All-time laziest song lyrics

[don_t_ask]

I think the best example, and for perfectly understandable reasons, is Bridge Over Troubled Water. Paul Simon writes two verses and choruses of masterful lyrics expressing a timeless sentiment:

*When you’re weary
Feeling small
When tears are in your eyes
I will dry them all
[etc.] *

Then Art Garfunkel and the producer tell him it needs another verse. And, thinking WTF he writes:

*Sail on Silver Girl,
Sail on by
Your time has come to shine
All your dreams are on their way
*

and so a great song is ruined.

[Suil_Dubh]

This line from the Dead Kennedys’ “California Über Alles” always seemed a bit, umm… forced.

You too, will meet the secret police,
They’ll draft you, and they’ll jail your niece!

The rest of the lyrics are pretty spot on, but those two lines always grated on my nerves.

@Promethea

“Bike” by Pink Floyd

The whole thing has a distinct air of ‘will this do?’ about it.

I always thought “Bike” was a great little bit of silly psychedelia. I never got any sort of “half-assed” vibe from it.

Opinions are different, mileage might very etc. etc.

[Gyrate]

No no no…I think “Life” by Melissa Desiree wins this one:

I’m afraid of the dark
Especially when I’m in the park
When there’s no one else around
Oh I get the shivers
I don’t wanna see a ghost
It’s the sight that I fear most
I’d rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news

Really? You painted yourself into a corner with “most” and “ghost” and all you could think of was “piece of toast”?

But perhaps the chorus will redeem the song:

Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life

Um…no.

[Promethea]

@Suil_Dubh

I always thought “Bike” was a great little bit of silly psychedelia. I never got any sort of “half-assed” vibe from it.

Opinions are different, mileage might very etc. etc.

Well, I can’t deny that I do find the song as a whole quite charming. But I’ve always imagined Syd writing the lyrics by sitting down with an exercise book, chewing the end of his pencil thoughtfully, trying to come up with a proper end to that verse and then just going ‘Oh, bugger it, this’ll do.’

I rather like the lyrics about Gerald the homeless mouse later in the song.

[psychonaut]

@Jeff_Lichtman

From America’s A Horse with No Name:

In the desert you can remember your name,
'Cause there ain’t no one for to give you no pain.

You’d think that, with all that wandering in the desert, they’d find the time to come up with a lyric that doesn’t need a spurious word to make it fit the rhythm of the song.

I don’t see any spurious words there. Which one are you talking about? Is it “for”? If so, are you not aware that this is a perfectly acceptable construction in many dialects of English? That dialect seems to fit the mood of the song quite well.

If any fault is to be found with “A Horse With No Name”, it is the following mindless tautology:

The heat was hot

[Snarky_Kong]

Everclear rhymes “new” with “new” in I Will Buy You a New Life.

[enomaj]

@Snarky_Kong

Everclear rhymes “new” with “new” in I Will Buy You a New Life.

Missy Elliot rhymed “jeans” with “jeans” in an Old Navy commercial with her and Madonna. And she’s a RAPPER!

[Jackmannii]

Uriah Heep used to go entire albums with no evidence of conscious effort.

It’s raining outside
but that’s not unusual

[RealityChuck]

@Argent_Towers

God dammit all, I absolutely knew this song was going to show up in this thread, and it makes me upset. That is a good lyric. The rest of the line is: “He ain’t gonna let those two escape justice/he makes his living off of the people’s taxes.” That is a slant rhyme and is a legitimate rhyming device.

As a lover of Steve Miller I have got to stand up in the defense of these lyrics. They are not “lazy”, if anything they’re a unique departure from typical rhymes.

No, they’re deliberately lazy as a way to match his songwriting. Miller never met a riff he couldn’t recycle.

Back to the topic:

“Elenore” by the Turtles – though it’s deliberately so:

Elenore, gee I think you’re swell
And you really do me well
You’re my pride and joy, et cetera

[Dung_Beetle]

@Milossarian

Billy back, he’s a detective down in Texas,
You know he knows just exactly what the facts is

That lyric makes me want to punch you in the solar plexus.

Oh Jesus, I am doomed to think that and giggle every time I hear this song for the rest of my life.

[Wheelz]

In and around the lake,
Mountains come out of the sky
And they stand there

• Yes, “Roundabout”

Let’s see, I need a line to describe what mountains do. Hmm…

[Annie-Xmas]

In this strange and crazy world in which we live in

Just a little redunant, Sir Paul.

[Turek]

@RealityChuck

“Elenore” by the Turtles – though it’s deliberately so:

Elenore, gee I think you’re swell
And you really do me well
You’re my pride and joy, et cetera

Yeah, but it’s meant to be a bit … tortured:

In the liner notes of The Turtles’ Anthology Solid Zinc, Howard Kaylan of The Turtles explained: “Elenore was a parody of ‘Happy Together.’ It was never intended to be a straight-forward song. It was meant as an anti-love letter to White Whale (their record company), who were constantly on our backs to bring them another ‘Happy Together.’ So I gave them a very skewed version. Not only with the chords changed, but with all these bizarre words. It was my feeling that they would listen to how strange and stupid the song was and leave us alone. But they didn’t get the joke. They thought it sounded good. Truthfully, though, the production on ‘Elenore’ WAS so damn good. Lyrically or not, the sound of the thing was so positive that it worked. It certainly surprised me.”

My addition is the execrable “One Of Us” by Joan Osborne

Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah yeah yeah.

Brillaint. :rolleyes:

[psychonaut]

@Annie-Xmas

In this strange and crazy world in which we live in

Just a little redunant, Sir Paul.

It’s also probably not what he actually sings. There are some (including McCartney, IIRC), who claim that the lyrics are actually “…world in which we’re livin’”.

[Wheelz]

@Annie-Xmas

In this strange and crazy world in which we live in

Just a little redunant, Sir Paul.

Nit-pick: It’s an “ever-changing world.”
But this one has always bugged me because he could so easily have made it “in which we’re livin’” without changing the meaning or the cadence or anything, and the grammar wouldn’t hit the ear with such a thud.

ETA: Whoops, simulpost. psychonaut may be right; those could be the actual lyrics.

[Joey_P]

I’m stealing this from a doper since even though I kinda like the song it’s bugged me ever since someone mentioned it here.

Kid Rock - All Summer Long
And we were trying different things
We were smoking funny things

To paraphrase the other doper. Of course they rhyme, it’s the same f*n word.

[Wheelz]

@Joey_P

I’m stealing this from a doper since even though I kinda like the song it’s bugged me ever since someone mentioned it here.

Kid Rock - All Summer Long
And we were trying different things
We were smoking funny things

To paraphrase the other doper. Of course they rhyme, it’s the same f*n word.

Of course, it’s when you’re smoking those funny things that you realize all words rhyme with themselves. Whoooah!

[Thudlow_Boink]

@Dave_Hartwick

The line “na na na na, na na na na, hey-ey, goodbye” was a lightly-modified placeholder.

@Beware_of_Doug

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na
Batmaaaaaaan

Obligatory XKCD link

[Barkis_is_Willin]

@Milossarian

And the entire song “Abracadabra” is just a collection of awful, lazy, Romper Room lyrics.

I came here to say “Abracadabra.”

Abra abracadabra
I wanna reach out and grab ya
Abra abracadabra
…
…
…
Abracadabra

I always picture Steve Miller throwing in that last “abracadabra” while just kind throwing his hands in the air for lack of coming up with anything else.

[Tukwut]

Here’s another Doors lyric that bugs the crap out of me:

There’s a killer on the road
His brain is squirmin’ like a toad
Come on…