# Alphabetical how long to close the trail because of bears **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [June 27, 2023, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176 "2023-06-27T14:05:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Bicycle\_Bill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bicycle_bill/32/6208_2.png) [@Bicycle\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bicycle_Bill)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2023, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/181 "2023-07-23T17:27:39Z")
**V** elo bears – Trails will be closed until conclusion of the _Tour de Bruin_. _ **-“BB”-** _ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2023, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/182 "2023-07-23T23:48:02Z")
**W** est End Bears: Trails are opened, as this is the East End. ---
**Author:** ![penultima\_thule](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penultima_thule/32/3833_2.png) [@penultima\_thule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/penultima_thule)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2023, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/183 "2023-07-23T23:55:02Z")
**X** eric bears. Trails are open for the duration of the drought. Situation to be reassessed once the rains come. ---
**Author:** ![dirtball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dirtball/32/18772_2.png) [@dirtball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dirtball)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2023, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/184 "2023-07-24T00:33:42Z")
**Y** ippe-Ki-Yay bears - Trails open for the duration of a showing of _Die Hard_, which will keep them distracted. ---
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2023, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/185 "2023-07-24T00:54:08Z")
**Z** onked bears. Trail is closed today, as the bears had a pretty big night last night, so need a good rest. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2023, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/186 "2023-07-24T17:38:34Z")
**A** poplectic bears: Trails are closed while the bears lose their shit. ---
**Author:** ![penultima\_thule](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penultima_thule/32/3833_2.png) [@penultima\_thule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/penultima_thule)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2023, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/187 "2023-07-25T00:38:53Z")
**B** loodsoaked bears. Trails are closed to all hikers with immediate effect, like in Yellowstone. Too soon? ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2023, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/188 "2023-07-30T19:03:58Z")
Curmudgeon bears: Get off my trail! ---
**Author:** ![Bicycle\_Bill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bicycle_bill/32/6208_2.png) [@Bicycle\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bicycle_Bill)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2023, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/189 "2023-07-31T11:43:42Z")
**D** a Bears – Trails remain open. Nobody’s been worried about them for years. (Go Packers!!) _ **-“BB”-** _ ---
**Author:** ![SpoilerVirgin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4491bb/32.png) [@SpoilerVirgin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpoilerVirgin)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2023, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/190 "2023-07-31T13:53:34Z")
**E** legant bears. The trails remain open until they finish their tea and cucumber sandwiches. ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2023, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/191 "2023-07-31T14:38:11Z")
**F** ore bears. The trails are open, but let the ancestral critters play through. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2023, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/192 "2023-07-31T19:53:32Z")
**G** rizzly bears: The trail remains open. They’re quite normal. ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2023, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/193 "2023-07-31T20:15:21Z")
After you. No need to thank me. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2023, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/194 "2023-08-01T14:36:19Z")
**H** ippie bears: Trails are open, dude, like, don’t be a bummer. It’s, like, cool, man. ---
**Author:** ![gkster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gkster/32/14107_2.png) [@gkster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gkster)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2023, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/195 "2023-08-01T15:38:02Z")
Indecisive bears. Trail closed until bears settle down (BTW I was biking on a trail last week and thought I saw a big Rottweiler or black Lab ahead. And then a bigger creature emerged and I realized it was a bear cub followed by its mother) ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2023, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/196 "2023-08-01T16:13:38Z")
[![](https://www.stevevanderleest.com/fun/tragedy.jpg) ](https://www.stevevanderleest.com/fun/tragedy.jpg) Lucky you weren’t between them. ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2023, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/197 "2023-08-07T16:38:14Z")
**J** ubilant bears. They’re in a good mood, so trails remain open, but watch out in case their celebrations take them into your path. ---
**Author:** ![penultima\_thule](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penultima_thule/32/3833_2.png) [@penultima\_thule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/penultima_thule)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2023, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176/198 "2023-08-07T20:56:53Z")
**K** nackered bears. Would kill you if you got too close but are too tired to care. Trails are open until bears get their knackers back. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alphabetical-how-long-to-close-the-trail-because-of-bears/986176.md?page=9)