# Am I really missing anything? \[using social media\] **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 17, 2016, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843 "2016-10-17T15:02:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2016, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/41 "2016-10-17T22:02:24Z")
> [@erysichthon](#): > > [ul] > [li]Lists of stupid “lifehacks” (“Turn a toilet paper tube into an iPhone speaker!”)[/li][/ul] Eh, I’ve heard worse. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2016, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/42 "2016-10-17T22:19:21Z")
One very important point about smartphones: You don’t have to use all of the features if you don’t want to. If you want, you can just use it as a phone. But you can also use it as a camera, as a quick way to jot down some notes, to read books or play games on when you find yourself with some time to kill in a place away from your usual amusements, to get directions when you get lost while traveling, to play music you like, to listen to the radio, and so on. Now, maybe some of those don’t appeal to you, for instance if you don’t have any reason to travel outside the area you’re familiar with. That’s fine, don’t use that feature. But no matter what it is you’re interested in, there will probably be several different smartphone tools that you would find useful, and it’s convenient to have all of those tools in a single device that fits in your pocket. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2016, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/43 "2016-10-17T22:41:02Z")
> [@Oddball\_92](#): > > As far as “fully participating in modern life”. Thanks for the reply but I really had to chuckle at that one. I am 60+ years old. I do not want “modern life”. I want old school life. I’m fully on board with this. \*Wait a minute! \*Did I just “like” something? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2016, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/44 "2016-10-17T23:22:03Z")
> [@Leo\_Krupe](#): > > Truth be told, the problem I really have with people isn’t the technology so much, as they think whatever is current is the greatest of all time. it’s true with sports stars (do people still think Mike Tyson was the greatest?), and with technology. Personally, I think the Second Industrial Revolution was far more impressive than smartphones and iwatches and Facebook. That was when technology really soared: within a couple of generations, the internal combustion engine came about, as well as the telephone, home electricity, radio, the airplane, the automobile, modern medicine, etc. But it is irrefutable that we are never going to go back to the “old way” of obtaining information barring some apocalyptical alteration of society. If my boss asks me a question and I tell him I’ve got to do some research before giving him an answer, he is going to look at me sideways if he finds me poring over dusty tomes in the library. He is going to expect an answer at least within a couple of hours. And that’s because the available technology sets the standards we are held to. Maybe the answer I get from the library is more reliable. But if the bosses want answers right now, that doesn’t matter. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that my coworkers who refuse to get smartphones tend to be the same ones who come to me with questions that can easily be solved with a few minutes on Google. They think they are just “old school”. But I think people who openly embrace “old school” thinking are essentially announcing how much they want to retire. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/45 "2016-10-18T00:33:49Z")
> [@Oddball\_92](#): > > As far as “fully participating in modern life”. Thanks for the reply but I really had to chuckle at that one. I am 60+ years old. I do not want “modern life”. I want old school life. I’m 71, and understand your sentiments completely. But I just got an iPhone, primarily to carry it around with me in case of an emergency … and at my age, an emergency can happen at any time. Remember “I’ve fallen and can’t get up”? Or I can call for help if my car breaks down. But now that I have it, I’m constantly discovering wonderful and amazing things to do with it. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/46 "2016-10-18T00:37:08Z")
> [@Oddball\_92](#): > > I am in the phone book if they want to call. Haven’t had/needed/used a phone book in what, 15 years? ETA: yeah, I find numbers online all the time. But the idea of a “phone book” threw me there. ---
**Author:** ![Sarahfeena](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarahfeena/32/519_2.png) [@Sarahfeena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarahfeena)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/47 "2016-10-18T01:10:27Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > This is exactly why I’m terrified of Facebook. > > If I join, they’ll notify-without my permission-- everyone I have ever emailed, sending them an innocent-sounding message like “Good news! Chappachula is now on Facebook-- click here to send him a friend request.” > But to me, this is NOT an innocent little thing. I absolutely, positively don’t want to involve these people from work in my private life. > > Yet my co-workers will see my name, send me a friend request, and naturally expect me to respond by friending them back. > > So when Facebook sends me their request, I’ll have to ignore it, or worse–reject it. And then they might feel _very_ insulted. > And if my co-workers and supervisors feel that I have deliberately insulted them—that could affect office politics in a way which could ruin my career, or even get me fired. > > For me, Facebook is more likely to ruin my life than improve it. > Yeah,it would be a nice feeling to have Facebook and see a few pics from people I’ve lost touch with. > But it would NOT be a nice feeling to have Facebook cause me to lose my job. 1. Create an email account that you only use for FB 2. Don’t tell FB where you work 3. Problem solved ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/48 "2016-10-18T01:23:06Z")
> [@Oddball\_92](#): > > s far as reconnecting with old friends… I am in the phone book if they want to call. Very few people even use a phone book nowadays. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I even got one. (I think we just threw it in the recycling bin) > [@](#): > > As far as “fully participating in modern life”. Thanks for the reply but I really had to chuckle at that one. I am 60+ years old. I do not want “modern life”. I want old school life. And I want a pony. What’s your point? ---
**Author:** ![Oddball\_92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b3f665/32.png) [@Oddball\_92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oddball_92)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/49 "2016-10-18T02:32:59Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Haven’t had/needed/used a phone book in what, 15 years? > > ETA: yeah, I find numbers online all the time. But the idea of a “phone book” threw me there. My point there is that if someone wants to contact me, they can find me without me having to be on Facebook or any other social media. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/50 "2016-10-18T04:40:11Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > This is exactly why I’m terrified of Facebook. > > If I join, they’ll notify-without my permission-- everyone I have ever emailed, sending them an innocent-sounding message like “Good news! Chappachula is now on Facebook-- click here to send him a friend request.” > But to me, this is NOT an innocent little thing. I absolutely, positively don’t want to involve these people from work in my private life. > > Yet my co-workers will see my name, send me a friend request, and naturally expect me to respond by friending them back. > > So when Facebook sends me their request, I’ll have to ignore it, or worse–reject it. And then they might feel _very_ insulted. > And if my co-workers and supervisors feel that I have deliberately insulted them—that could affect office politics in a way which could ruin my career, or even get me fired. > > For me, Facebook is more likely to ruin my life than improve it. > Yeah,it would be a nice feeling to have Facebook and see a few pics from people I’ve lost touch with. > But it would NOT be a nice feeling to have Facebook cause me to lose my job. This is completely false. Facebook will not trawl your email inbox and send a friend invite to everyone you’ve ever emailed. What makes you think this will happen? You may be thinking of Linkedin, which when you sign up famously asks if they can send an invite to your email contacts list. But they can’t do that unless you click “yes” when they ask if they can do that. Facebook doesn’t do that. ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/51 "2016-10-18T05:44:29Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > This is completely false. Facebook will not trawl your email inbox and send a friend invite to everyone you’ve ever emailed. **What makes you think this will happen?** Facebook did this to me about 5 or 6 years ago. It scared me so much that I closed the window immediately and ran away. I was curious, and had gone to Facebook and started the process of registration, not really sure what I was doing. Before I had gone very far (I think I was still on the first step of the process), it gave me a welcome message that said “here are some people you might want to friend”–about 50 names. The list included everybody in my email contacts, and a whole lot more–including the newborn grandson of a woman I sometimes email. Let’s call her Debbie. Now, Debbie is a typical grandmother, and I assume that she follows her family and the newborn baby on Fbook. I have zero contact with Debbie’s family (i.e.the baby’s parents), and didn’t even know the baby had been born. Yet Facebook wanted to connect me with the baby, who has his own Fbook page. Presumably, if I had actually completed the registration process , Fbook would notify the baby that I am now available to be friended. After all, that’s why Fbook exists. Now, if the baby decided to friend me, that might be cute. I could accept or not, and he wouldn’t be insulted. But if the baby happened to be one of my co-workers, that would _NOT_ be cute. If I refuse him , and he feels insulted, it could be disasterous to me. ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/52 "2016-10-18T07:47:54Z")
You are only missing something if you \*feel \*that you are missing something. The social media aspect of the modern world is not necessarily a good thing and causes at least as many headaches as it solves. In any case the headaches that it does “solve” aren’t headaches that everyone has. The thought of being involved in social media to any extent fills me with horror. I can’t imagine anything worse that being connected 24/7 to friends and family and being subjected to a “push” of bullshit. If I want to speak with them then I speak with them or physically interact with them. I’ve never been in a situation that social media can solve or improve but have certainly been in plenty where it could only make things worse. And, full disclosure, I am of the age that grew up at the first dawning of true tech, home computing and gaming. Cutting my teeth on ZX81 and Spectrums. Many happy hours striving to become “Elite”, early adopter of tech in many. many forms. I’m no luddite but then social media is not a technological phenomena as much as a cultural one (enabled by technology) and like many cultural developments it holds no charms for me. You may be the same. Smartphones are a different beast, they are merely the logical endpoint of the convergence of laptop and communication devices and would be useful even if social media never existed. ---
**Author:** ![Martini\_Enfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/martini_enfield/32/11123_2.png) [@Martini\_Enfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martini_Enfield)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/53 "2016-10-18T08:06:54Z")
> [@erysichthon](#): > > What are you missing if you don’t have Facebook? I’ll summarize it for you. > > [ul] > [li]Graphics with inspirational quotes against nature backgrounds[/li][li]Invitations to play Candy Crush[/li][li]“Let’s see who’s brave enough to repost this”[/li][li]“‘Like’ if you want to find a cure for cancer”[/li][li]Inane, bogus trivia (“This is the first month in 823 years that has five Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays!”)[/li][li]Variations of “Keep Calm and \_\_\_\_\_\_\_”[/li][li]Pictures of food at restaurants[/li][li]People who think _Onion_ fake news is real[/li][li]Vaguebooking (“Sometimes I just want to give up” without elaboration)[/li][li]Nutrition woo (“Apples cure diabetes!”)[/li][li]Upworthy clickbait videos[/li][li]Selfies taken inside cars[/li][li]“Which \_\_\_\_\_\_ Character Are You” quizzes[/li][li]Lists of stupid “lifehacks” (“Turn a toilet paper tube into an iPhone speaker!”)[/li][li]Astrology text graphics (“Betray a Scorpio and prepare for World War III!”)[/li][li]Minute-by-minute vacation updates (“I’m in the security line at the airport!”)[/li][li]Marital advice from newlyweds (“Communication is key!”)[/li][li]Discovering that you have friends with repulsive political and social opinions[/li][/ul] For what it’s worth, the fact this accurately describes so much of Facebook now is partly why there’s a not insignificant movement away from it. For years, I was the weird outlier amongst people I knew - the guy who didn’t have Facebook. Now lots of people I know have left the platform, or only keep it to stay vaguely in touch with Aunt Mavis who lives in Port Augusta. So now Zoidberg is the popular one! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/54 "2016-10-18T10:55:00Z")
> [@Oddball\_92](#): > > My point there is that if someone wants to contact me, they can find me without me having to be on Facebook or any other social media. I may not be typical, but if I’m trying to find someone Facebook is the first (and often only) place I look. ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/55 "2016-10-18T11:19:41Z")
You refute yourself here: > [@chappachula](#): > > Facebook did this to me about 5 or 6 years ago. > […] > The list included everybody in my email contacts, **and a whole lot more** –including the newborn grandson of a woman I sometimes email.[…] > > Let’s call her Debbie. Now, Debbie is a typical grandmother, and I assume that she follows her family and the newborn baby on Fbook. I have zero contact with Debbie’s family (i.e.the baby’s parents), and didn’t even know the baby had been born. Yet Facebook wanted to connect me with the baby, who has his own Fbook page. What happened was that some of the people already on facebook had let it peek at their address-books and it suggested all of those and then friends and connections of those to you. That you have co-workers that are satisfied with “I’m not on facebook” as a reason for you not to connect with them, but would be deeply offended by “I only use it to connect with my closest friends” is a separate issue. ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/56 "2016-10-18T11:27:29Z")
What you’re missing is thousands of possibilities of varying utility. If most of the people you interact with and want to interact with aren’t on facebook or use old fashioned channels of communication, you might not be missing much, but facebook, twitter, etc. each can be used in a myriad ways and maybe you would personally be extremely entertained if you signed up for twitter and did nothing with it except follow William Shatner. It’s impossible to know. My 88 year old grandmother has a facebook account and uses it to keep in touch with children and grand-children in a way she wouldn’t be able to if she was off facebook. Sure her descendants would talk to her and show her pictures in person, but it would never be as frequent and immediate as the invites-only family pictures group. ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/57 "2016-10-18T12:21:35Z")
> [@naita](#): > > That you have co-workers that are satisfied with “I’m not on facebook” as a reason for you not to connect with them, but would be deeply offended by “I only use it to connect with my closest friends” is a separate issue. Im not sure it’s a separate issue. The OP asked if he is missing something. And I say, “Yes, you are.” You are “missing” out on an opportunity to ruin your life and get fired. My boss doesn’t feel personally insulted that I’m not on facebook. That just means I have “defriended” the entire planet, including her. I have cut off all 7 billion people equally. But she _would_ feel insulted if I blocked her personally and individually from my facebook page. And it’s not just my boss. Here are some other worries: Suppose I have fairly distant relatives who I only see once a year. FBook would be a great way to stay in touch–but then they start to spam me with religious stuff till I get fed up and block them. That could insult them enough that at the next family reunion there would be an unpleasant atmosphere. I don’t want to cause unnecessary family drama. Or suppose a casual friend enjoys cooking. Fbook would be a great way to share recipes and encourage our friendship. But I didn’t expect her to spam Fbook with her food pics 3 times a day. Eventually, I get tired of it, so I semi-block her,and she suddenly discovers that she can’t post to my feed or the wall or whatever it’s called. She might feel insulted. So my having a Facebook page has endangered a friendship, instead of encouraging it. ---
**Author:** ![Me\_Billy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e480ec/32.png) [@Me\_Billy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Me_Billy)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/58 "2016-10-18T14:09:19Z")
Not missing anything by avoiding Facebook except getting into trouble with other people. HOWEVER note that some businesses, schools, governments, and news organizations now will post news on their Facebook page and they have stopped posting this stuff on their web pages. You can get an account using a fictitious name and just look at these types of Facebook pages - like reading the news. So long as you never post anything, you will stay out of trouble. So far as smart phones, note an Android smart phone is like a small P.C. You can use it for anything a P.C. can be used for. And Android is now available on larger screen tablets and laptop P.C.s (called Chromebook). Also you can get an Android box for your TV called a MINIX U1. So while I don’t use my cell phone for anything but phone calls, I do have a used Android smart phone which I use to play CD music. I have over 200 CDs stored on it which I copied to it using my PC. And I watch TV now using an Android TV box (MINIX U1). Note I am VERY SERIOUSLY thinking about replacing my Microsoft PC with an Android Chromebook. Then I will be done with Microsoft FOREVER! (Google listens to their customers, Microsoft does not.) ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/59 "2016-10-18T14:18:57Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > Im not sure it’s a separate issue. The OP asked if he is missing something. I meant separate from your paranoia about facebook reading your address list. > [@](#): > > My boss doesn’t feel personally insulted that I’m not on facebook. That just means I have “defriended” the entire planet, including her. I have cut off all 7 billion people equally. > But she _would_ feel insulted if I blocked her personally and individually from my facebook page. > > And it’s not just my boss. > Here are some other worries: > Suppose I have fairly distant relatives who I only see once a year. FBook would be a great way to stay in touch–but then they start to spam me with religious stuff till I get fed up and block them. That could insult them enough that at the next family reunion there would be an unpleasant atmosphere. I don’t want to cause unnecessary family drama. > Or suppose a casual friend enjoys cooking. Fbook would be a great way to share recipes and encourage our friendship. But I didn’t expect her to spam Fbook with her food pics 3 times a day. Eventually, I get tired of it, so I semi-block her,and she suddenly discovers that she can’t post to my feed or the wall or whatever it’s called. She might feel insulted. > So my having a Facebook page has endangered a friendship, instead of encouraging it. If you have a boss that thin skinned and can’t simply ignore/unfollow (this is invisible to them) your proselytizing relatives and spammy friends. Then yeah, you are probably better off without it. But remarkably several million people have managed to avoid those dangers, so maybe it’s your specific set of fellow humans that’s the problem. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843/60 "2016-10-18T15:15:36Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > Your questions brings to mind the words of the great Nobel Prize winning Mr Bob Dylan: > > “You’d better start swimming or you’ll sink like a stone…” > > If you don’t want to wake up one day entirely disconnected from life as its being lived all around you, you’d better get in the game. > > Being out of the mainstream can be appealing in an young, arty, hipster. But it can be truly debilitating in old age. And progress, as you may have noticed, moves ever faster. > > Do try and at least keep pace! Facebook, as a substitute for actual family? Laughable. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/am-i-really-missing-anything-using-social-media/768843.md?page=4)