# Allow me to introduce myself **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 31, 2013, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865 "2013-01-31T01:34:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Butcher\_Cook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@Butcher\_Cook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Butcher_Cook)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/1 "2013-01-31T01:34:42Z")
I am Butcher Cook. I am excited to belong to this internet community. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/2 "2013-01-31T01:42:41Z")
So, **BC** , are you a butcher and a cook? Or just one really terrible cook? ---
**Author:** ![Butcher\_Cook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@Butcher\_Cook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Butcher_Cook)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/3 "2013-01-31T01:44:10Z")
I am a butcher who has the last name of Cook. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/4 "2013-01-31T01:47:42Z")
> [@Butcher\_Cook](#): > > I am a butcher who has the last name of Cook. Ahhh, even better! Well glad to meet you and I hope you last. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/5 "2013-01-31T01:50:58Z")
are you wealthy with good taste? ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/6 "2013-01-31T01:51:03Z")
welcome aboard! and thank you for not leading off by telling us what your IQ is. (previous new poster thought that was the best way to make friends and influence people. he was wrong. we made that clear to him. hasn’t been seen since. 😉 thanks for not doing that.) ---
**Author:** ![Butcher\_Cook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@Butcher\_Cook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Butcher_Cook)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/7 "2013-01-31T01:55:38Z")
Thank you all for your heartfelt welcomes! I feel as if I have stumbled upon the right board – I feel as if I am home. God bless you all. God bless you. ---
**Author:** ![USCDiver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/uscdiver/32/354_2.png) [@USCDiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/USCDiver)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/8 "2013-01-31T01:59:34Z")
> [@Butcher\_Cook](#): > > … God bless you all. God bless you. I think you and **James Otto Sweet Heart** will get along well! ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/9 "2013-01-31T02:01:59Z")
> [@Butcher\_Cook](#): > > I feel as if I have stumbled upon the right board – God bless you all. God bless you. Hmm…These words seem rather incongruous. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/10 "2013-01-31T02:05:59Z")
> [@johnpost](#): > > are you wealthy with good taste? Ooooo, Ooooo, Ooooo, Ooooo! ---
**Author:** ![chiroptera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/11 "2013-01-31T02:06:49Z")
> [@Butcher\_Cook](#): > > Thank you all for your heartfelt welcomes! I feel as if I have stumbled upon the right board – I feel as if I am home. God bless you all. God bless you. Ruh roh. This does not bode well. Welcome! Now prove yourself. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/12 "2013-01-31T02:11:44Z")
> [@Butcher\_Cook](#): > > I am a butcher who has the last name of Cook. Better than a butcher barber… Welcome! ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/13 "2013-01-31T02:13:41Z")
Welcome Butcher Cook! And may heaven’s finest blessings shower down upon you! 10,000 Salaams! ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/14 "2013-01-31T02:17:40Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > Better than a butcher barber… But is being a barber butcher a bit better? ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/15 "2013-01-31T02:30:43Z")
Welcome, **Butcher Cook**! > [@Ambivalid](#): > > But is being a barber butcher a bit better? That’s a lot of alliteration from an anxious **Ambivalid** ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/16 "2013-01-31T02:37:20Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > But is being a barber butcher a bit better? Yes, if he’s butchering the BUTCHER BARBER OF SEVILLE! ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/17 "2013-01-31T02:40:25Z")
> [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](#): > > Welcome, **Butcher Cook**! > > That’s a lot of alliteration from an anxious **Ambivalid** Anxiolytics aid awesome ole Ambivalid. 😃 no, not really ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/18 "2013-01-31T02:57:52Z")
Welcome, **Butcher Cook**! In your honor, we will all do the Butcher Dance. Oh, you butcher right foot in. You butcher right foot out. You butcher right foot in and you shake it all about. What? ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/19 "2013-01-31T04:00:59Z")
Welcome, welcome! Since you have at least _some_ sort of relationship with cooking, allow me to introduce you to our latest treat. _drumroll_ Ultraviolet Ice Cream! It’s our latest treat! With a delicate lilac flavour, you’ve never tasted anything like it before. And it’s reflective down to 285 nanometres! Come along to the [del]testing[/del] tasting room, just here on the right. And enjoy our complimentary goggles and sunscreen! :: the door closes softly and heavily behind **Butcher Cook** :: [sub] :: squints at paper :: Oh, wait. That’s “Ultra_violent_ Ice Cream”. Oops. :: pause :: He’ll be fine. [/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865/20 "2013-01-31T04:50:54Z")
All I can say is, we are highly overrated. Welcome, and keep your disappointment well hidden. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/allow-me-to-introduce-myself/648865.md?page=2)