# Amazing Race 5/10 - "This is how you lose a million viewers." **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 10, 2009, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952 "2009-05-10T16:18:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/41 "2009-05-11T12:50:19Z")
Allegedly there was an unaired Detour choice on the final leg, and all three teams went to the fake luau. So to take **Tangent** ’s idea, let’s put together Phil’s lines for the Detour: \*In this Detour, teams must choose between two tasks involving elements of Hawai’ian culture and overdone shows. The choice: (pause) Jump the Shark or Hump the Pig. In Jump the Shark, teams travel by taxi to Beach Entry nnnn. They will then put on water skis, and be towed behind a speedboat over this ski jump – over a pod of sharks. When both team members complete the jump, the boat pilot will hand them their next clue. The task may look simple, but teams with pool balance may wind up (pause) sleeping with the fishes.\* ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/42 "2009-05-11T12:56:29Z")
Margie is SuperMom. She kicks ass. I think it’s so funny that her son is a whiny little pout with the emotional maturity of a kindergartner and she’s all “Come ON!” as she dives into the water to swim out to the WaveRunner and hop into the driver’s position. She’s like Ripley in _Aliens_. As much as I enjoyed seeing the cheerleaders in their bikinis (did they change into them in the taxi? Nice.), I’m glad they didn’t win. ---
**Author:** ![jacquilynne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/67e7ee/32.png) [@jacquilynne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jacquilynne)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/43 "2009-05-11T13:08:54Z")
I only saw the last few minutes of that, but I’m always uncomfortable when the last task is a roadblock. I know they have to fit one in there somewhere, but I’d really rather see the detour be last for a few reasons: - It seems really unfair to make one person shoulder so much of the guilt for losing if they suck at the last task. I’m sure that makes for better after race interviews, but ugh. - It’s a team race, and it seems dumb to have so much of the result come down to the performance of half the team. I realize that it would really be the same amount regardless of whether the roadblock came first, and then the detour, but it doesn’t feel that way on television. - It really ratchets down the actual tension for the run to the mat. If teams are in different places, doing different things, and then in the taxi at the same time, you’re left wondering who will get there first. Once Tammy & Victor left the surfboards, it was obvious that Tammy & Victor were going to win. ---
**Author:** ![Theodore\_Striker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Theodore\_Striker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Theodore_Striker)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/44 "2009-05-11T13:13:40Z")
Mrs. S. and I were talking after the end, and decided that this whole season was pretty meh… no really outstanding crazy tasks, likable and hate-able teams gone early, and 3 teams that were easy to dislike in the end. We were rooting for Margie and Whiny, basically because Margie kicked so much ass throughout the entire race. Neither of us have liked T&V since there introduction (We’re Harvard lawyers), and the redheads were just ugly people for the most part. Is it just me, or do Tammy and Victor both come across as seriously repressed of life experience? ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/45 "2009-05-11T13:17:44Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > A second team showed up _after the gate had been retracted_, _after_ the plane had left the tarmac and was heading towards the runway and the, the plane “Just happened” to turn around and come back to pick up the second team. :rolleyes: > > That (IIRC) was the same leg where the slower team didn’t bother to pay the taxi driver on the last leg and won the race anyway. If I’m not mistaken, the jet-bridge had retracted, but the plane had not yet left the gate. Also, didn’t they scrape together the money for the cab by begging from passersby? ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/46 "2009-05-11T13:21:46Z")
Okay, so which of the cheerleaders had the tramp-stamp? I still can’t tell them apart unless one of them is talking. ---
**Author:** ![mske](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ccd318/32.png) [@mske](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mske)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/47 "2009-05-11T13:49:41Z")
> [@ArchiveGuy](#): > > I have to say, though, that I’m glad Luke had such a problem getting those last two surfboards, because that meant everytime he put a new one in place, the camera would do a quickpan over to the blonde hottie in the bikini. Over. and Over. and Over. 😃 I found it strange/interesting/hilarious that Luke had a picture perfect memory of the early tasks of the race as evidenced by the first 9 surfboards correct, but couldn’t seem to remember what he did _yesterday_… ---
**Author:** ![notfrommensa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f14d63/32.png) [@notfrommensa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notfrommensa)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/48 "2009-05-11T15:10:09Z")
> [@Scuba\_Ben](#): > > Allegedly there was an unaired Detour choice on the final leg, and all three teams went to the fake luau. > > So to take **Tangent** ’s idea, let’s put together Phil’s lines for the Detour: > > \*In this Detour, teams must choose between two tasks involving elements of Hawai’ian culture and overdone shows. The choice: (pause) Jump the Shark or Hump the Pig. > > In Jump the Shark, teams travel by taxi to Beach Entry nnnn. They will then put on water skis, and be towed behind a speedboat over this ski jump – over a pod of sharks. When both team members complete the jump, the boat pilot will hand them their next clue. The task may look simple, but teams with pool balance may wind up (pause) sleeping with the fishes.\* Don;t leave me hanging like this, where is the detour description for “_Hump the Hog_”? [edited for alliteration purposes] OK, I’ll suggest: “_In Hump the Hog, teams travel by 4-wheeler to Old McDonalds farm. While singing ‘with an oink oink here and oink oink there’ team locate a sow and artificailly inseminate sow with Boar semen. When sow squeals with fulfillment and lights a cigarette, Old McDonald will hand them their next clue. The task may look simple, but teams with poor knowledge of swine anatomy may have to use their own equipment_.” Jaime had the tramp stamp ---
**Author:** ![Lok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e8c25b/32.png) [@Lok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lok)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/49 "2009-05-11T15:11:52Z")
> [@Robot Arm](#): > > Tammy said she couldn’t lift it up to her shoulders. I think the smart move would have been for Victor to lift one end onto her shoulders, then lift and carry the other end himself. You are assuming that Victor could get the pig up high enough to get it on his shoulders. :dubious: Besides, if he lifted it up to her shoulders, the pig would have slid down the pole to his end, so he would have had to basically lift then entire thing to his shoulders. > [@mske](#): > > I found it strange/interesting/hilarious that Luke had a picture perfect memory of the early tasks of the race as evidenced by the first 9 surfboards correct, but couldn’t seem to remember what he did _yesterday_… He worked hard going through the earlier events, but didn’t bother with the last couple because he had figured he had just done them, how could he forget. Pressure, that is how. 😛 > [@enalzi](#): > > It seemed to me like they went to Hana Highway, they just weren’t sure which direction to go on it. From the place they did the search through the buoys, there was only one way to go on the Hana Highway. They just needed to go up to Kahului and follow the highway around the island from there. And the [surfboard fence](http://www.mauisurfboardfence.com/) is even a local landmark, so the taxi drivers not knowing it is really sad. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/50 "2009-05-11T15:26:47Z")
> [@Theodore\_Striker](#): > > Is it just me, or do Tammy and Victor both come across as seriously repressed of life experience? This will verge dangerously toward ethnic stereotyping, but they’ve probably spent their entire life with their noses in textbooks, with the sole goal of getting into Harvard Law and pleasing their parents. Mission accomplished, so hopefully they can take their winnings and relax a little. It’s entirely unfair to deride T&V’s accomplishment because the Race went through China. First, they put in the hours to learn Mandarin. Second, the producers had no way of knowing that T&V would still be in the race when they hit China. And third…it didn’t help them that much. They managed to come in 2nd in at least one leg. And to counter act all that supposed favoritism, they left the Beijing pit stop with a 2 hour lead, only to see it disappear immediately at the airport. Victor then zipped through the surfboard challenge solely on the basis of an impressive feat of memory under pressure. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/51 "2009-05-11T17:35:59Z")
> [@notfrommensa](#): > > Don;t leave me hanging like this, where is the detour description for “_Hump the Hog_”? [edited for alliteration purposes] > > OK, I’ll suggest: “_In Hump the Hog, teams travel by 4-wheeler to Old McDonalds farm. While singing ‘with an oink oink here and oink oink there’ team locate a sow and artificailly inseminate sow with Boar semen. When sow squeals with fulfillment and lights a cigarette, Old McDonald will hand them their next clue. The task may look simple, but teams with poor knowledge of swine anatomy may have to use their own equipment_.” :eek: Wow, actually I was just intending “Hump the Pig” (or Hog) to refer to the challenge in this episode (and also as a TAR synonym for Jump the Shark). “Hump” can mean “to carry.” So when the contestants were carrying the dead pigs down the beach, they were actually humping the pigs. I think I saw your idea on _Dirty Jobs_, though. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/52 "2009-05-11T22:04:13Z")
I knew Luke and Margie were sunk as soon as Luke didn’t get all the boards right the first time. As we saw in the Chekhov task, thinking things through is not his strongest point. I did want Margie to win just for carrying the pig so well but I don’t mind Tammy and Victor. I am wondering, though, just long the other teams waited before sharing the solution. I get the feeling that it was longer than it looked. ---
**Author:** ![amarone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@amarone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarone)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/53 "2009-05-11T23:00:59Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > Also, are there any indications of cheating by the producers? Maybe of the sort of camera team providing clues, or something similiar? I don’t know, but the Chekhov leg looked suspicious. Some players, including Luke, seemed utterly befuddled, and the next thing you see they have got it right and are on their way. I suppose the producers would not show all 176 incorrect guesses, but Luke seemed to have absolutely no idea, and then got it right. Also, is there some sort of time limit whereby a player can move on even though they did not complete the task? I would think there have been some where the person just simply couldn’t do it. ---
**Author:** ![jacquilynne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/67e7ee/32.png) [@jacquilynne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jacquilynne)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/54 "2009-05-11T23:09:54Z")
There is a time penalty for simply not completing a task, so that same time period might be the limit for getting it done. It would make sense if it was. ---
**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/55 "2009-05-12T00:14:22Z")
> [@amarone](#): > > I don’t know, but the Chekhov leg looked suspicious. Some players, including Luke, seemed utterly befuddled, and the next thing you see they have got it right and are on their way. I suppose the producers would not show all 176 incorrect guesses, but Luke seemed to have absolutely no idea, and then got it right. > > Also, is there some sort of time limit whereby a player can move on even though they did not complete the task? I would think there have been some where the person just simply couldn’t do it. I agree that the Chekhov puzzle seemed odd. Luke was sitting on the ground moaning, and had clearly given up, when the next thing you know… It would be interesting to know just what all goes on behind the scenes. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/56 "2009-05-12T02:06:06Z")
**zut** , where are you **zut**? The season isn’t over until we get the final Assessment. Please. ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/57 "2009-05-12T10:52:43Z")
I agree. We’ve got to have the taxi assessment – it’s the hightlight of the thread! If anyone’s interested, the _Los Angeles Times_ has an interviews with the three finalists [here.](http://travel.latimes.com/daily-deal-blog/index.php/amazing-race-14-chat-4491/) It has a photo of Jaime and Cara in bikinis and Jaime explains her attitude towards taxi drivers. Margie also talks about the kerfuffle with Kisha which made her a bit more sympathetic in my eyes. I give her credit – she’s 50 years old, which makes her 15 years older than the next oldest finalist and she did well! I still can’t stand Jaime, though. Race or no race, I can’t see myself remaining friends with someone who treated people as badly as she did. She comes off as a true control freak, although according to her, getting lost and getting gas took 45 minutes. There’s one thing that’s been bugging me. For quite a while, Luke had a surfboard with a skull in it in the slot for the 11th episode. Does anyone know where that came from? ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/58 "2009-05-12T11:12:57Z")
I’m not sure when he corrected it, but I believe Luke thought the painted skull represented the Opera makeup. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/59 "2009-05-12T12:11:09Z")
> [@jacquilynne](#): > > There is a time penalty for simply not completing a task, so that same time period might be the limit for getting it done. It would make sense if it was. IIRC, from the one time we saw the rule invoked\* it was something like a 2 hour delay that started when the _next_ team showed up (or presumably when the last team finished the task). There was an idiotic challenge (The Meatblock) where people had to eat like 8 pounds of meat. Rob figured out that if he quit the task and could get one team to quit after him, he’d necessarily come in second-to-last (the team after him would be last). It would have been an annoying way of gaming the system if the actual task hadn’t been so unspeakably terrible. \*Actually the second time: the first time was Momily-gate where, in the first season, a team bailed on a task and got an insane 24 hour penalty. That was fixed in all later seasons. ---
**Author:** ![zut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zut/32/2875_2.png) [@zut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zut)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952/60 "2009-05-12T12:40:19Z")
I’ve always kind of thought of the Taxi Assessment as a predictive assessment (“what are the chances of this team winning a million dollars?”) rather than a reactive assessment (“how did this team fare?”). So I actually wasn’t planning on writing as assessment for this leg. However, due to a pleasantly high rate of fan requests (well, two people, but that’s about three times the number that’s sufficient for me), it’s time for the… **Taxi Assessment** **Stuck in the Desert and Officially Detained** - or, Philiminated with extreme prejudice. _Jennifer and Preston_,_Linda and Steve_, _Brad and Victoria_, _Amanda and Kris_, _Christie and Jodi_, _Mel and Mike_ and _Mark and Michael_ and _LaKisha and Jennifer_ - They’re all back! Hugz for everyone! **Flat Tire** - or, not likely to get anywhere soon. _Cara and Jaime_ (down from “Rapido!”) - Remember the Taxi Assessment is predictive; I can now predict with 100% certainty that Cara & Jaime won’t be winning the million dollar prize (at least until “TAR All-Stars 2: The Leftovers”). Thus the downgrade for Cara & Jaime and Margie & Luke. I have to say I sympathize with Jaime on the Roadblock: associating St. Christopher with the Pit Stop on leg one just seems brutally difficult, and getting the other ten correct in a pressure situation after a shaky start was pretty impressive. If only Jaime had immediately offered to work with Luke, or at least done so the minute Victor left, it might have been an interesting finale. Note to Jaime: when you get back to Miami or wherever and need to get home from the airport…rent a car. (Ah…I just checked Cara and Jaime’s bio on [cbs.com](http://cbs.com). Did you know Jaime’s occupation is listed as “former police officer”? I find that astounding.) _Margie and Luke_ (down from “Passing”) - Did you notice just how far back Margie & Luke’s start time was compared to Tammy & Victor? I know Tammy & Victor had a natural language advantage in China, but a three-hour lead over the next team is a pretty convincing win. In a subtle way and despite the airport bunching, I think that three-hour lead is exactly why Tammy & Victor won. Margie & Luke just finished a horribly frustrating double leg that must have been mentally and emotionally draining (witness Margie snapping at Luke during the jet ski ride). This team sucked it up and powered through the first few tasks in first place. But unfortunately Luke’s decision-making skills degrade rapidly in the face of frustration (as shown in the Chekhov task), and they’re only worse after a long and tense penultimate leg. Give him a lot of credit for rapidly nailing nine boards, but once he got a single one wrong, he was toast, because _he doesn’t know how to reassess what he’s done_ (my apologies for criticizing the deaf kid). So long Margie & Luke. **Stopping for Gas** - or, not broken-down, exactly, but not a good sign. No one 'til next season. **“Rapido! Por Favor?”** - or, making meaningless ineffectual comments from the back seat, but in no immediate danger. No one 'til next season. **In the Passing Lane** - or, ahead of the pack, but not quite comfortably. No one 'til next season. **Cruisin’ with Earl** - or, drivin’ on the shoulder, takin’ shortcuts, and generally kickin’ butt. _Tammy and Victor_ (holding steady) - Tut tut. With my engineering background, I couldn’t help but notice that Victor was, at least once, forcing Tammy to carry more than her share of the hog. Helpful analytical hint: when carrying a heavy load on a long pole, position the weaker partner _farther_ from the load and the stronger partner _closer_. That way the stronger partner carries more weight. Apparently force analysis is not taught in law school. Anyway, it didn’t matter, and this team cruises to an easy victory (hah! get it?) with a strong showing on the final task. Although, for a little while, it looked like Margie & Luke might pull off an upset, this result was hardly surprising. Congratulations to Tammy & Victor for fending off the stiff competition. [sub]Props to **Mullinator** and his Raj Ratings.[/sub] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amazing-race-5-10-this-is-how-you-lose-a-million-viewers/495952.md?page=4)