# Am I not welcome here? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 29, 2015, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149 "2015-05-29T21:50:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2015, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/41 "2015-05-29T23:51:23Z")
Man who wants to live in a friendly place? Friendly = either nosy, or fake friendliness with manipulation behind it. Small communities known for being friendly are usually hellholes of minding everyone else’s business. ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2015, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/42 "2015-05-29T23:52:38Z")
Look on the bright side–you only got one warning so far for trolling. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2015, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/43 "2015-05-29T23:55:39Z")
I don’t know you from Adam, but all I’ve got to say is that, for some people, the definition of bullying has been diluted so, that it’s completely lost all its meaning. ---
**Author:** ![Truman\_Burbank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@Truman\_Burbank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truman_Burbank)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2015, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/44 "2015-05-29T23:57:29Z")
Oh, as I read some excerpts from your posting, I have a suggestion. Overgeneralization is a very irritating and ignorant habit, and will get you a lot of (well-deserved) grief here. ---
**Author:** ![protoboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/fbc32d/32.png) [@protoboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/protoboard)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/45 "2015-05-30T00:01:07Z")
> [@Truman\_Burbank](#): > > Oh, as I read some excerpts from your posting, I have a suggestion. Overgeneralization is a very irritating and ignorant habit, and will get you a lot of (well-deserved) grief here. Sometimes generalizations are useful though, and I usually provide a caveat and say not EVERYONE is like that, etc, just so the PC police here don’t jump on me. And to the person who said I was trolling - trolling is in the eye of the beholder. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/46 "2015-05-30T00:01:37Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > Okay that statement about Jews was pretty uncalled for. Completely uncalled for. > [@](#): > > I must have been drunk or something. I’m going to go with _something_,that something being stupid and bigoted. > [@](#): > > I don’t have an anti-Semitic bone in my body. Bullshit. > [@](#): > > I totally relate to how they feel for being treated like shit for absolutely no reason for all of history… More bullshit. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/47 "2015-05-30T00:04:43Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > BTW that’s another thing I dislike about the PNW. People here are generally privately bigoted as hell, but if you say one offensive thing they will treat you like you are a murderer forever. There is absolutely no concept of forgiveness here. I notice it with friendships too - one fight and it’s over. Refresh my memory; where were you from before you moved to the Pacific Northwest, where people were so easy going and forgiving of all your character flaws? ---
**Author:** ![Truman\_Burbank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@Truman\_Burbank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truman_Burbank)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/48 "2015-05-30T00:06:11Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > Sometimes generalizations are useful though, and I usually provide a caveat and say not EVERYONE is like that, etc, just so the PC police here don’t jump on me. > > And to the person who said I was trolling - trolling is in the eye of the beholder. You are welcome. And now we see what you do with potentially helpful feedback inviting you to exam yourself. The caveat isn’t for warding off the PC police, you dunce, it’s to _check yourself_. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/49 "2015-05-30T00:07:21Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > I’m an atheist myself, but a part of me feels like America’s sense of Christian forgiveness (regardless of the flaws like being so anti-gay) is the only thing that prevents us from becoming a full-on warzone. Actually, Christian forgiveness is generally perceived as kind of un-American. This nation was founded largely by hardass Calvinist types (sometimes overlaid with a veneer of rational-deist classical Stoicism), and cherishing our grudges is extremely important to us as a people. [QUOTE=protoboard] I understand you guys being annoyed by me. I admit, I can be a bit of a bitch. Isn’t everyone sometimes? What I don’t understand is why it’s considered more acceptable and forgivable to be downright **mean** on these forums. [/QUOTE] It’s just the house style. Our general tone of condescending snarkasm and recreational invective has been passed down to us from the sayings of our Perfect Master. You certainly don’t have to like it, but you ain’t likely to change it. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/50 "2015-05-30T00:08:36Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > Do you think it’s better to be a bully than to be a whiner? I try to be neither. You should do the same. > [@](#): > > BTW, you can find my age if you read my posts, but I’m not as young as you might think. Haven’t read any of your posts and never heard of you before this thread, but if all you do is kvetch I will make a point of avoiding you. > [@protoboard](#): > > Honestly, sometimes I was confused as to where certain threads belonged. I really don’t think it’s a big deal and it’s not a good reason to be hostile and cruel to me, IMO. Don’t you agree? I will try to find the right boards better from now on. Posting to the wrong boards means our mods, who work for free, have to clean up your messes. One time they’ll forgive. More than one makes you a major pain in the ass. > [@samclem](#): > > Look on the bright side–you only got one warning so far for trolling. The night is still young. ---
**Author:** ![protoboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/fbc32d/32.png) [@protoboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/protoboard)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/51 "2015-05-30T00:11:58Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Actually, Christian forgiveness is generally perceived as kind of un-American. This nation was founded largely by hardass Calvinist types (sometimes overlaid with a veneer of rational-deist classical Stoicism), and cherishing our grudges is extremely important to us as a people. Good point. Even the atheists here – hell, maybe ESPECIALLY the atheists, have a very Calvinistic and hardass attitude in this country. In America the only path towards acceptance and forgiveness of your faults is success. Even someone like Bill Cosby, who is a serial rapist is more accepted here than a kind hearted homeless person because Americans love a “winner” and hate a “loser”. And they hate nothing more than a **sore** loser. I personally think our priorities are completely out of whack but you are right, there is really nothing I can do to change it on an individual level. I just wish I could leave this country honestly. Even my family has that same Calvinist hardass attitude to the point that I don’t feel comfortable around them. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/52 "2015-05-30T00:15:01Z")
**protoboard** , feel free to ping me if you want to visit some of the most open, caring, and friendly locations in Portland. I guarantee I can find you people who will treat you well. Admittedly, some of those places require having a ready supply of singles handy. But not all. ETA: There are a ton of nonprofits and charity orginizations that would love your volunteer hours to help make Portland, Oregon, and the US better places to live. Happy to hook you up with some. . ---
**Author:** ![protoboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/fbc32d/32.png) [@protoboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/protoboard)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/53 "2015-05-30T00:15:06Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > I try to be neither. You should do the same. > Haven’t read any of your posts and never heard of you before this thread, but if all you do is kvetch I will make a point of avoiding you. > Posting to the wrong boards means our mods, who work for free, have to clean up your messes. One time they’ll forgive. More than one makes you a major pain in the ass. > The night is still young. Well don’t you seem like a joy. I’d hate to accidentally cut you off on the road or something. You’d probably stab me or something. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/54 "2015-05-30T00:15:23Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > Sometimes generalizations are useful though, and I usually provide a caveat and say not EVERYONE is like that, etc, just so the PC police here don’t jump on me. > > And to the person who said I was trolling - trolling is in the eye of the beholder. That beholder happens to be one of the moderators on this site. It’s their eyes that count for determining if you’re trolling. ---
**Author:** ![protoboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/fbc32d/32.png) [@protoboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/protoboard)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/55 "2015-05-30T00:16:56Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > That beholder happens to be one of the moderators on this site. It’s their eyes that count for determining if you’re trolling. Honestly I wouldn’t care if I was blocked. It’s obvious nobody wants me here anyway. They can go ahead if it makes them feel righteous. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/56 "2015-05-30T00:22:25Z")
> [@Robert163](#): > > I’ve been here a little over a year/year and a half, maybe two, and I feel like I don’t know anyone and that most people dislike me. I didn’t really remember you either but when I checked your name to see the threads you had started I liked most of the threads. So says the admitted troll. ---
**Author:** ![Truman\_Burbank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@Truman\_Burbank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truman_Burbank)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/57 "2015-05-30T00:24:19Z")
have you noticed that for every piece of feedback you’ve been given, you make an excuse? And are you now shooting for 'suicide by mod"? Let me go microwave the popcorn. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/58 "2015-05-30T00:26:47Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > Well don’t you seem like a joy. I’d hate to accidentally cut you off on the road or something. You’d probably stab me or something. What? He’s a Doper. He’d go home and open a self-serving Pit thread about it, of course. You know, kind of like you’re doing. BTW, I don’t hate you in the slightest, but you’re coming off here like the love child of Eeyore and Droopy, and that’s not a good look for you. ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/59 "2015-05-30T00:33:45Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > It’s obvious nobody wants me here anyway. See, you need to stop doing that. It comes off as incredibly juvenile. 90% of the posters here almost certainly have no idea who you are, because NOBODY reads every thread on this board and you just aren’t that prolific ( yet ). I find your anti-WC obsession mildly annoying because, well, you are obsessive about it and your arguments are IMHO weak and more to the point stubbornly and aggravatingly repetitive. But I can easily think of 50 or 100 posters more annoying than you and I don’t want to wish them into the cornfield either. Heck you’re not even as irritating as that Indian guy who was constantly making threads wondering why all the hot white women wouldn’t date him and _he_ didn’t bother me all that much. The vast majority of people here don’t give a rat’s ass about you. Positive or negative. If ALL you do or MOST of what you or an AWFUL LOT of what do is whine and vent, your interactions here will be negative. Keep the whining and venting to a small percentage of your posts, try to frame them a little more constructively and your time here may be more pleasant. Or maybe not. Maybe this board is your West Coast of the internet. But despite all the anti-social gits and pissy gadflies on this board ( and most others ) most of how you are perceived is on you. ---
**Author:** ![Aquadementia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aquadementia/32/555_2.png) [@Aquadementia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aquadementia)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2015, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149/60 "2015-05-30T00:35:43Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > No but I’ve met little but hostility on this forum, for my “rant” topics. Especially the one about Portland, people there sure can’t stand it if you don’t think their precious city is the bees knees in absolutely every single way. > > Of course, considering the sacrifices in comfort you have to make to live there you BETTER think it’s the bees knees if you wanna justify living there. 😃 Posts like this, and many others, where you can’t resist adding a little extra FU just might be why you’re getting a lot of static. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-not-welcome-here/721149.md?page=4)