# Am I missing some aspect of the Try Guys/Ned Fulmer scandal? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 4, 2022, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723 "2022-10-04T21:21:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/61 "2022-10-09T15:57:14Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > It’s not about whether we like your reaction. It’s about how that reaction seems to lead you to not understanding why they reacted this way. You apparently think of cheating as being a “legal, consensual relationship.” But the whole concept of cheating is that the spouse (or other partner) doesn’t consent. That’s literally what makes it wrong. Are you married to Ned Fulmer? I fully understand that what Ned Fulmer did to his wife Ariel is very wrong. And I understand why she is entitled to be outraged at what he did to her. But I’m having a harder time understanding the vicarious outrage I am seeing here. Ned Fulmer didn’t cheat on Eugene, Keith, and Zack. He didn’t cheat on the company and its employees. And he didn’t cheat on the people who watch their channel. I’ve worked with people who were caught cheating on their spouses. But none of them lost their jobs over it. I understand that there’s a different standard when a public figure is involved. but I’m still surprised at how much anger there is. We’ve had people cheat on their spouses and get elected President. Do we really have a higher standard for YouTube celebrities? ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/62 "2022-10-09T16:06:15Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Ned Fulmer didn’t cheat on Eugene, Keith, and Zack. He didn’t cheat on the company and its employees. And he didn’t cheat on the people who watch their channel. The people involved don’t feel this way. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/63 "2022-10-09T16:19:23Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > The people involved don’t feel this way. Can you explain why? Because otherwise, we’re just saying Fulmer’s actions were outrageous because people feel outraged by them. And the same actions by other people weren’t outrageous because people weren’t outraged by them. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/64 "2022-10-09T16:22:50Z")
Would you play poker with someone that you know cheats others at cards, as long as they promise they would never cheat with you? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/65 "2022-10-09T16:35:00Z")
No, I wouldn’t. But that doesn’t explain why people are singling out this one particular poker player while still playing cards with all the other cheaters. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/66 "2022-10-09T16:39:10Z")
Are you saying that they are all cheating on their wives? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/67 "2022-10-09T16:41:45Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > Are you saying that they are all cheating on their wives? I don’t know where you’re going with this. Who are “they”? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/68 "2022-10-09T16:43:15Z")
But to attempt to answer your question, I’ve posted about how there are numerous examples of other public figures who have cheated on their spouses without it ending their careers. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/69 "2022-10-09T16:50:40Z")
Ned cheating on his wife is like Lance Armstrong cheating at bike races, that WAS his career. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/70 "2022-10-09T16:51:39Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > I don’t know where you’re going with this. Who are “they”? “They” is the people of honor in this thread. The people that you were just talking about. I’m not sure who else you could be thinking about. > [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > But to attempt to answer your question, I’ve posted about how there are numerous examples of other public figures who have cheated on their spouses without it ending their careers. I don’t see how those examples are relevant to this context. He betrayed his friends and colleagues, and they don’t want to work with him anymore. He also portrayed himself as a wholesome family man, and betrayed that image to his fans, destroying his marketability. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/71 "2022-10-09T16:52:37Z")
> [@DigitalC](#): > > Ned cheating on his wife is like Lance Armstrong cheating at bike races, that WAS his career. That was much more pithy than my many failed and ultimately discarded attempts at making a sports doping metaphor, thank you. ---
**Author:** ![N9IWP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/n9iwp/32/3154_2.png) [@N9IWP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/N9IWP)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/72 "2022-10-09T16:55:28Z")
Hey, now I know the origin of the SNL skit… Brian ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/73 "2022-10-09T17:09:45Z")
A similar (but worse) incident happened at the Irish Try channel, which in many ways is a mirror of the Try Guys. It was started by former employees of FACTS, which was basically a stripped-down Irish Buzzfeed and has a basically identical reaction format. But while the owners do participate in videos from time to time, they have a mostly different model of rotating regulars reactors pulled from a pool. When one of the very long time regulars was credibly accused of sexual manipulation/abuse (and quickly admitted to at least some of it), they quietly acknowledged the issue on Twitter and said he would no longer be appearing. But of course the qualitative difference is substantial - though the offender was not charged with a crime (to my understanding), the offense was far worse and this was functionally a part-time employee, even if a long-term and mildly popular one, not an owner. I can absolutely see where an owner/participator needed a far firmer and more direct addressing of the problem. ---
**Author:** ![Skypist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skypist/32/169_2.png) [@Skypist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skypist)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/74 "2022-10-09T17:11:03Z")
I think it’s mostly the legal ramifications of Ned having an affair with an employee whose job he had a certain amount of power over. Even if the employee was willing, we don’t really know that. It doesn’t look good and could definitely open the company up to legal ramifications. But yeah, Ned seems like a total scumbag, too, so I don’t blame the other Try Guys for wanting him out. He lied to them, too. They and their partners were friends with his wife. If he continues that behavior, and they know about it and do nothing, what does that say about them and the kind of workplace environment they foster? ETA: I am a casual Try Guys fan and didn’t hear about this until several days after Reddit was already abuzz with the news. I’m glad they took a workplace, boss/employee affair seriously. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/75 "2022-10-09T19:31:57Z")
Yeah, I hadn’t heard of any of this until last night’s SNL skit. I felt old, and at the same time somehow relieved that I hadn’t heard of any of this dramatic nonsense until then. I mean, is it just me or are the internet scandals of the past 5-10 years just somehow more _dramatic_ than they warrant? Gamergate, this Try Guys business, PewDiePie, etc… I guess it’s because they’re social media controversies ON social media platforms, but they just seem to really hit my “tempest in a teapot” meter hard. Who actually cares if this guy cheated on his wife, other than the people directly involved in this? I know I sure don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/76 "2022-10-09T22:40:21Z")
I, too, think that any adult would not get so freaking dramatic about one of their co-workers and friends cheating at work. But this show of anger and disappointment isn’t for me or you, it’s for their base. This is how you are _supposed_ to react when this happens. Anything less than extreme anger and sadness would be an underreaction-- as witnessed here by people who don’t understand why other people see this as an overreaction. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2022, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/77 "2022-10-09T23:30:04Z")
I was only vague aware that there were youtube shows, and not aware of this one at all. From reading this thread, I get why they wanted him off the show, and I even get them publicly making a big deal of wanting him off the show for appearances. And I get why others can’t understand why people were so worked up. In summary, I understand everything that’s happening, even though I know nothing about it. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2022, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/78 "2022-10-10T01:00:19Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > Are you saying that they are all cheating on their wives? > [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > I don’t know where you’re going with this. Who are “they”? > [@k9bfriender](#): > > “They” is the people of honor in this thread. The people that you were just talking about. I’m not sure who else you could be thinking about. So the people of honor in this thread are cheating on their wives? Honestly, I have no idea what point you’re trying to make. You are wrong when you say that I am talking about anyone who is here in this thread. Let me clarify once again, that I’m talking about public figures. And I’m assuming that nobody participating in this thread is a public figure so this thread has nothing directly to do with anyone here. We are all outsiders watching this unfold. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2022, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/79 "2022-10-10T01:08:12Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > > [@DigitalC](#): > > > > Ned cheating on his wife is like Lance Armstrong cheating at bike races, that WAS his career. > > That was much more pithy than my many failed and ultimately discarded attempts at making a sports doping metaphor, thank you. Agreed, thank you. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2022, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723/80 "2022-10-10T01:10:46Z")
> [@bump](#): > > I mean, is it just me or are the internet scandals of the past 5-10 years just somehow more _dramatic_ than they warrant? Gamergate, I don’t want to hijack this thread, so I’ll just say this: Gamergate involved sexist pigs trying to put women back in the kitchen where they belonged, not competing for real jobs held by real men. It was nasty and cruel. I don’t think it was in any way overblown. And that’s all I’ll say. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-missing-some-aspect-of-the-try-guys-ned-fulmer-scandal/972723.md?page=5)