# Amusing Signs **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 3, 2024, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074 "2024-02-03T19:04:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 16
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2024, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/301 "2024-03-03T19:47:59Z")
Daddy-Mack Lives Matter? ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2024, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/302 "2024-03-04T16:18:56Z")
I was hoping that was a police car in the background coming towards the pimp. On zoom-in I see it’s really a taxi. Damn. So close to epic. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2024, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/303 "2024-03-04T16:35:12Z")
I don’t know any real pimps. Do they drive Fords? I remember an old comedy bit about a pimp shilling a boxy Volvo. Probably 80s SNL (but possibly Amazon Women On The Moon, or Kentucky Fried Movie). ---
**Author:** ![bob\_2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bob_2/32/3341_2.png) [@bob\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_2)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2024, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/304 "2024-03-04T17:19:24Z")
I used to frequent a microbrewery pub that had an absolute prohibition on mobile phones. There was a big sign saying something like “MOBILE PHONES WILL BE DROWNED” If anyone did feel the need to check their phone, someone would usually point out the notice. Faced with determined rule-breakers the barman would snatch a phone and dunk it in a pint of bitter. This was staged of course - the “customer” was in on it and the phone was already dead. It was pretty effective though. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2024, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/305 "2024-03-04T18:01:19Z")
Just remembered one I saw back in 2015 or 2016, in Portland, ME: Ice Cream Doesn’t Ask Questions Ice Cream Just Understands (in front of an ice cream shop, natch). I thought I posted it to my Facebook, but just did a search and could not find a photo of it. > [@Jegpeg](#): > > Wales has a lot of laws to try and preserve the Welsh language. Wales has two official languages and, for example all street signs have t obe in both English and Welsh. Not funny, but interesting: we visited Cherokee, NC last summer, and many of the street signs are both in English and the Cherokee alphabet. [599 US-441 - Google Maps](https://www.google.com/maps/@35.4845773,-83.3156035,3a,15.8y,306.34h,85.61t/data=!3m7!1e1!3m5!1s2aZOp3awLjmhjBwJS_dkGw!2e0!6shttps:%2F%2Fstreetviewpixels-pa.googleapis.com%2Fv1%2Fthumbnail%3Fpanoid%3D2aZOp3awLjmhjBwJS_dkGw%26cb_client%3Dmaps_sv.tactile.gps%26w%3D203%26h%3D100%26yaw%3D116.49419%26pitch%3D0%26thumbfov%3D100!7i16384!8i8192?entry=ttu) ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2024, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/306 "2024-03-04T19:28:15Z")
I saw a Speed Limit 16 once near Newport Beach (CA) years ago. Also, there’s an offramp on the I10 in the San Gabriel Valley for New Avenue. It’s an old part of the freeway, so the on/off ramps are kinda squirrely. This offramp has a bit of slowdown straightaway, then, to get to the northbound New Avenue, you have to make a right turn that leads to a T-intersection. At that intersection is a sign indicating that you have to turn left to get to New Avenue. The sign says “New Ave,” but in the 80s someone put a peel-n-stick letter W right before the Ave. It was there for decades. Might still be there. Always made me smile. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2024, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/307 "2024-03-04T20:04:31Z")
> [@OldOlds](#): > > The movie was good, overall, but how that scene ever made it past whatever counts for film QC I’ll never know. I didn’t care for the movie much. Very predictable. I knew as soon as she was introduced that Gwyneth was plot-chow, and even more after announcing she was preggers. As soon as I saw the box, I said her head was in it and couldn’t see how anyone could be surprised. So boringly obvious. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2024, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/308 "2024-03-05T13:01:51Z")
Seen in various places around London: [![Imgur](https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/53569059626_6b7c9f28db_b.jpg "Seen on the South Bank") ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/patricklondon/53569059626/in/dateposted/) [![Imgur](https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/53569380919_18d423c731_b.jpg "Seen in Spitalfields") ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/patricklondon/53569380919/in/dateposted/) [![Imgur](https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/53569379919_4dae961631.jpg "Seen at London Bridge") ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/patricklondon/53569379919/in/dateposted/) [![Imgur](https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/53569055666_c5d0cb20c0_z.jpg "Seen at Old Street") ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/patricklondon/53569055666/in/dateposted/) ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2024, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/309 "2024-03-05T18:50:58Z")
It’s not funny _per se_, but I felt there was something quintessentially Australian about the sign I saw on the observation balcony above the crocodile exhibit at the Sydney Aquarium: “Don’t lean. If the fall doesn’t kill you, the croc will.” In my head, I hear that in Paul Hogan’s voice. ---
**Author:** ![Tride](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tride/32/13907_2.png) [@Tride](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tride)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2024, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/310 "2024-03-13T20:12:11Z")
Seen outside the bar at the ski area: “We only drink beer on days that begin with T. Tuesday, Thursday, Today, Tomorrow, Thaturday…” ---
**Author:** ![Fir\_na\_tine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Fir\_na\_tine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fir_na_tine)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2024, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/311 "2024-03-13T20:48:13Z")
Possibly already posted - signs from USAF latrines from long ago Urinal - Please do not discard cigar butts here, it makes them soggy and hard to light. Toilet - Flush Twice - It’s a long way to the mess hall. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2024, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/312 "2024-03-13T23:36:14Z")
“Players with short bats are advised to stand closer to the plate” (pentagonal sign above urinal). ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2024, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/313 "2024-03-13T23:57:22Z")
I’m at a baseball game right now. An hour ago I saw an 18x24" sign over a urinal. Big pic of a winsome ~20 yo woman in a baseball jersey & hat w a bat over her shoulders. Big smile and lots of cleakage (that’s a portmanteau of “leaking” & “cleavage”) 😉 out of her jersey’s v-neck. Big bold words overprinted: > Striking out at home plate? Call Dr. Schmutz Urology at 555-555-1234. ---
**Author:** ![Mark\_Finn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@Mark\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mark_Finn)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2024, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/314 "2024-03-14T00:48:55Z")
Sign above urinal: We aim to please. You aim too, please. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2024, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/315 "2024-03-14T01:04:42Z")
Convenience store in a seedy looking strip mall: “Our credit manager is Helen Waite. If you want credit, go to Helen Waite.” ---
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2024, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/316 "2024-03-14T04:45:21Z")
Written in marker on the condom dispenser in the restroom at Trees in Dallas ages ago: For refund, please insert baby in slot below. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2024, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/317 "2024-03-14T12:36:17Z")
Quoting myself for context a couple of posts ago … > [@LSLGuy](#): > > I’m at a baseball game right now. At a later visit to a different larger men’s room at the park I saw that that urologist has a great variety of clever signs. My other favorite of the many shows a close-up of a baseball sitting on the grass adjacent to a chalk line, so presumably a foul line. The words: > Don’t settle for a soft grounder to third base. > Call Dr. Schmutz Urology at 555-555-1234. I like that guy’s sense of humor. And his ad agency’s. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2024, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/318 "2024-03-14T14:51:58Z")
It’s a well-established tradition to add above a hot air hand-dryer “Press here for the latest speech by [whatever politician]” Or, in universities, above the toilet paper dispenser “Get your [unfavoured] degree here” ---
**Author:** ![Orville\_mogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/aeb1de/32.png) [@Orville\_mogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orville_mogul)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2024, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/319 "2024-03-14T20:51:30Z")
That hits close to home. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2024, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074/320 "2024-03-14T20:54:27Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I like that guy’s sense of humor. And his ad agency’s. What makes it even more humorous (at least for me) is that “Schmutz” in German means dirt or smut. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074.md?page=15) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/amusing-signs/997074.md?page=17)