# Am I a Pedophile? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 13, 2001, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314 "2001-05-13T14:12:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/1 "2001-05-13T14:12:51Z")
30 year-old married, heterosexual male here. Whenever I chat on the internet, the adults bore me to tears. It’s all talk about divorces, kids, jobs, etc. Mostly kids; and since I don’t have any, I can’t relate. The teens, however, never fail to amuse me. Especially the teen girls. I **love** chatting with teen girls on the internet. It’s all innocent; I don’t cybersex them or ask them what color their panties are while I whack off. I just talk to them about life & such. They are so much more interesting than people my age. Especially the girl I met in Yahoo chat who is a total _Star Wars_ geek! An even bigger _Star Wars_ geek than me :eek:! So anyway, does all this make me a deve? Mrs. Rastahomie thinks it’s weird, but not immoral or illegal. I, however, have my doubts. DISCLAIMER: I get NO sexual pleasure from these conversations, as they are strictly conversations about mundane things. So am I a deve ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/2 "2001-05-13T14:46:26Z")
Sorry, but YES, its weird. You must make friedns your own age and give up your kinky voyeristic habit. Its weird man. The fact that you know its weird gives me hope… but stop now. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/3 "2001-05-13T15:25:37Z")
It’s all about finding your level. Your level is that of a teenage girl. Seriously though I know what you mean. At family gatherings I frequently go ‘hang with the kids’ to avoid all the talk of mortages and such so I don’t think there is anything wrong with you. ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/4 "2001-05-13T15:41:46Z")
A lot of those teenage girls aren’t teenage girls but guys your age probably pretending to be teenage girls. You could try hanging out in one of those Lesbian chat rooms, they have adult women who love to talk & stay on topic. You have to be real careful not to offend them though. ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/5 "2001-05-13T16:34:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kellibelli \* > \*\*Sorry, but YES, its weird. You must make friedns your own age and give up your kinky voyeristic habit. > > Its weird man. The fact that you know its weird gives me hope… but stop now. \*\* **rastahomie** , in your post, I noted no “kinky voyeristic” habit. I’ts kinda weird, but no big deal. As long as you’re not talking about anything sexual with them, it’s all good. ---
**Author:** ![Spoonbender](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spoonbender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoonbender)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/6 "2001-05-13T16:46:09Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by rastahomie_ > Whenever I chat on the internet, the adults bore me to tears. It’s all talk about divorces, kids, jobs, etc. Mostly kids; and since I don’t have any, I can’t relate. I’d say you’re probably looking in the wrong places to chat. There are plenty of adults out there who want to talk about interesting subjects and have a lot to say. There are billions of chat rooms out there; find one devoted to a subject you’re interested in. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/7 "2001-05-13T16:54:12Z")
If what you talk about is the same teenage girl “stuff” my daughter and her friends message each other about my eyes would start bleeding as my brain tried to batter it’s way out my skull if I was forced to interact in these scenarios, so no I don’t “get it”, but everyone’s different. In all honesty despite your declaration of only the purest of intentions, if my daughter told her that 30 year old man was chatting her and her frinds up on the net and was deeply into the things she cared about I would probably suspect that there was some sort ped vibe here even if it’s not overtly physical. But that’s just me. ---
**Author:** ![Mielikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Mielikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mielikki)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/8 "2001-05-13T17:08:49Z")
I don’t think it’s wrong. It’s sure weird, in the sense that it’s not in the norm, but that might not be a bad thing. Do you like to talk to teenage boys also? I also don’t have kids, and the last thing I want to do is talk about my job or my mortgage. That’s boring ol’ reality, and I get enough of it in mundane life. If I’m in front of the computer or the television, I want to be entertained. Some people are entertained by watching ‘Survivor’. You are apparently entertained by listening to what is undoubtedly the high drama of a teen’s life. Since plenty of TV shows revolve around this, it’s obviously entertaining. Shrug. If your wife’s OK with it, and you’re not misleading anyone (yourself included- you reeally ain’t getting off to this), then chat away. Although I agree with other posters in that you could probably find interesting adults to talk to if you looked in the right places. ---
**Author:** ![DAVEW0071](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e19b73/32.png) [@DAVEW0071](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DAVEW0071)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/9 "2001-05-13T18:09:59Z")
For shame, **kellibelli**. I think you’re jumping to conclusions. **Rasta** said he derived no sexual pleasure from his chats, he just preferred the topics and the refreshing way they communicate. Nothing wrong with that. My wife teaches third grade. Her closest colleague (also third grade) is a single man, in his 30s. He loves teaching grade school. He loves kids; he can appreciate their world and their point of view. He can communicate with them very well, and he’s a great teacher (and a wonderful friend to my family). He’s not sexually deviant. He just identifies with kids; totally innocent. I have a 16-year-old daughter. I like meeting her friends and chatting with them. It’s refreshing and fun for me. They like me. They’ve told my daughter they think her parents are cool. Is that weird and kinky? Or is it different because I meet them face-to-face and **rasta** chats with them on the internet? If their conversations are innocent and above-board, then I see nothing wrong with it. ---
**Author:** ![Minty\_Rae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/49beb7/32.png) [@Minty\_Rae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Minty_Rae)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/10 "2001-05-13T18:34:12Z")
It doesn’t seem weird at all to me. But then, I’m on the other end of this. I’m old enough to vote, but not drink, and the youngest person I talk to online is a decade older–and I’ve been talking to him since I was 15. ---
**Author:** ![Morrison\_s\_Lament](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Morrison\_s\_Lament](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morrison_s_Lament)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/11 "2001-05-13T18:52:23Z")
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you sexually, but your tolerance for the innane chatter of teenage girls I cannot even begin to understand. Good for you though, if it makes you happy! — G. Raven ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/12 "2001-05-13T18:58:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DAVEW0071 \* > I think you’re jumping to conclusions. **Rasta** said he derived no sexual pleasure from his chats, he just preferred the topics and the refreshing way they communicate. Nothing wrong with that. Isnt there? He himself posted the op asking if he was a pedophile… From the OP: **Mrs. Rastahomie thinks it’s weird, but not immoral or illegal. I, however, have my doubts.** > [@](#): > > My wife teaches third grade. Her closest colleague (also third grade) is a single man, in his 30s. He loves teaching grade school. He loves kids; he can appreciate their world and their point of view. He can communicate with them very well, and he’s a great teacher (and a wonderful friend to my family). He’s not sexually deviant. He just identifies with kids; totally innocent. I couldnt agree more. Thank god there are people like that in the world! > [@](#): > > I have a 16-year-old daughter. I like meeting her friends and chatting with them. It’s refreshing and fun for me. They like me. They’ve told my daughter they think her parents are cool. Is that weird and kinky? Or is it different because I meet them face-to-face and **rasta** chats with them on the internet? Rasta isnt meeting his daughters friends. Being involved with your kid is NOT the same as cruising the internet looking for young girls now is it? Rasta himself has doubts - doesnt that worry you? If he is shunning the company of adults in favor of teen girls, thats very creepy. Even if the conversations are totally innocent, it IS voyeristic in that he is getting a look into the life of a young girl just as if he was peeping in her window, and even though he says the CONVERSATIONS are totally innocent, I think he is getting a mental sexual thrill from it. Hey, he asked for input. I am not gonna lie to him. I have seen teen girls chat, and it was far from refreshing - it was incoherent babble punctuated with profanity and {{{{{{{{HUGZ!!!}}}}}}}} etc. Try #straightdope, I havent been there for ages, but it was a decent room last time I was there. ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/13 "2001-05-13T19:26:57Z")
My daughter is 14 and has several adult chat friends. I don’t have a problem with this. At first it was because the computer is in the living room and a casual glance while walking by gives you the idea of what they’re talking about, but I’ve heard her block people that were “creeping” her out or getting weird on her. She’s always gotten along better with adults than kids her age and on the net is no exception. I’ve even “met” her adult chat friends. There’s a difference between being a pedophile and just enjoying talking to teenagers. Now, teenage boys are a whole different matter. All they want to talk about is sex and trying to get some. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![oldscratch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ed655f/32.png) [@oldscratch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oldscratch)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/14 "2001-05-13T19:28:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zebra \* > \*\*It’s all about finding your level. Your level is that of a teenage girl. \*\* I’m sorry, but that is the funniest thing I’ve read all day. as for the OP, it’s odd. No doubt about it. But there are odder things that also aren’t illegal. So take that for what it’s worth. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/15 "2001-05-13T19:29:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Arden Ranger \* > **Now, teenage boys are a whole different matter. All they want to talk about is sex and trying to get some. :rolleyes:** Scuse me? ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/16 "2001-05-13T19:31:46Z")
Okay, the ones that try to talk to me when I have chat programs open are like that. No offense, **matt\_mcl**. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mercutio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@Mercutio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mercutio)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/17 "2001-05-13T19:38:56Z")
So, WhO’s ReAdY fOr BoObS aNd DrUgS aNd WoMeN aNd BlInK182!!! RoCk On!!! ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/18 "2001-05-13T20:09:40Z")
What about all the people here on SDMB who chat with their teenage friends? I’ve been here since I was 16, does that make everybody who emails me or chats with me some sort of sexual deviant, or voyer? ---
**Author:** ![Mercutio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@Mercutio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mercutio)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/19 "2001-05-13T20:19:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pepperlandgirl \* > **does that make everybody who emails me or chats with me some sort of sexual deviant, or voyer?** Yes, yes it does. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/20 "2001-05-13T20:24:45Z")
Hmm, that wasn’t a fair example since I make it a point to only talk to sexual deviants and voyers. 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314.md?page=2)