# All time WORST movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 6, 2003, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028 "2003-06-06T06:52:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/161 "2003-06-13T01:36:28Z")
“NOthing but Trouble” was “Nothing but KaKa” ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/162 "2003-06-13T02:26:55Z")
Ooh, Nothing But Trouble! Great choice. Truly rotten movie. I didn’t mind Vanilla Sky, but I actually liked the twist ending. I guess I dug it because it came from completely out of nowhere, and pissed off all the people who were expecting a typical bland Tom Cruise drama. I loved The Long Kiss Goodnight. Great over-the-top “guilty pleasure” action movie. And Bulletproof Monk wasn’t good, this is true, but I still had a lot of fun making fun of the cliche-ridden dialogue and recycled comic book plot. I’ll take a mediocre Chow Yun Fat action comedy over 90% of most “decent” mainstream movies any day. ---
**Author:** ![G-RAY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@G-RAY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G-RAY)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/163 "2003-06-13T04:33:44Z")
Worst ever; Navy Seals, Robinhood Men In Tights, Eraser, Spaceballs and that goddamned piece of crap with Sean Connery as the voice of a talking dragon. I was at a theater that seved pizza and beer and I walked out . ---
**Author:** ![And\_that\_s\_the\_bottom\_line](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df788c/32.png) [@And\_that\_s\_the\_bottom\_line](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/And_that_s_the_bottom_line)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/164 "2003-06-13T08:26:23Z")
Wow, I can’t believe no one has mentioned the Madonna and Britney Spears crapvehicles **Swept Away** and **Crossroads**. Of course, this is probably because no one wants to admit to actually watching this drivel. But I’m man enought to admit it! 😛 Anyway, I’d rather blow my brains out than watch either one of these movies again. While I quite enjoyed the first half of **Cube** , the ending pissed me off to no end. No explanation as to who was behind it all or why they were all chosen to be placed in this cube. And the only person who survives is the annoying retard? Whatever. For those who have seen **Kids** is it really that disturbing or is it actually worth seeing? ---
**Author:** ![sajwalke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/edb3f5/32.png) [@sajwalke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sajwalke)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/165 "2003-06-13T11:18:47Z")
Robocop. You know when movie’s are so bad their good? Well this went past that and into the realm of painful. My stomach actually hurt from watching it! Just something about the fact that I’m supposed to feel anything for all these characters… _shudder_ ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/166 "2003-06-13T13:34:27Z")
My vote for worst movies: ANYTHING made by those two hacks (Golan and Globus) of the “Cannon Group”: such gems as : -SURF NAZIS MUST DIE -CHUCK NORRIS ficks and finally (not a G&G piece of crap): Tom Loughlans’s “BILLY JACK” Absolute garbage! ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Death](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecccb3/32.png) [@Evil\_Death](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Death)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/167 "2003-06-13T15:19:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by And that’s the bottom line \* > \*\*While I quite enjoyed the first half of **Cube** , the ending pissed me off to no end. No explanation as to who was behind it all or why they were all chosen to be placed in this cube. And the only person who survives is the annoying retard? \*\* May I suggest that you take the following steps: 1. Watch the damn film. Worth explains who built the Cube - him, among others - and why people were put into it. 2. Smash your skull against a wall until you’re as retarded as the handicapped people you despise so. Then you can stop bothering us. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dc4da7/32.png) [@The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_With_The_Golden_Gun)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/168 "2003-06-13T15:47:27Z")
> [@](#): > > For those who have seen Kids is it really that disturbing or is it actually worth seeing? YMMV, but I would not watch Kids again if my dick grew one inch for every minute it played. ---
**Author:** ![G-RAY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@G-RAY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G-RAY)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/169 "2003-06-14T01:57:23Z")
Conair. What a steam load that was. A walk in the clouds and Austin Powers ---
**Author:** ![G-RAY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@G-RAY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G-RAY)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/170 "2003-06-14T01:58:33Z")
Wait let me correct that Conair was a STEAMING load. Not a steam load. sorry ---
**Author:** ![bbart4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/51bf81/32.png) [@bbart4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bbart4)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/171 "2003-06-14T02:15:05Z")
I am surprised nobody mentioned Independence Day. If it was supposed to be a parody I totally missed it. ---
**Author:** ![And\_that\_s\_the\_bottom\_line](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df788c/32.png) [@And\_that\_s\_the\_bottom\_line](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/And_that_s_the_bottom_line)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/172 "2003-06-14T05:53:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Evil Death \* > \*\*May I suggest that you take the following steps: > > 1. Watch the damn film. Worth explains who built the Cube - him, among others - and why people were put into it. > > 2. Smash your skull against a wall until you’re as retarded as the handicapped people you despise so. Then you can stop bothering us. \*\* 1. Whoa there, **Evil Death**. I never said I despised the mentally challenged or handicapped. I’m sorry if I gave that impression or offended anyone. My comment was in sole reference to the character in **Cube**. The character in the movie just got on my nerves. 2. There is conjecture as to who built the Cube and why but no definitive answer. That is what bothered me. 3. Stop jumping to conclusions. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Death](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecccb3/32.png) [@Evil\_Death](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Death)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 9:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/173 "2003-06-14T09:43:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by And that’s the bottom line \* > \*\*2. There is conjecture as to who built the Cube and why but no definitive answer. That is what bothered me. \*\* Worth’s answer certainly sounds reasonable enough to me. However, not giving the viewer any more information than the characters would have is a very common technique to draw the viewer in to the plot and get them to empathise with the characters. Nor was it done incompetently in Cube. The flaw is in you, not in the film; it’s your need to know everything that took away much of the enjoyment for you. \*\* > [@](#): > > 1. Stop jumping to conclusions. \*\* Didn’t jump - you pushed me. ---
**Author:** ![refusal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ac91a4/32.png) [@refusal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/refusal)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/174 "2003-06-14T18:03:36Z")
I can watch almost anything, from the dismally unfunny (to me) **Look who’s talking too** and **Up In Smoke** , to John Boorman’s woeful **Excalibur** (a film in which it seems they forgot to hire any writers or lighting, since it takes place in incoherently-plotted darkness), or utterly inept British actioners like **Hardware** , not to mention the oeuvre of Ed Wood. But the only 2 films I can think of that I have been completely unable to watch, even if I paused the video to draw breath or left the room for 5 minutes are **Glitter** , which my little sister repeatedly tried to make me watch (I’ve survived her **Grease 2** fetish, so this is far worse) and **Sleepless in Seattle** (I tried 2 or 3 times on this because I really liked When Harry Met Sally and generally enjoy rom-coms, but it was just too sickly and contrived and stupid). ---
**Author:** ![Jman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jman/32/4416_2.png) [@Jman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jman)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2003, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/175 "2003-06-14T21:11:18Z")
I have to agree that a lot of the films mentioned here are purely out of ‘it was reviewed well and I hated it, therefore it must really really suck.’ However much you hate _Titanic_, calling it the worst movie ever made means you’ve either only seen 5 movies, or you are ignorant. Can you honestly, with a straight face, say that movies such as _Kazaam_ or _Barb Wire_ were better acted and produced than _Titanic?_ Anyway, going to recent films: I nominate _Critical Mass_. I was unfortunate enough to see the last half of this in a public viewing room, and was amazed at just how pathetic a movie could become. It tries to be serious about the scenes, but it so completely rediculous, with such horrible cardboard acting, that I almost couldn’t believe was I was seeing. I don’t think it’s likely the worst movie ever, but it’s the worst movie I’ve seen any part of in the last several years. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/176 "2003-06-15T06:53:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by refusal \* > utterly inept British actioners like **Hardware** , Hey!! That was a fun film! Lemmy, a trippy fractal zoom, a killer-robot-drill-dick, spray-painting a metal skull while Ministry plays, that peeping tom’s freaky “And weee allll walk the widdily waddly waalk!” song, and Dylan McDermott doing his “Mad Max” impersonation? All with Iggy Pop as “Angry Bob” as the radio DJ? I just wish the X rated version was available around here… ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/177 "2003-06-15T17:29:52Z")
Well, this isn’t the worst movie ever. Not even the worst movie I’ve seen myself. But it is the movie I hate above all other movies. **Blast from the Past** ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2003, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/178 "2003-06-15T20:09:09Z")
ugh… The Matrix. I know everyone’s gonna hate me for that, but I fell asleep during the first one and woke up later to re-watch it. I realized I hadn’t missed anything. ---
**Author:** ![DavisMcDavis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dfb087/32.png) [@DavisMcDavis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavisMcDavis)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/179 "2003-06-23T21:45:41Z")
**Hollywood Homicide** Some movies are flawed or bad, and I’ve still managed to enjoy them, but that one was so utterly humorless that I was annoyed it had stolen 2 hours of my life. I want to point out that although this is a recent release, I am a 29-year old adult, and have really have seen lots of movies and it still stands out there as one of the most truly horrible films I have ever seen. Even **The Blair Witch Project** , for example, had an interesting 30 seconds of footage at the end which almost redeemed it for me, and live action cartoons like **Showgirls** have entertained me in the past, but **Hollywood Homicide** failed to meet even my incredibly low standards for bland cop-buddy-type comedies. It’s like they didn’t even try to put jokes in the movie, and seeing as there was only one suspect in the titular homicide, there was no point in watching the movie at all. I just hate it so much… I just love using the word ‘titular’ ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028/180 "2003-06-23T23:48:03Z")
I’m a bit surprised nobody’s mentioned: **Xanadu Star Trek V** [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-time-worst-movie/180028.md?page=10)