# Am I a Pedophile? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 13, 2001, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314 "2001-05-13T14:12:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Morrison\_s\_Lament](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Morrison\_s\_Lament](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morrison_s_Lament)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/21 "2001-05-13T20:25:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pepperlandgirl \* > \*\*What about all the people here on SDMB who chat with their teenage friends? I’ve been here since I was 16, does that make everybody who emails me or chats with me some sort of sexual deviant, or voyer? > \*\* Well, I can only speak for my self of course, but… Yes. 😃 — G. Raven ---
**Author:** ![Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/22 "2001-05-13T20:37:12Z")
Well, I find that a lot of people my age bore me to death too. I also find that I like to talk to teenage girls, from about 16-19. Difference is, I’m 14, not 30 :). ---
**Author:** ![Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/23 "2001-05-13T20:40:01Z")
Oh, and FTR, I may be a teenage boy, but _I am **not** obsessed with sex!!!_. And if I was looking for it on the net, I wouldn’t try it with girls that are 4 or 5 years older than me. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/24 "2001-05-13T20:42:19Z")
Yeah well I’m about sixteen and je suis une femme- would you like to IM me, Rasta? 🙂 I mean, I consider myself a pretty funny person to speak with online. You can IM me at FenchurchIV if you’d like. Satan liked talking with me, or so he seemed, at least awhile ago. And I used to talk to this other adult guy. But mostly its people my age or just people on this board. Speaker- would you like to try it with **guys** four or five years older? Hehehe…🆒 ---
**Author:** ![AwSnappity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a3d4f5/32.png) [@AwSnappity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AwSnappity)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/25 "2001-05-13T21:12:40Z")
I’d rather talk to adults online than people my own age (16). Why do you think I signed up for this message board, where the majority of the members are adults? I find that most of the teens I talk to are uneducated and boring. I hate being asked the same questions over and over again. Ick. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/26 "2001-05-13T22:32:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Arden Ranger \* > Now, teenage boys are a whole different matter. All they want to talk about is sex and trying to get some. :rolleyes: But . . . but . . . That was all you were willing to talk about! [serious mode]I wish people would stop saying that. Then maybe the rest of the world would quit believing it.[/serious mode] ---
**Author:** ![Balduran](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cc9497/32.png) [@Balduran](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balduran)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/27 "2001-05-13T22:46:04Z")
Ah, but **impunha** , half of us have done or will do that. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/28 "2001-05-13T23:08:48Z")
One time, at band camp… ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/29 "2001-05-13T23:33:15Z")
‘Teen’ means 18 & 19 too…perfectly legal & fun to talk to. You can go quite a bit lower in age in the US & marry one. They are okay to talk to; kinda boring for me. But if I was working with the Five Americans backstage I think it would be fun talking to the teen women in the backstage area. ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/30 "2001-05-13T23:39:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by iampunha \* > \*\* > But . . . but . . . > > That was all you were willing to talk about! > > [serious mode]I wish people would stop saying that. Then maybe the rest of the world would quit believing it.[/serious mode] \*\* No it wasn’t, **iampunha** , and you weren’t trying to get me to have cyber sex with you (or maybe you were just too subtle for me ;)). I did go back and say that the ones who tried to talk to me in chat programs were that way. Nothing like having a series conversation with a friend and having one of those windows pop up with a “S/W/M/17- do u cyber???” message that I have to take the time to block and interrupts my real conversatio and it happens alot whenever I’m on AIM. Now, on Yahoo for some reason I get these weird Turkish guys… ---
**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2001, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/31 "2001-05-13T23:52:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mercutio \* > \*\*So, WhO’s ReAdY fOr BoObS aNd DrUgS aNd WoMeN aNd BlInK182!!! > > RoCk On!!! \*\* **mErCuTiO** , yOu LiKe tOtAlLy BeAt Me To iT! tHiS iS SoOoOoOoOoOo KeWl. Actually, I can almost relate to the OP. Back in my early days on the internet, when I hadn’t discovered things like SDMB, I used to spend a lot of time in Yahoo Chat. I knew it was a crappy place at the time, but I used to put up with it because I hadn’t found anywhere else. I got really tired of the fact that nearly everyone seemed to be a teenage girl, but I tolerated that so that I could meet the occasional person who would be able to engage me in a reasonable conversation. Then I met my friend Saf in London for the first time: **Saf (in unsolicited Private Message):** Hi! a/s/l? **Me:** Hello. 28 [then], bloke, Sydney. **Saf:** 17/f/London… **Me:** OK [THINKS: Oh Kerrrr-EYE-stah! Another teenage girl. Beter just be polite, then I can bugger off]. Two and a bit years later, I can now say Saf is possibly my closest friend either IRL or on the net. She is a London-born Indian Muslim. Conservative, dux of her school, incredibly intelligent and mature. If she hadn’t told me her age, I’d have guessed her to be in her 30s or 40s. The conversation is something I look forward to each morning. Saf and I share everything with each other. This is the first time I can say I’ve had a friendship with a member of the oposite sex in which I _honestly_ like the fact that it’s platonic, and that there is no chance of it ever being otherwise. We’ve been there for each other through various personal crises. We chat nearly every day for an hour or two. She even calls me “Big Bro”! 🙂 And she plays a wicked game of Scrabble. This is the beauty of the internet. It brings us all down to the same starting point. If I had met Saf originally in person, I probably would never have struck up a friendship with her. My online friends: [li] 19 year old Muslim girl in London[/li][li] 19 year old Muslim **guy** in London(her ex-boyfriend)[/li][li] 24 y.o. Buddhist girl from Hong Kong (we had a net romance though 🙂 )[/li][li] 25 y.o. outrageously camp Danish gay guy.[/li][li] 49 y.o. female teacher from here in Australia.[/li][li] and plenty more equally diverse ones…[/li][/list] To the OP, enjoy talking to anybody you wish to online. Talk to teenagers, but just be very careful about it. It’s not only what you do, but what you are seen to do. ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/32 "2001-05-14T00:21:35Z")
Want my opinion? Not at all. I have _never_ understood the mentality that talking to (or being interested in general) any particular age is a sign of anything other than mutual compatibility. **Speaker for the Dead** said the following: > [@](#): > > I also find that I like to talk to teenage girls, from about 16-19. Difference is, I’m 14, not 30 🙂 Why should this change automatically just because you hit a birthday (and at what birthday do you magically transform from a normal person into a pervert)? Ageism baffles the hell out of me. I’ve met and enjoyed the company of people of all ages, from six to sixty. Never did their age prevent or cause that interest; compatibility did. Every point along the development spectrum has its own merits. Don’t stress it. (Oh, and here’s a shock for all the morality police out there: teenagers talk about sex, too! They could probably benefit from the experience and wisdom of an adult perspective. Too bad you’ve made it practically illegal for us to discuss it with them, eh? Good move on your part, whilst you’re bemoaning the adverse consequences of their naivete.) _Originally posted by **kellibelli:** _ > [@](#): > > Sorry, but YES, its weird. You must make friedns your own age and give up your kinky voyeristic habit. > > Its weird man. The fact that you know its weird gives me hope… but stop now. No offense intended, **kelli,** but where do you get off passing judgment like this? Not to mention handing down the orders? I’m hoping this post was tongue-in-cheek, but your second makes me wonder. Are we all obligated to follow _your_ rules, now? What about everybody else’s point of view? Are those of us who disagree with you being kindly invited to piss off because our point of view isn’t as important as yours? Honestly wondering. ---
**Author:** ![Carina42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Carina42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carina42)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/33 "2001-05-14T00:36:34Z")
Rasta…it’s weird, if you find teenage girls more interesting than adults to talk to online then I do think you are not a very well balanced person. Especially if you “ **love** ” (your bolding) chatting with them “about mundane things” because the adults “bore you to tears.” Am I the only one who finds this an odd juxtaposition? An adult male who would rather talk about mundane & amusing things with teenage girls than mundane & apparently unamusing things with adults? :rolleyes: Not that there’s anything wrong with chatting with teenegers, or anyone else not in your peer group. I find teenagers often interesting & fun to talk to; I’m sure many grownups do. Your wife’s attitude is pretty strange, too. Good lord, if I had a husband who prefered chatting with 15 years old girls online because he found grownups boring, I’m not sure how long I would stick around, but it would not be long, that’s for sure. What a freaking insult to your wife! (unless of course she is 16, or that mental age.) If I was planning on having children, I think I would want someone who _didn’t_ find grownup things tedious for a father. I would want to be a wife & a mother, not a mother & a mother. It is reassuring, though, that you feel it necessary to reiterate more than once that it’s innocent, you don’t whack off, you don’t ask their panty colour, you get no sexual charge, you don’t cybersex,etc etc. All in a few paragraphs. Oh, and good you pointed out you are a heterosexual male. Phew. I was starting to wonder. In short, my friend, IMNSHO, I believe you are lying either to yourself, or to the teeming millions. ---
**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/34 "2001-05-14T00:53:17Z")
> [@](#): > > But if I was working with the Five Americans backstage I think it would be fun talking to the teen women in the backstage area. handy you dog you… ---
**Author:** ![sk8rixtx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@sk8rixtx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sk8rixtx)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/35 "2001-05-14T00:56:37Z")
I’m 16, what if I engaged regularly in conversation with someone older, but instead of 30 or 40, try 87? Are you really going to think that she’s a perv? I mean c’mon, she’s older right? What makes Edna any different? ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/36 "2001-05-14T01:00:39Z")
Wow, people sure do jump to conclusions quickly, don’t they? Rasta, there’s nothing wrong with it if your intentions are as you state them to be. Nothing at all. ---
**Author:** ![Carina42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Carina42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carina42)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/37 "2001-05-14T01:21:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > \*\*Wow, people sure do jump to conclusions quickly, don’t they? > > Rasta, there’s nothing wrong with it if your intentions are as you state them to be. Nothing at all. \*\* True, Coldie…Some of us did not really keep to the _spirit_ of the OP. But the word “pedophile” is sort of like a red flag to a bull for many people, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/38 "2001-05-14T02:17:54Z")
> [@](#): > > **Am I a Pedophile?** No. And the people that think you are creep me out. Guys, he’s just TALKING to them. Should people just have signs now, like the ones that say “No sale of tobacco to people born after this day, 1983”?? I think I’ll change my sig to say “No interaction with people born after this day, 1983”. :rolleyes: God that’s pathetic. Rasta, there’s NOTHING wrong with having a conversation with a minor of any gender, no matter how old you are or what gender/sexual orientation you might be of, as long as you’re not entertaining the idea of sexual contact with said minors, and I don’t personally believe you are. ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/39 "2001-05-14T02:34:27Z")
I disagree, Silver Fire. Being 30 and wanting to talk to teenage girls _in exclusion to other people of other age groups_ is odd. And that’s the implication I draw from the OP. Not necessarily pedophilic, but certainly contains a tinge of creepiness. astro nailed it: > [@](#): > > \*\*If what you talk about is the same teenage girl “stuff” my daughter and her friends message each other about my eyes would start bleeding as my brain tried to batter it’s way out my skull if I was forced to interact in these scenarios \*\* ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314/40 "2001-05-14T02:51:07Z")
Milo, I don’t like talking to people in my age group. I can’t be too sure about you people (meaning every single person I’ve ever interacted with online), because I don’t know ALL your ages, but IRL the youngest person I talk to on a regular basis is 4 years my senior. Not such a big deal until you consider this - the oldest man I ever dated was almost 11 years older than me. I’ve been like this (excluding the part about dating men a decade ahead of me) since I was 12, hanging out with my older brother (he’s 4 years older than me) and all his friends. I also don’t like girls. They’re bitchy and high strung and unpredictable and… bitchy. I like guys. More than 90% of my friends are guys. This has earned me the slut label, a label that is unfair and unproven (because it is, of course, untrue) and really hurtful to me. It’s not right that people draw the conclusion that I’m easy just because my friends happen to be older men. I don’t like people thinking that the only reason I talk to guys is because I’m fucking them, or because I want to fuck them. I stand by my original post. There’s NOTHING wrong with it at all. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-a-pedophile/65314.md?page=3)