that you thought they were stepping over the line? IMO, having the freedom to confront what we feel are poor moderating decisions is an important. Obviously, it’s equally important for \*frivilous \*accusations to be negatively sanctioned, but to squelch someone before they even get to the point of making an accusation, _or even explicitly threatening to do so_, is stepping over into creepy totalitarian territory as I see it. If I’m going 90 MPH down a 70 MPH highway and a cop pulls me over and rightly tickets me, and I ask for her badge number, if the cop were to arrest me for requesting that information, I think we would all agree that that’s an abuse of power. We have mechanism in place already for dealing with false accusations. Let’s not go down the path of trying to pre-empt ones that haven’t even been made. By and large, the moderation on this site is pretty damn good (within the constraints of the rules you have to enforce), but the ball was seriously dropped on this one. > [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Speaking of which: I’m not seeing anyone’s signatures, despite having the option to see them checked in my CP. There’s even an option for avatars. As has been observed, we don’t have avatars here, and most people don’t display signatures. IIRC, there’s even a rule that you can only display your signature once per page (maybe even only once per thread). > [@BigT](#): > > You have flat out told us you will not moderate PMs. So you don’t get the luxury of moderating your own. You’ve stepped beyond your powers, and did so because someone annoyed you. Also a valid point. If PMs to moderators are now going to be subject to moderation, that should probably be mentioned somewhere. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/171 "2010-03-18T14:20:46Z")
> [@tacoloco](#): > > Awesome. _I_ get a warning, She gets a “moderator note”. She’s not using Pit language in ATMB. ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/172 "2010-03-18T14:56:07Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > You have flat out told us you will not moderate PMs. So you don’t get the luxury of moderating your own. You’ve stepped beyond your powers, and did so because someone annoyed you. Actually I believe the policy is that we as posters can report PM’s sent to us by other users and they will deal with it. If someone sends someone a threatening PM or harasses someone constantly off-boards/via PMs, all the victim has to do is forward the PMs to a Moderator and they’ll look into it and see what can be done. So the policy seems to be that Moderators tend to NOT read PMs and such, HOWEVER if you do choose to send/report a PM, they’ll look into the matter for you. So it’s not policing PMs, but rather it’s up to the judgment of the recipient of the PMs as to how they wish to treat the matter- the options being that they do nothing, they can call out the poster by posting the PM in the public boards, or that they can go to the Moderators and request assistance. And I think it’s only logical to believe that if you send a PM to a Moderator, they WILL police/“report” their own PMs and take actions as they see fit. It’s just common sense. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/173 "2010-03-18T15:33:26Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > IIRC, there’s even a rule that you can only display your signature once per page (maybe even only once per thread). We don’t have any “per page” rules, because the definition of a “page” varies from user to user (you can set the number of posts per page in your User CP). The actual signature rules are in the FAQ [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=7697069#post7697069). Regarding frequency, it says: > [@FAQ - Rules for Posting at the Straight Dope Message Boards](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/faq-rules-for-posting-at-the-straight-dope-message-boards/369395/14): > > **How many times should I include my signature in a thread?** > Once per thread should be sufficient for people to admire the pearl of wisdom included in your signature. If you post multiple times in a thread it is recommended that you only include the signature in one of your posts. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/174 "2010-03-18T15:41:20Z")
**MeanOldLady** said: > [@](#): > > **Irish** , I try not to say nice things to people, on account of being Empress Asshole, or whatever my name is, but I have long taken a liking to you, and this post is key. Thank you. If it makes you feel any better, I promise to think mean thoughts about you. 😉 I’ve been trying to sort out my own feelings on this matter. I can kinda see the moderator’s point of view, but really I just keep coming back to thinking this is an overreaction. First off, an overreaction to **Sleeps** PM response to the first warning, and then an overreaction to the thought **Sleeps** might be threatenting to complain. I guess I just can’t see the ramifications of **Sleeps** coming in and starting an ATMB thread or posting a PM to the admins crying “Marley won’t leave me alone” when all we need to do is post the PM exchange and the story will straighten itself out. I mean, what is so threatening that the Mods need to nip this in the bud? ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/175 "2010-03-18T16:27:41Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > **AClockworkMelon** , you’re going to have \*so \*much fun here if you continue to consider \*agreeing with you \*to be the sole factor in who has a valid opinion. Been there, done that and have scars to prove it. Mean Old Lady, you can call me crazyburrito any time. The point I was making wasn’t specifically about that at all. It was about being consistent with warnings. And that point was completely missed. Just be careful not to call me that in non-pit threads, because you may run afoul of the rules. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/176 "2010-03-18T16:33:34Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Lol, Sleeps said in a PM to a mod that any more messages from that mod would be considered harassment. That’s ludicrous. So saying something ludicrous now is against the rules? There’s gonna be a lot of suspensions ahead. ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/177 "2010-03-18T16:36:20Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > She’s not using Pit language in ATMB. I didn’t use “pit language”. I was warned for calling her Emperor Palpatine Old Lady, which is no worse than being called crazyburrito. I didn’t call her one of the banned dirty words/phrases and I didn’t really make a personal insult. Again, certainly no more of an insult than being called crazyburrito. It is a prime example of inconsistent application of the rules. The only difference I can see is that someone pushed the report button for my post and I didn’t for hers. I don’t consider crazyburrito to be a personal insult and therefore not reportable, not that I’m likely to push that button much anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/178 "2010-03-18T17:08:33Z")
> [@tacoloco](#): > > I didn’t use “pit language”. I was warned for calling her Emperor Palpatine Old Lady, which is no worse than being called crazyburrito. I thought you were warned for saying “I don’t give a shit how many goats you’ve fucked AClockworkMelon, you still don’t know what you’re talking about.” ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/179 "2010-03-18T17:21:44Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > I thought you were warned for saying “I don’t give a shit how many goats you’ve fucked AClockworkMelon, you still don’t know what you’re talking about.” Well reviewing the PM, it could have been for that, but that would be an ever _worse_ reason, as the “goat fuck” thing was a direct reference to something AClockworkMelon said earlier. The exact comment was: _While I don’t have experience on this board in particular, as Penn Jillette would say, this isn’t my first goat fuck._ In this post: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12235226&postcount=98](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12235226&postcount=98) So if that was the reason I got the warning, it should be rescinded. I didn’t make a personal insult, I was referring back to the original comment. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2010, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750/180 "2010-03-18T17:49:24Z")
> [@tacoloco](#): > > I didn’t use “pit language”. I was warned for calling her Emperor Palpatine Old Lady, which is no worse than being called crazyburrito. I didn’t call her one of the banned dirty words/phrases and I didn’t really make a personal insult. Again, certainly no more of an insult than being called crazyburrito. Correction: You called her Fucking Emperor Palpatine Old Lady. How you can misrepresent your own post in this way when it’s right there posted in this thread is beyond me. Are you seriously going to pretend that wasn’t meant as a personal insult? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-right-ill-ask-being-a-jerk-via-pm/532750.md?page=10)