# Aloni(ci)st is a creep **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 27, 2001, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507 "2001-04-27T06:37:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Alonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Alonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonist)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/1 "2001-04-27T06:37:10Z")
It makes you shudder that someone as reprehensible (and clueless) as I is allowed by society to vote, mate (ewww!), run free on the streets, and even post on _this very board_ with decent folks like you. I know it bothers you. Please, be my guest: get it out of your system. ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/2 "2001-04-27T06:41:57Z")
Umm… What brought this on? ---
**Author:** ![Alonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Alonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonist)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/3 "2001-04-27T06:56:45Z")
Oh, I had some people mad at me a month or two ago and wondered if they still wanted to vent. I couldn’t reply to all of their expressions of dislike, and occasionally feel a little unwelcome when I sign on to the boards. ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/4 "2001-04-27T07:49:43Z")
OK, I’ll have a go! You jumped all over me in a thread a few days ago… I probably deserved it (can’t remember which one right now or I’d link to it) , but this IS the Pit, so: Go felch a marmot, **Alonist**! ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/5 "2001-04-27T08:00:04Z")
All right, I keep waiting for someone to use this word in a self-explanatory context, but after a year or more on this board I give up:[ul]_What, exactly, does **felch** mean?_[/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Alonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Alonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonist)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/6 "2001-04-27T08:25:08Z")
How the heck am I supposed to answer people’s questions and hunt for a marmot at the same time? (And what’s the difference between a marmot and a marmoset? Would either do?) As it was explained to me in an issue of **Gauntlet** magazine (#20, if you want to look it up), felching is a more or less disgusting sexual act involving the semi-ingestion of spent fluids and their deposit in a different orifice than that from whence they came. I believe that there are categories of felching, determined by the type of fluids and bodily orifices involved. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Kumquat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/7 "2001-04-27T08:27:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lissener \* > \*\*after a year or more on this board I give up:[ul]_What, exactly, does **felch** mean?_[/ul] \*\* Well, you did ask.[A definition can be found here](http://members.tripod.com/~nelson_g/english.html#F) ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/8 "2001-04-27T09:46:19Z")
Boy, did this get hijacked! People, people! We’re supposed to be soundly cursing **Alonist** here! Let’s get back on topic, shall we?😃 ---
**Author:** ![Alonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Alonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonist)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/9 "2001-04-27T09:50:01Z")
I confidently expect that these confusions will be cleared up in the next “Ask the Felcher!” thread in GD. And I am now in the position of having hijacked my own thread! Let the Alonist-bashing continue, shall we…? ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/10 "2001-04-27T10:32:25Z")
What the fuck is this all about? Do you think this is an S&M club? ---
**Author:** ![Alonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Alonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonist)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/11 "2001-04-27T11:46:56Z")
Mom used to collect S&M Green Stamps- but she switched over to Top Value when they came along. ---
**Author:** ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/12 "2001-04-27T13:02:08Z")
> [@](#): > > Mom used to collect S&M Green Stamps Hmmmmm…what do you think she traded them in for? A ball gag or the leather corset? 😃 (Nothing against your fair mum, of course) ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/13 "2001-04-27T13:37:23Z")
The “low monthly charges” and the “streaming video” not fulfilling all your entertainment needs this month or something? ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/14 "2001-04-27T14:05:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lissener \* > \*\*All right, I keep waiting for someone to use this word in a self-explanatory context, but after a year or more on this board I give up:[ul]_What, exactly, does **felch** mean?_[/ul] \*\* [Gotta say it…] You know, for someone who’s been on a year or more, you’re not a very good **lissener**! 😃 Or reader, perhaps… **Coldfire** : YES! ---
**Author:** ![Alonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Alonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonist)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2001, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/15 "2001-04-27T14:53:09Z")
I finally did get RealPlayer installed (the free version- it’s tricky, watch it like a hawk during installation and then rightclick on the bar icons-it will put them on even if you ask it not to- and unclick any options you can live without, so it doesn’t surprise you later) but have only used it so far for listening to streaming audio on the [t0w3r](http://www.t0w3r.com) sites. Don’t try the “Comedy” channel; you’ll be sorry. Yes, Mom is fair- not great, but fair. I think we got the leather corset with BIG BONUS stamps, which were so popular around here in the mid-60’s. I’ll be back for more abuse after 3:00 tomorrow morning. Thanks, **magdalene** , for showing up- I was sorry I spoiled your thread. ---
**Author:** ![Spavined\_Gelding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@Spavined\_Gelding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spavined_Gelding)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2001, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/16 "2001-04-28T04:35:45Z")
Re: fletch I am so, so sorry that I followed that link. (Shutter) I will repeat to myself ten times: fletching is the act of attaching guide feathers to an arrow, nothing else, ever. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2001, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/17 "2001-04-28T05:02:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Alonist \* > \*\*I’ll be back for more abuse after 3:00 tomorrow morning. Thanks, **magdalene** , for showing up- I was sorry I spoiled your thread. \*\* So sorry, in fact, that you decided to create this thread out of sheer humbling repentance. Because ego stroking limelight grabbing narcissistically chauvanistic tendencies are way beyond your capacity to comprehend. ---
**Author:** ![Redboss](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8baadc/32.png) [@Redboss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redboss)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2001, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/18 "2001-04-28T05:16:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Alonist \* > \*\*felching is a more or less disgusting sexual act involving… \*\* disgusting? disgusting? There’s nothing disgusting about felching mate! It’s certainly not more disgusting than kissing or cunnilingus. Perfectly natural. In fact, noew that I’ve been reminded of it, I think I’ll go and arrange a felching session with my boyfriend for tonight, right after the Leather Pride Party. And what’s new with **you?** ---
**Author:** ![Alonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Alonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonist)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2001, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aloni-ci-st-is-a-creep/63507/19 "2001-04-28T10:21:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Enderw24 \* > \*\* Because ego stroking limelight grabbing narcissistically chauvinistic tendencies are way beyond your capacity to comprehend. \*\* Thank goodness I don’t understand sarcasm, either. * * * There are those so neurotic about touching “that” part of the body that they don’t even bathe themselves there. I don’t remember Mommy ever reminding me to wash my asshole; I only started paying special attention to that area in later life, after reading a discussion by Allen Ginsberg and some friends about how Americans, in general, don’t clean properly down there, and how much healthier was the Indian sub-continental custom of washing after each bowel movement. People who are used to leaving that area dirty might well be disgusted by the idea of touching it with the tongue. (I don’t mean to say anything against people who prefer to lick feathers.) I have also seen people react negatively to the idea of ingesting one’s own sperm. * * * fihi ma fihi