# Almost got that backyard landscaping done

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/almost-got-that-backyard-landscaping-done/61994>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [April 14, 2001, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/almost-got-that-backyard-landscaping-done/61994 "2001-04-14T21:42:26Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 1

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\
**Post date:** [April 14, 2001, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/almost-got-that-backyard-landscaping-done/61994/1 "2001-04-14T21:42:26Z")

</div>

Due to lack of time, patience, and motivation I really wasn’t getting anywhere with my backyard landscaping. Then, I did something that has sped up the process by leaps and bounds. With a mighty heave, I lifted my black, ball-point pen, and wrote a check out to a professional landscaper. Soon my hard work will be complete, when with another stroke of the pen I write a check for the second half of the landscaping cost. Frankly, I am completely exhausted right now. I really need my shoulders massaged; this mighty pen-lifting has created much tension in my deltoids.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\
**Post date:** [April 15, 2001, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/almost-got-that-backyard-landscaping-done/61994/2 "2001-04-15T00:10:50Z")

</div>

You paid BEFORE they did the work? Hmmmmmm. I do that work, buts its a lot of labor as you know. We have our special tricks used to pad things so we get more money 🙂

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\
**Post date:** [April 15, 2001, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/almost-got-that-backyard-landscaping-done/61994/3 "2001-04-15T00:16:25Z")

</div>

Umm handy, he only paid half…

As for the massage, I could give you one.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\
**Post date:** [April 15, 2001, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/almost-got-that-backyard-landscaping-done/61994/4 "2001-04-15T01:52:07Z")

</div>

Sounds great, techy! While you’re at it, would you stand on this one spot on my upper back just to the left of my spine? Maybe hit it with a sledgehammer or run over it with my pick-up? It is just _killing_ me lately.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\
**Post date:** [April 15, 2001, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/almost-got-that-backyard-landscaping-done/61994/5 "2001-04-15T02:10:09Z")

</div>

But of course, just remember I am not exactly petite anymore…still a size six but I carry a 135-140 pounds these days. Can you handle that?

Oh and I just picked up some Ylang Ylang massage oil today it’s a very soft and clean fragrance.

\< sigh \> he’s lives just outside of freakin Phoenix, damn, damn, damn! Let’s see that’s a 13 hour drive from here. See you in a bit. 😉

\< techie gives outstanding massages, yesh she does! \>