# All Trek, All the time **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 28, 2003, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021 "2003-02-28T00:24:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/21 "2003-02-28T15:18:27Z")
**Quark’s** : Everybody’s favorite bartender gets his own half-hour comedy. **Come to Risa** : Sort of a cross between _The Love Boat_ and _Fantasy Island._ And the Panda is always off its leash. **The Boomer Way** : A close-knit trading family crosses the spacelanes in their Warp 1.5 ship, just trying to make ends meet. **Warbirds** : The Klingon- Romulan War. No Federation in sight. Lots of 'splosions. **Dr. Phlox, M.D.** : Our favorite xeno-doc sets up practice right next door to _Quark’s._ Another half-hour comedy. **Boothby’s Trials** : Set in San Francisco, Boothby tries to herd a new class Cadets through Star Fleet Training. **Federation’s End** : Waaay out on the Frontier, with the closest Starship three weeks away, the farthest Federation Outpost tries to keep the peace. With extra Tellerite miners! **Young Jean Luc** : Picard with hair. ---
**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/22 "2003-02-28T16:11:26Z")
Would that be _Lucky Luc_? The first thing I would do is go back in time and kill Berman. Then let things unroll as they may and marvel at the non-existence of ‘Voyager’ and “Enterprise” ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/23 "2003-02-28T16:32:59Z")
**Janice Rand, P.I.** : After getting cachiered from Starfleet for a crime she did not commit, ex-Yeoman Janice “Jannie the Uncanny” Rand becomes a private investigator looking into those cases Starfleet can’t, or won’t, investigate. Aided by her experimental robot “Jim”, she helps the helpless, defends the defenseless and keeps a lookout for the “One-Antenaed Andorian” that can clear her name. **The Lone Ranger 2407** : After being left for dead on a desolate planet, Security Officer Red Shirt is nursed back to health by a mysterious Betazoid. Together they protect terraform farmers from bad guys. (Animated) **This Old Orbital Habitat** : Norm Abrams is revived as a clone and he repairs decrept space stations. Watch for Scotty, Geordi, Trip and Chief O’Brian throughout the season! ---
**Author:** ![gonzoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a6a055/32.png) [@gonzoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzoron)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/24 "2003-02-28T16:58:09Z")
Call me boring, but I would just start DS9 back up again. Pick up 10 years later from the finale, slowly reunite the cast over the first season or so and then get back to cranking out the awesome episodes. And maybe add Porthos and Voyager’s doctor for no good reason. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/25 "2003-02-28T18:11:18Z")
In my pilot I would continue the story line by picking up clues involving obscure Trek characters, places, races. And, along the way, picking up certain other crew members, I’ll decide who later. Any ways, while finding all these clues (intellectual), the ship is being chased, boarded, attacked by an unknown enemy (sploshins!). This enemy stalks some people and kills them in a bloody melee. It’s a very adaptable enemy, so Picard et al are having their hands full while Gary tries to figure out who they are and how they fit into this problem of his. T’Pol, meanwhile, is in sickbay, Dr. Selar is taking care of her. In the dim, warm private sickbay room they have her in, we see some one sitting in the shadows. Humanoid, male. He stands up into a key light and we see that it is Fox Mulder! OK, I mean David Duchuvney, not Fox. Zoom back to wide shot showing T’Pol Sleeping. He lets himself out of the room and we hear in the background (camera still on T’Pol in bed, wide shot) Dr. Selar say, “Who are you? What were you doing in there?” Then a lot of crashing type sounds and Selar choking out through blood gurgling in throat, “Sick bay to Bridge! Emer…Arrgh!” End of two hour pilot. This particular conflict remains unresolved through several episodes even though a few other eps deal with totally unrelated stuff, even a light and comedic ep. Typical Trek, but with a twist, you see. ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/26 "2003-02-28T18:16:58Z")
I have no opinion on when it will be set or who would be in it. What I **would** do, though, is to find the best damn writer I can get (JMS or Harlan Ellison, for example), give them a rock-solid 5 year contract, tell them to give me 22 episodes per season, no filler, all the stipulations in the OP and turn them loose with all the special effects and casting budget they need. It would be a thing of beauty. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/27 "2003-02-28T19:16:43Z")
**EMH Trek: The Search For a Name** ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/28 "2003-02-28T20:00:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Degrance \* > I’ve posted this one before but I would really like to see a civilian ship. > > You could do more interesting characters because they won’t have all been through the Acadamy mill. > > The ship itself would be home to these people and so would be something other than the blue and grey military decore of every Enterprise. > > They would have to face more problems than a Fereration ship because they would have the Fereration to worry about as well as everthing else lurking out there. > > The prospect of having a useful but disfunctional character is intreaguing. Something else that is all but impossible with Star Fleet. > \ Hey, I got a title for you: _Star Trek: Firefly_. What? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/29 "2003-02-28T21:38:38Z")
**Warbirds** : I don’t know why but I’ve got a picture in my head of a sci-fi Thornbirds pastiche. William Shatner will take the Richard Chamerlain role and the actress who played the female Romulan commander will be the main female lead. WWF Star Trek: All the varous female stars of all the various Star Treks will mud wrestle each other. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2003, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/30 "2003-02-28T21:58:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CuriousCanuck \* > \*\*I’d like to see something set about 1000 years in the future when there was galactic peace achieved and one big “federation” type entity. (This was addressed atthe very end of the book “Federation”.) Anyway, as a ship’s crew leaves the milky way to travel to another galaxy they see in the vast emptiness a beacon. As they travel to the beaconm they see a message left from an ancient culture welcoming them to their real purpose… and they step through the door into… another universe just beginning to form. Where the mission of the crew is to make this universe into their own creation. Palying god perhaps, but trying to do so in a way that physics doesnt fail, and that people aren’t jerks. > > Playing god with a new universe while on a space ship sounds like fun… \*\* Pssssst! You need to read [The Wounded Sky](http://www.fantasticfiction.co.uk/books/n1/n8825.htm?authorid=4684) by Diane Duane. That is all. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/31 "2003-03-01T00:15:12Z")
Actually, on a totally serious level, I’d sort of like to see what I guess would be called _Starfleet Black Ops._ It would be a covert investigation and black-bag organization — sort of “The Agency” but with pointy ears and ray guns. Because, I mean, come on, you know there has to be _something_ going on behind the scenes to keep the utopia running smoothly. I can’t imagine Picard and the flagship are dispatched to Kronos every single time the Klingons start gettin’ persnickety. Just for added grins and giggles, it might be fun to run the series in parallel to some existing Trek. You’d piss off the hardcore fans (and I’m sure I’ll get hammered in this thread), but imagine a pilot that starts with a familiar, previously-seen situation, but immediately veers off into unknown territory, sort of like what DS9 did with that “Tribbles and Tribulations” show. Naturally, you wouldn’t want to do this every single time, or even much more than once a season: The gimmick would get stupid and old really fast, and you’d be undercutting the adventures of the original show if you showed how the original heroes weren’t “really” saving the day after all. There’s still plenty of room for standalone adventures of the sort Trek occasionally tried to shoehorn in but that didn’t really fit: the “theta-band radiation” thing Picard was supposed to be investigating that got him captured by the Cardassians in “Chain of Command” (a painfully stupid setup that led unexpectedly to an impressive second half), or that episode “Gambit” where Picard was undercover on that smugglers’ ship, or the TOS episode where Spock seduced the Romulan commander so Kirk could steal the cloaking thing, or whatever. Call me crazy, but I think a lean, fast, and mean action-oriented Trek series is exactly what we need to counteract the bloated self-importance that’s been weighing down the last couple of incarnations. The trick would be to make it not so dark that it totally violates The Great Bird’s overall optimistic vision, but it could be fun nonetheless. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/32 "2003-03-01T01:31:31Z")
The funny ones are fine, but some of those serious ones… _ **WOW!** _ See? There’s plenty of life left in the Star Trek franchise, _if they would just do it right!_ The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. Or the one. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/33 "2003-03-01T02:02:34Z")
_ **I dedicate my 2000th post to all the Trek Dopers everywhere!** _ Whew! I’m glad that’s over with. Now, back to posting… ---
**Author:** ![AtomicDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@AtomicDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AtomicDog)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/34 "2003-03-01T02:35:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cervaise \* > \*\*Actually, on a totally serious level, I’d sort of like to see what I guess would be called _Starfleet Black Ops._ It would be a covert investigation and black-bag organization — sort of “The Agency” but with pointy ears and ray guns. > > \*\* This sounds like a “Section 31” series. I like!!! ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/35 "2003-03-01T03:46:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Balance \* > \*\*Hey, I got a title for you: _Star Trek: Firefly_. > > What? 😃 \*\* * * * **Balance,** you’re killing me! On **VivaTrek** , the officers abandon their silly old “exploration” missions and instead seek out every planet there is with a casino (heavy on the nickel slots and at least one fight over a progressive jackpot in every other episode), lounge band, stand-up comedy team, superduper midnight buffet, museum of bizarre kitsch–but only from their own culture, since they’ve realized they’re no longer interested in other people. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/36 "2003-03-01T03:50:08Z")
Hey! We could redo _Casino Royale_ with real scripts! :rolleyes: :dubious: All your Treks belong to me. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/37 "2003-03-01T05:23:19Z")
> [@](#): > > **Call me boring, but I would just start DS9 back up again. Pick up 10 years later from the finale, slowly reunite the cast over the first season or so and then get back to cranking out the awesome episodes.** No, no… not at all. That’s one of the coolest ideas in this thread behind my own (Romulans!), Bryan Ekers’, and Cervaise’s. Just re-establish the Obsidian Order’s alliance with the Tal Shiar (Romulans!) and you have the most awesomest Trek ever. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/38 "2003-03-01T06:28:52Z")
**Panda Trek!** Needs no explanation and is actually already in progress, though not yet on a major network. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![FabioClone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5f8ce5/32.png) [@FabioClone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FabioClone)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/39 "2003-03-01T07:57:02Z")
These are the voyages of the U.S.S. Karaoke It’s mission- to groove to the music If there’s one thing Star Trek has taught me, it’s that the actors have some sort of perverted need to sing. Why not just let them? Look at Data- he’ll burst into song at the slightest provocation. They spent half the series and most of the movies trying to shut him up. The Doctor from Voyager could finally indulge his opera fetish. He even corrupted Seven, if I remember correctly. When you have to deal with the issue of singing Borg, it’s best just to create a new series to handle the problem. UPN wasn’t ready. Picard could rock out on his little recorder while Riker jams on his trombone. Harry Kim plays clarinet so poorly that Sisko tries to bean him with that baseball. Things are coming together now! Of course, there can be only one true captain on this ship. William Shatner himself, starting out the pilot episode with his rendition of “Lucy in the Sky with Dimonds.” Spock follows his example with his versions of “If I Had a Hammer” and “Highly Illogical.” The Romulans won’t stand a chance. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2003, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021/40 "2003-03-01T15:13:21Z")
I am in awe as I stare blankly at my monitor (no, not the lizard), trying in vain to assimilate all this infortion and new ideas. If my brain wasn’t so highly developed, it would implode. Where did all thee other guys come from? And what happened to some of the posters I saw in older linked threads? How many Trek Dopers are there? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/all-trek-all-the-time/158021.md?page=3)