# All rise (?)
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883
**Category:** Factual Questions
**Created:** [June 19, 1999, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883 "1999-06-19T15:59:00Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [June 21, 1999, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/21 "1999-06-21T23:36:00Z")
## “It has always been my contention that every house should include a urinal. Much more practical. Not to mention ridding ourselves of the male vs. female toilet seat struggle.” —sly
## Yea to that, sly. Nice and simple. The house I lived in as a kid had a urinal in the garage. What a boon this must have been to my mother, with five boys and all their friends playing in the back yard every day. Urinals have recently become a fashionable accessory in new homes and remodels. Pretty cool, whatever the reason. Peace, mangeorge
Work like you don’t need the money…
Love like you’ve never been hurt…
Dance like nobody’s watching! Source???
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [June 22, 1999, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/22 "1999-06-22T00:57:00Z")
Great idea, Sly. Put my vote in for urinals, too.
* * *
¾È ³ç, ÁÖ µ¿ ÀÏ
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [June 22, 1999, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/23 "1999-06-22T03:32:00Z")
Maybe it’s a test.All systems working. Then one day, it may not work anymore. Then you can tell your mate:look honey, it doesn’t work anymore.See, it wasn’t anything to do with you so much.
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [June 22, 1999, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/24 "1999-06-22T23:48:00Z")
Come to think of it, I like urinals a lot. All you have to do is get close, then let 'er rip while you stand there and daydream, staring off into space. No need to aim or nothing. You don’t even have to hold on to it, unless you want to. Just like outdoors.
How cool can it get?
Hey, guys, let’s write to our congresspersons. Or vote for me!
I promise a “Pisser In Every Squat”. (PIES)
Peace,
mangeorge
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [June 27, 1999, 8:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/25 "1999-06-27T08:48:00Z")
Oh, yeah? well, I hate urinals, and always have, for a simple reason: I’m terribly piss-shy. _blush_ It’s most embarrassing.
And as for the reason why you wake up with an erection: your penis is tired and confused, and doesn’t know whether it’s coming or going. _badum-bum_
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [June 27, 1999, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/26 "1999-06-27T11:09:00Z")
Urinals are for when you “gotta” go. If you’re just trying to squeeze some more out before you hit the road, you use a stall.I don’t think anybody cares which you use, our system is still faster than the “ladies’ room”. I don’t want to start a war, and I know why they have a couch, but still…
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [June 28, 1999, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/27 "1999-06-28T02:10:00Z")
Sly: the waist. It may be a larger thing to have to bend, but it is much more flexible, and has the side-effect of bending everything attached.
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 7, 1999, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/28 "1999-07-07T07:55:00Z")
Down with urinals. Whoever invented them obviously was either female or just didn’t wear shorts very often.
For you ladies in the audience, wearing shorts while using most of the urinals in existence, no matter where you aim, makes you keenly aware of a light mist hitting your legs. The only designs that are the exception to this rule seem to be the ones that extend all the way to the floor, allowing you to aim low so the stream hits the back of the fixture with a low angle of incidence.
I should start a letter-writing campaign to American Standard or something.
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 7, 1999, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/29 "1999-07-07T10:47:00Z")
A urinal in the garage, mg? That consisted of… a funnel with a length of garden hose pointing outdoors through a hole in the clapboard?
When I was a kid, we had a urinal in the basement. It was called a “laundry sink.”
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 7, 1999, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/30 "1999-07-07T11:02:00Z")
The solution: European urinals, which look like a giant tilted flower vase.
Or the original whole wall urinals you still see at some stadiums.
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 8, 1999, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/31 "1999-07-08T00:25:00Z")
This topic has gone limp, or at least down the urinal.But one more unanswered question from another topic:
> [@](#):
>
> ## Neobican Member posted 05-31-99 05:12 PM
>
> Sort of a funny story… Unknown to me, my mother had left toilet bowl cleaner in the bowl,(I am not sure what it was, maybe bleach) when I relieved myself in said bowl, a chemical reaction took place in where some gas was released but not noticeable. I ALMOST passed out, I just barely got done in time to keep myself off the floor. I thought I read somewhere about this reaction that involves urine, anyone know?
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 8, 1999, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/32 "1999-07-08T01:42:00Z")
o.k I asked my doc. about this once here is what he told me. When you sleep your whole body relaxes, even your penis. Blood then runs into your now relaxed member since there is nothing stopping it. Now the real queston. My wife saw me peeing one morning and I got a split stream. She started to panic and thought that it was broke. After letting her know it happons all the time she asked… “why?” So I ask you guys… “why?”
(btw sorry about my spelling I can’t seem to think straight today 🙂 )
* * *
no matter where you go…there you are
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 8, 1999, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/33 "1999-07-08T02:02:00Z")
## “A urinal in the garage, mg? That consisted of… a funnel with a length of garden hose pointing outdoors through a hole in the clapboard?” —Nickrz
🙂 No, Nick, it was a real urinal. There was a sink, too. No toilet, though. Don’t ask me why.
Peace,mangeorge
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 8, 1999, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/34 "1999-07-08T20:26:00Z")
Speaking of the urinal to bowl cleaner reaction there is a ring burned into the bowl of my commode where my roommate left cleaner in it over night and I got up in the middle of the night to relieve my bladder(neglecting to flush)
the combined chemicals ATE PORCELINE ouch
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 8, 1999, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/35 "1999-07-08T20:35:00Z")
To answer the OP, the “morning wood” functions as a kick-stand to keep you from rolling over onto your stomach, which can be dangerous. See [http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/001388.html](http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/001388.html) .
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 9, 1999, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/36 "1999-07-09T15:56:00Z")
Eureka!! Strainger just answered the funtion of boobs thread as well!
[http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/001303.html](http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/001303.html)
* * *
The overwhelming majority of people have more than the average (mean) number of legs. – E. Grebenik
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 9, 1999, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/37 "1999-07-09T16:06:00Z")
OK…I have a question about the “morning wood” thing…is it the same as a “sexual wood” ? What I mean by that is can it be used…or does it just need to be relieved, by peeing I mean??
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Risk looking foolish for love, for your dreams, and for the joy of living…
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 9, 1999, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/38 "1999-07-09T16:51:00Z")
in response to the evil toilet cleaner fumes.
Urine contains: Ammonia
(not that much, but still)
Toilet bowl cleaner contains: Bleach
(usually for sanitization)
Ammonia+Bleach = poison gas (I believe hydroclorchic acid gas) DO NOT INHALE.
And while you’re at it, never mix household cleaners without checking to make sure there is no ammonia/bleach combination.
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 9, 1999, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/39 "1999-07-09T19:31:00Z")
**Tigs:**
> [@](#):
>
> the “morning wood” thing…can it be used [sexually]?
Well…yeah!! As long as you have your girlfriend and/or wife next to you, of course! You can use it sexually on your own too, but you probably learned that when you were 12.
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [July 9, 1999, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-rise/1883/40 "1999-07-09T19:43:00Z")
My plumbing does not exactly “show” me how that works 🙂 (female) thats why I had to ask…Thank you Strainger 🙂
* * *
Risk looking foolish for love, for your dreams, and for the joy of living…
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