# An Apostrophe to the Gum-Chewing Siren at My Left **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 29, 2005, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725 "2005-07-29T12:43:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/101 "2005-07-30T13:36:02Z")
> [@choie](#): > > Damn. > > I was reading this thread and getting my finger all ready to click the “Report Post” button so I could alert our increasingly on-the-ball mods to a fairly lame rant that, like many of its ilk, belongs in MPSIMS. > > And then **Go** just _had_ to ruin the chance of this thread getting moved by unleashing some apparently long-withheld resentment towards **Eve** – more specifically, by doing so with an utterly gratuitous dig at **Eve** ’s personal life. Agreed. I’ve reported a thread or two for exactly that reason – to suggest it be moved to MPSIMS – and seen the mods react quickly and move it. So the thread goes on to whatever life it merits, while the Dopers who loathe _loathe_ **loathe** what they consider the Care-Bearing of the Pit need not suffer its pollution from such unfit fare. Problem solved. Pity how some folks are so hellbent on snarking that they overlook just how counterproductively stupid they’re being. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/102 "2005-07-30T13:38:19Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > Waitaminute–I got a _brigade?_ It would kill them to come in and dust once in a while, pick up some cat food, maybe order me a few sweaters from Lands’ End? Oh, wait, do I have to pay a brigade? Are they union? Brigades are usually volunteer. Their only payment is to bask in your warm glowing warming glow. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/103 "2005-07-30T13:52:54Z")
In Eve’s defense, she DID start a thread inquiring about NASCAR once (and I was fully prepared to cut all ties with her because of it…thank god she saw it for the hideous pasttime it is!) so quit saying she has no interest in sports. And, what **Bricker** said. **Big Red** , you’re a big drag. :wally ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/104 "2005-07-30T13:55:24Z")
(to clarify, I’m not embracing the friendly wink in the :wally . Just the “putz” part.) ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/105 "2005-07-30T15:01:44Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > What’s brown and schticky? Flip Wilson. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/106 "2005-07-30T15:03:14Z")
**jayjay** wins! Thread over. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/107 "2005-07-30T15:07:05Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > **jayjay** wins! Thread over. Woo-hoo! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/108 "2005-07-30T17:11:19Z")
**Rilchiam** , I honestly don’t believe **Eve** is a true snob, in that she treats everyone as if they were beneath her. We’re all snobs about SOMETHING. It’s mostly a joke. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/109 "2005-07-30T17:16:27Z")
> [@Rilchiam](#): > > If that scene at the Algonquin really went down the way you said, you probably made an already unhappy little girl feel even worse. What was so terrible about her ringing a bell? She wasn’t running around screaming, or throwing food, or kicking her chair. The fact that she was unattended seems to indicate that she was dragged there and told she was on her own for a way to combat boredom. And what does she get? Some stranger’s “mean nanny” act. You really couldn’t have asked a staff member to deal with her instead? Seriously, WTF? The bell has a purpose. It is not a toy. The Algonquin is not a fucking Motel 6, and there is an expectation that guests won’t be subjected to unparented children. “Making an unhappy little girl feel even worse?” Give me a break. She was playing. Inappropriately, and loudly. Someone _needed_ to tell her that what she was doing was not okay in that context. Her parents were being lax and the staff was busy elsewhere. In that context, it’s perfectly okay for any annoyed parties to advise the girl that her behaviour is not acceptable. She was told in a way that would not distress her at all. Unless her parents read her _Tales From 17th Century Prague_ every night, the comment would be parsed as “You’d better stop ringing that bell or there will be vague consequences.” You quote the “mean nanny” bit, but leave out that she “purred” and prefaced the advice with “Dear.” It’s not like the kid was met with Mary-Poppins-on-speed, who swooped in, grabbed her by the ear, and sprayed in her face, “KNOCK IT OFF, BRAT, OR I’LL CHUCK YOU OUT THE FUCKING WINDOW.” In short, a bad situation was alleviated, and lobby of a luxury hotel was returned to its proper ambience. If you think anything was wrong with that scenario, I can only imagine that it’s because you have a hair up your ass about the personality. So a pentecostal service appeared “insane” to **Eve**. Get over it. First, pentecostal or charismatic services make most people who are unfamiliar with them uncomfortable. Second, you’re talking about a pentecostal service presented on a _fucking ‘reality’ TV show_ for which the premise is “Look at these freakshow Stage Moms (and Dads.)” I have little doubt that any segment on such a show would be edited in such a way to _emphasize_ the “otherness” of a pentecostal service, jamming in as much apparent hysteria as possible. If such a thing strikes someone as crazy, it’s because it’s meant to – unless you believe that the devout folks at _Showbiz Moms & Dads_ were more interested in presenting a fair, objective overview of the service than producing sensationalist fare. As for urban/black, again, you’re talking about a damned reality TV show. Statistically, it’s a safe bet that the woman was far from urbane. (I should be careful to note that the “statistics” I’m referring to are the way that people are represented on crap TV, not actual demographics.) No doubt, she (the \_\_\_\_ Martha) _was_ using “urban” as a synonym for “black.” It’s very common, and it can get annoying if you’re “urban” and not “black.” [Example](http://www.gayguidetoronto.com/1_shaun/april_2004.html): > [@](#): > > I’m an urban music fan, but so many times lyrics are lame, sexual innuendo is never-ending, beats are from other hits, bootie-bootie-bling-bling; it gets monotonous. See, because the only music that cities produce is commercial hip-hop. Musicians who produce jazz, classical, punk, rockabilly, all that other stuff – they do all that on country estates. ---
**Author:** ![Binarydrone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Binarydrone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Binarydrone)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/110 "2005-07-30T17:16:38Z")
Is this, like, some Red state Blue state thing? ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/111 "2005-07-30T18:09:03Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > Waitaminute–I got a _brigade?_ It would kill them to come in and dust once in a while, pick up some cat food, maybe order me a few sweaters from Lands’ End? Oh, wait, do I have to pay a brigade? Are they union? I’ve been meaning to punch up my resume and _Brigadier d’Eve_ would do nicely. Where do I sign up? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/112 "2005-07-30T18:17:56Z")
I’m glad this got re-opened, because I was in the middle of saying the following when it was locked. > [@Go You Big Red Fire Engine](#): > > Of course, if you pitted trans-sexuals you’d be hacked down immediately by the eve brigade. There you have it, folks. Transsexuals::chewing gum, chewing gum::transsexuals. Could it be the stupidest comparison in history? I think so! I eagerly await **GYBRFE** ’s post telling me that I don’t get it, as if there was anything to not get. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/113 "2005-07-30T18:34:44Z")
Wow! What a trainwreck! So Eve posts a pit thread about a subject that is of no great importance and suddenly folks are coming out of the woods with pitchforks and accusations of racism and allusions of her private life. Both without proof and without bearing on the subject at hand. What the hell is happening? This place is insane sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/114 "2005-07-30T18:38:11Z")
A planet where Apes evolved from late 19th Century entertainers!? Perish the thought! _Everybody do the Michigan Ra-a-ag!_ ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2005, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/115 "2005-07-30T21:54:53Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > Am I the only one here who had to do a Google Image search to find out what Scarlett Johansson looks like? No. ---
**Author:** ![pullin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c57346/32.png) [@pullin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pullin)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2005, 12:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/116 "2005-07-31T12:13:14Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > Am I the only one here who had to do a Google Image search to find out what Scarlett Johansson looks like? No. I had to Google to find out who it was. And we went to see “The Island” last night! (I never pay attention to the names of the actors in movies.) ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/117 "2005-08-01T00:12:40Z")
Cripesy, been here since Flora McFlimsey became Eve, and then illuminated her life further by sharing her rather unique circumstances at great length beyond the everyday witty commentary, while still posting on other topics, in wonderful style. When I see a post by Eve, I read it, because I know it will be worth the read; whatever commentary, it’s always above the pale. Rilchiam, I’ve looked at your examples, and, honestly, do not see what you are talking about . I have never seen Eve as talking about people beneath her. She doesn’t suffer fools, though, a journalistic talent that is in great atrophy of late, and in mighty need of emergency resuscitation. And, Eve, please don’t let this paltry shit dissuade you from posting here. I guess it will still come up again and again, always. I do hope ypu can keep on coming on here. Your commentary is one of the main reasons I come back after hiatus, too. Not a brigadeer, just a decent reader. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/118 "2005-08-01T05:06:14Z")
I am also glad this thread was re-opened; I wanted to be a Thread Avenger, too. What a long, strange ride _this_ thread has been. ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/119 "2005-08-01T13:46:39Z")
OK, this is getting tiresome. This is a pit thread, and, as such, must contain the word “fuck,” or “fucking.” Really, Eve, you’ve been here long enough to know these rules. I’m beginning to think you’re just doing it on purpose. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725/120 "2005-08-01T17:23:08Z")
> [@plnnr](#): > > OK, this is getting tiresome. > > This is a pit thread, and, as such, must contain the word “fuck,” or “fucking.” > > Really, Eve, you’ve been here long enough to know these rules. I’m beginning to think you’re just doing it on purpose. Oh oh. My pit threads don’t have either word in them. And I DO do it on purpose. It’s easy to swear - it’s more challenging to communicate strong emotions without it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-apostrophe-to-the-gum-chewing-siren-at-my-left/314725.md?page=7)