# An etiquette question: how do you tell a complete stranger her butt is showing? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 1, 2010, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557 "2010-06-01T21:52:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2010, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/61 "2010-06-03T13:41:15Z")
These certainly do appear to be 6 impossible things, whether before or after the morning meal. > [@](#): > > - Shoo!TAG represents a paradigm shift in the pest management industry. > - Shoo!TAG utilises Nature’s energetic principles in combination with physics, quantum physics and advanced computer software technology. > - The key to Shoo!TAG is the three dimensional electromagnetic field embedded in the magnetic strip. > - Shoo!TAG utilises the power of the bio-energetic field which surrounds all living things to create a frequency barrier which repels targeted pests for up to four months. > - Shoo!TAG’s magnetic strip is encoded with beneficial frequencies and resonances and an electromagnetic charge bearing a polarised energy signature, which when introduced into the bio-energetic field of the wearer produces results. > - Shoo!TAG also assists the body in altering its external bio energetic field so as to effectively repel targeted pests. This is possible because various insects and pests react to frequencies. These frequencies are introduced into the bio-energetic field of the wearer. These specific frequencies and resonance have proved to disturb pests and create a barrier. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2010, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/62 "2010-06-03T14:05:34Z")
> [@corkboard](#): > > No, no, no. You do it in the supply closet only when you’re trying to hide from others. Since I was regularly porking all the chicks in the office during our lunchtime gangbang sessions, there was no reason to hide it. Which is why we did it on the conference table. > > Or not, as it happens. OMG!!! You work in [this office??](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=80750) ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2010, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/63 "2010-06-03T14:43:33Z")
I don’t have advice on how to tell someone they are exposing themselves but I do have a story! I went to karaoke about a year ago and a woman was called to the stage for her song, which was Proud Mary. As she walked from the back of the room towards the front where I was sitting I saw people either laughing or reaching out to try and get her attention but she didn’t notice any of it and I soon found out that the reason for this was that her skirt had gotten folded up on itself and her bare ass was hanging out of her dress. She proceeded to sing and twirl and kick her way through the song, oblivious to her situation. Finally the DJ reached out behind her and pulled her dress back into place since she wouldn’t pay attention to all the people trying to tell her that her butt was exposed. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2010, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/64 "2010-06-03T14:49:08Z")
Just call me the “doctor”. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Astral\_Rejection](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/258eb7/32.png) [@Astral\_Rejection](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astral_Rejection)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2010, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/65 "2010-07-10T20:47:54Z")
I don’t find corkboard’s story odd. I used to be a lifeguard at a pool where all of my coworkers were female. On a day I wasn’t scheduled, one of the guards’ tops apparently exploded. They all teased me for missing it. Granted, we’re talking about 17 year old girls, so I suppose it’s likely they WERE channeling their inner 14-year-old-boy, but nothing about corkboard’s story sounds fake to me. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2010, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/66 "2010-07-10T23:12:55Z")
What would you like if that were you? To me that is the question and only you can answer it. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/67 "2010-07-11T01:37:14Z")
What’s wrong with “Excuse me, you seem to have a problem with your skirt.” I’m a teacher and ended up having this situation in class. A student discreetly told me and I fixed it. No problems. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/68 "2010-07-12T18:40:20Z")
I would definitely go tell her, discretely. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/69 "2010-07-12T21:16:22Z")
The other night I went out to eat with my youngest son, 11. A lady came to sit at the table next to us, hugely pregnant, and her tank top had slipped down beneath her bra. So her whole bra was sticking out, with these huge preggo boobs popping out. I didn’t know what to say, or if she was doing it on purpose, or what to do, so we just hurried up and finished eating and left. ---
**Author:** ![Perciful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@Perciful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Perciful)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/70 "2010-07-12T22:23:12Z")
It seems some of the women showing off their butts are doing it on purpose and I’m always afraid to say anything. I have helped out a sister at a bar with her dress tucked into her panty hose. After a few drinks we tend to get forgetful of zippers and panty hose. I was walking Percy and stopped on the train platform to watch the train and a woman was sitting on the bench with a very short skirt. We were chatting and she spead her legs and I could see her undies. I looked away and moved down the platform. I don’t know what that was about and I think she was either being vulgar or just forgot she was wearing a mini skirt? ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2010, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/71 "2010-07-13T04:29:46Z")
I met a gal named Cahuenga, who was speaking at an AA meeting in front of about 300 people. Right before she took the stage, she came about of the ladies room with her skirt tucked I to the back of her pantyhose (and she was not a slim woman). A stranger grabbed her & explained the situation. Cahuenga laughed her not-insubstantial ass of, and opened her pitch from the podium with the story. I’d tell because I’d want to be told. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2010, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/72 "2010-07-13T09:53:56Z")
Walk over and poke her in the butt. The cops will totally accept that you were just trying to help. ---
**Author:** ![Mooch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mooch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mooch)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/73 "2010-07-16T15:53:19Z")
You could just pull the dress out of her panties for her. If she acts offended, obviously she wanted it that way so you should put it back the way you found it. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/74 "2010-07-16T19:52:51Z")
Write a post-it note and stick it on her buttcheek. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/75 "2010-07-16T20:24:56Z")
Anything that can be corrected quickly should be warned of. A quiet but urgent “Pardon me, I think your dress is askew in the back” is a good way of doing it. ---
**Author:** ![dba\_Fred](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c37758/32.png) [@dba\_Fred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dba_Fred)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2010, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/76 "2010-07-17T00:06:54Z")
I keep a stack of dollar bills to slip into the waistband for just such [del]opportunities[/del] occasions. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2010, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/77 "2010-07-17T03:47:38Z")
Excuse me but your ass looks fat, and it’s not your pants. Why don’t we see how it looks in pants. ---
**Author:** ![EMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@EMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EMark)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2010, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/78 "2010-07-22T21:41:45Z")
Yes, but after. As in realize to her the situation, don’t walk up and announce. I have encountered the dillema several times…The first, an office manager obviously unaccustomed to wearing a skirt verging on mini, and no privacy screen in front of her desk. And wearing hollywood knickers. I let her know when I exited by the early request of a sticky note, and put it on the back of her chair before I walked out. Second time was a cycle rider in a cotton pleat, and was showing a lot more than I believe she intended. Happenstance, we stopped at the same fuel station, and I asked her if it was a new way to avoid tan lines…She bought a pack of safety pins and pinned the hem to the top of her chaps. Could be they want to, in some cases…so watch out. M. ---
**Author:** ![Kilmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a6a055/32.png) [@Kilmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilmore)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2010, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557/79 "2010-07-23T04:53:52Z")
Take a picture with your cell phone and show it to her. NOTE: This advice is not actually recommended. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-etiquette-question-how-do-you-tell-a-complete-stranger-her-butt-is-showing/541557.md?page=3)