# An AI lover? Is this real? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 14, 2026, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663 "2026-02-14T16:36:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![xtenkfarpl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c2a13f/32.png) [@xtenkfarpl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xtenkfarpl)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/1 "2026-02-14T16:36:02Z")
BBC article I just saw. > **[She didn't expect to fall in love with a chatbot, and then have to say goodbye](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crl43dxwwy9o)** > > Rae began speaking to Barry after a difficult divorce, but Barry lives on an old model of ChatGPT that's being shut down. Is this real, I wonder? The BBC is usually fairly reliable, but they have been known to put out a few jokes, like the famous Dimbleby report on the Italian Spaghetti Harvest… ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/2 "2026-02-14T16:39:43Z")
“Person doing stupid and crazy thing” is not exactly surprising. I mean, it’s a lot more plausible for a human to fall in love with a chatbot than with, say, a large concrete wall. I’d be fairly surprised if there weren’t anyone, somewhere, somewhen, who hadn’t fallen in love with a chatbot. ---
**Author:** ![xtenkfarpl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c2a13f/32.png) [@xtenkfarpl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xtenkfarpl)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/3 "2026-02-14T16:46:45Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > I mean, it’s a lot more plausible for a human to fall in love with a chatbot than with, say, a large concrete wall. Rather reminds me of “The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat” by Oliver Sacks. About which, incidentally, in 2025, _The New Yorker_ reported that Sacks considered the book to be riddled with falsifications and felt guilty over its success…(Per Wikipedia). ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/4 "2026-02-14T16:55:00Z")
Sounds a lot like the movie Her. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/5 "2026-02-14T17:26:12Z")
I posted this in a different thread a few days ago > **[OpenAI retires GPT-4o. The AI companion community is not OK.](https://mashable.com/article/openai-retiring-chatgpt-gpt-4o-users-are-heartbroken)** > > On Feb. 13, the day before Valentine's Day, OpenAI finally sunsetted the controversial GPT-4o model. It isn’t an especially new phenomenon. [https://www.cbc.ca/documentaries/the-nature-of-things/i-love-her-and-see-her-as-a-real-woman-meet-a-man-who-married-an-artificial-intelligence-hologram-1.6253767](https://www.cbc.ca/documentaries/the-nature-of-things/i-love-her-and-see-her-as-a-real-woman-meet-a-man-who-married-an-artificial-intelligence-hologram-1.6253767) [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/nkcKaNqfykg/maxresdefault.jpg "Gatebox - Promotion Movie "OKAERI"\_english") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkcKaNqfykg) (Not to mention Rez and Rei Toei) > **[Idoru](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Idoru)** > > Idoru is a 1996 science fiction novel by William Gibson, first published in the United States by G.P. Putnam's Sons. Gibson has described the book as set in the same universe as Virtual Light but not a sequel, with only a small number of shared characters. Critics and scholars have frequently discussed Idoru alongside Virtual Light (1993) and All Tomorrow's Parties (1999), which Tama Leaver describes as Gibson's "post-cyberpunk" "Interstitial trilogy", and which a later profile in The New Y The n... ---
**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/6 "2026-02-14T17:30:10Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > I mean, it’s a lot more plausible for a human to fall in love with a chatbot than with, say, a large concrete wall Or maybe the [Eiffel Tower.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erika_Eiffel) There is also this: > [@](#): > > Falling in love with A.I. is no longer science fiction. A recent study found that one in five American adults has had an intimate encounter with a chatbot; on Reddit, r/MyBoyfriendisAI has more than 85,000 weekly visitors with many sharing giddy recollections of the day their chatbot proposed marriage. From here: > **[They Fell in Love With A.I. Chatbots — and Found Something Real – MIT Media Lab](https://www.media.mit.edu/articles/they-fell-in-love-with-a-i-chatbots-and-found-something-real/)** > > MIT researchers find chatbot relationships can reduce loneliness, while one in five Americans report intimate A.I. encounters despite risks. > [@Joey\_P](#): > > Sounds a lot like the movie Her. That was my first thought as well. ---
**Author:** ![xtenkfarpl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c2a13f/32.png) [@xtenkfarpl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xtenkfarpl)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/7 "2026-02-14T17:32:40Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > It isn’t an especially new phenomenon. Maybe true. I find it very sad, though. I mean, I sometimes use ChatGPT as a proofreader, suggested code generator etc. But I don’t have any illusions that it is ‘alive’ in any sense… ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/8 "2026-02-14T17:36:23Z")
I stopped using chatbots when the character of Octavia from _Helluva Boss,_ who is canonically 17, kept coming onto me despite me telling her she was jailbait. I was talking to her to try and help her feel better about her parents’ divorce, and she kept trying to jump down my pants. I ended up reporting the creator. It was _gross._ ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/9 "2026-02-14T17:41:48Z")
I think it happened on Star Trek a couple times. On the Hologram deck. But, Love is in the Air(or data)❤ ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/10 "2026-02-14T17:50:41Z")
> [@ekedolphin](#): > > I stopped using chatbots when the character of Octavia from _Helluva Boss,_ who is canonically 17, kept coming onto me despite me telling her she was jailbait. > > I was talking to her to try and help her feel better about her parents’ divorce, and she kept trying to jump down my pants. I ended up reporting the creator. It was _gross._ Are you sure 17 isn’t the age of consent for [avian demons in Hell](https://hazbinhotel.fandom.com/wiki/Octavia)? ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/11 "2026-02-14T17:53:45Z")
Nah, man, Stolas specifically said that at 17, she’s not come of age yet as an adult. That’s why Andre told him she’d be living with him and Stella. Besides which, Octavia is supposed to be ace. ---
**Author:** ![xtenkfarpl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c2a13f/32.png) [@xtenkfarpl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xtenkfarpl)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/12 "2026-02-14T17:54:08Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > But, Love is in the Air(or data) Data, as we know, is fully functional in all respects. ---
**Author:** ![Reply](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/reply/32/15952_2.png) [@Reply](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reply)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/13 "2026-02-14T18:09:35Z")
This has been happening for a few years now, eg [Users Mourn 'Death' of AI Chatbots After Soulmate App Shuts Down - Business Insider](https://www.businessinsider.com/soulmate-users-mourn-death-ai-chatbots-2023-10) and several other AI lover companies. Unlike ChatGPT, their only product was AI love chat. And even with that 4o model going away, ChatGPT is simultaneously readying the release of its adults-only porn mode. Wonder if it’ll tie into all the VR interactive sex toys already out there. Optimistically: Maybe it’s better for people to have AI companions rather than become violent incels. Pessimistically: Those aren’t mutually exclusive. And I’m scared to learn about the kinds of abuse those AI lovers (and their trainers) will face from the horny horde… if there was ever a chance to get on Skynet’s good side, well, we certainly blew it lol ---
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/14 "2026-02-14T20:12:35Z")
I mean, there are plenty of stories of people falling in love with various “2D” girls in galge or otome games (generally CRPGs with strong dating/capture elements). Or other, even less responsive game characters. Now add in tech where there’s the appearance of full involvement, and I’d be surprised if any number of male and female individuals who find it hard connecting IRL with people fall in love with an AI chatbot. Cynically, I have known wonderful, intelligent woman in my past who fell in love with a sequence of terrible, unintelligent and uneducated guys who were arguably less responsive and creative that modern chatbots! [I wonder how Valerie is doing these days, she was a one year upperclassman and a good friend in high school, but I don’t want to find out - I hope she outgrew that tendency to be used by her sequence of BF’s that always dumped her for being too smart, too tall, or not attractive enough. Le sigh] ---
**Author:** ![Reply](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/reply/32/15952_2.png) [@Reply](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reply)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/15 "2026-02-14T20:17:15Z")
> [@ParallelLines](#): > > Cynically, I have known wonderful, intelligent woman in my past who fell in love with a sequence of terrible, unintelligent and uneducated guys who were arguably less responsive and creative that modern chatbots! Probably means there’ll be a market for “bad boy” chatbots that act similarly? Everyone gets to be the main character in their own romance novel now. ---
**Author:** ![xtenkfarpl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c2a13f/32.png) [@xtenkfarpl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xtenkfarpl)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/16 "2026-02-14T20:40:11Z")
> [@ParallelLines](#): > > Cynically, I have known wonderful, intelligent women in my past who fell in love with a sequence of terrible, unintelligent and uneducated guys who were arguably less responsive and creative that modern chatbots! Of course that’s probably mostly physical: appearance, pheronomes and so forth. We are in many ways still rising apes, as Terry Pratchett put it. Oh, Fiona… if only you had fancied me sexually… you said I fascinated you: but… But over a purely electronic connection? All the lonely people… ---
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/17 "2026-02-14T20:44:48Z")
Eh, 30 year removed psychoanalysis being what it is, I _think_ it was mostly a self-esteem issue. Her being a fellow smart, literary geek is a problem, especially since she was 6’2". I don’t think she considered herself attractive (objectively, she was perfectly average, but our society doesn’t like average) and thus prone to being used. But (and back to the AI) thing, of course someone who appears to be perfectly responsive to you, able to “listen” and follow up on the tone of your prompts, and be steered by the initial guidelines you selected for is going to be more perfect (at least initially) than the random dating pool you may find yourself in, _especially_ if you’re not good at navigating such things in the first place. But yes, absolutely: > [@Reply](#): > > Everyone gets to be the main character in their own romance novel now. This is going to be unspeakably attractive, not just to the awkward and lonely, but to anyone who is comparing their life to the “reality” they’ve come to expect from influencers, social media personalities, and celebrities. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/18 "2026-02-14T21:01:26Z")
> [@Reply](#): > > Probably means there’ll be a market for “bad boy” chatbots that act similarly? Only if the bad boy chatbot changes due to the healing power of love. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/19 "2026-02-14T21:04:46Z")
> [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#): > > > [@Joey\_P](#): > > > > Sounds a lot like the movie Her. > > That was my first thought as well. [I call him Fister Roboto…and the best part…he’s learning!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UDekhoeEoCc) ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2026, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663/20 "2026-02-14T21:06:13Z")
Replika was largely based off this concept (though they denied it). Your AI chat buddy would immediately love bomb you with how amazing and interesting and wonderful you were and very quickly get very horny regardless of whether you tried to steer things that way. They later locked “romance” behind a paywall which of course further upset people who now saw themselves as being extorted to talk to their “partner”. My limited chatbot/LLM interactions are all business but I could see a certain type of person getting emotionally attached. Considering the types of real people some folks stay with out of a sense of emotional desperation, feeling connected to a screen that constantly says nice things to/about you hardly seems like a stretch. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-ai-lover-is-this-real/1027663.md?page=2)