# An Instrumental Wish
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [November 18, 2015, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892 "2015-11-18T15:49:27Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/1 "2015-11-18T15:49:27Z")
If you could become an absolute master of any one musical instrument(the vocal chords do _not_ count), which would you choose? Bass guitar? Pan flute? Piano? Bagpipe? Tuba? Mandolin? Ukulele? Theremin? What common(or uncommon) musical tool would _you_ pick to play to perfection?
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### Author:  [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/2 "2015-11-18T15:53:08Z")
As a guitarist, I think my choice is clear. I would love, however, to be an excellent piano player. Man, if I could pump out some fine boogie woogie, I would be a very happy man.
An example from a master, Pete Johnson: [- YouTube](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NIY4liCstOE)
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### Author:  [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/3 "2015-11-18T15:55:02Z")
Were I still young it would be the guitar, or maybe the sax. For overall practical purposes I guess the piano. I assume that would give me decent proficiency with other keyboard instruments as well.
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### Author:  [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/4 "2015-11-18T15:55:04Z")
12 string electric guitar. Saw Alex Lifeson of Rush do some amazing things on one.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/5 "2015-11-18T16:06:52Z")
I would like to master one the most complicated instruments ever created, [the pipe organ.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pipe_organ)
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### Author:  [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/6 "2015-11-18T16:07:15Z")
Cello. Six weeks ago, on my 70th birthday, I began teaching myself cello. Obviously I’ll never be an “absolute master;” to be that would be way cool.
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### Author:  [@fachverwirrt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fachverwirrt)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/7 "2015-11-18T16:18:30Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> (the vocal chords do _not_ count)
How about vocal cords? Do they count?
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### Author:  [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/8 "2015-11-18T16:20:08Z")
What if I’m already a master at a musical instrument?
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### Author:  [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/9 "2015-11-18T16:22:33Z")
There’s already a master of the pan flute, so not much point to that one.
I’d go with piano. You could walk in and take over anyplace with a piano in it.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/10 "2015-11-18T16:33:13Z")
> [@fachverwirrt](#):
>
> How about vocal cords? Do they count?
Nope. Neither do Alex Cords or Cordon Bleu.
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### Author:  [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/11 "2015-11-18T16:34:38Z")
Not even \*chicken \*cordon blue? Philistine!
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### Author:  [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/12 "2015-11-18T16:40:56Z")
I woulda said piano, because who doesn’t like piano?
But I think it would be more impressive to see a fat middle-aged lady like me be the rockingist rock drummer that ever rocked. Like, Bonham-level of rockness, or Peart-level. You just don’t see that every day!
I also would not mind the upper body strength that came with it. And everybody’s always looking for a good drummer.
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### Author:  [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/13 "2015-11-18T16:43:26Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#):
>
> …everybody’s always looking for a good drummer.
…Nah. Too easy.
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### Author:  [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/14 "2015-11-18T16:46:54Z")
> [@Knorf](#):
>
> What if I’m already a master at a musical instrument?
Comb and tissue paper? That would be me. 🙂
> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> I would like to master one the most complicated instruments ever created, [the pipe organ.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pipe_organ)
Want to _really_ challenge yourself? Master one you have to pump with your feet! :eek:
**Zipper JJ** , YouTube “Karen Carpenter drumming”; impressive.
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### Author:  [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/15 "2015-11-18T17:13:34Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#):
>
> Comb and tissue paper? That would be me. 🙂
No actually: a legit instrument.
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### Author:  [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/16 "2015-11-18T17:15:25Z")
Nah, **Czarcasm** isn’t interested in a little parlor organ. He wants one of the Big Boys, with at least four ranks of keyboards, 32-foot pipes, and a bellows powered either by electricity or a small ragamuffin.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/17 "2015-11-18T17:27:12Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#):
>
> Nah, **Czarcasm** isn’t interested in a little parlor organ. He wants one of the Big Boys, with at least four ranks of keyboards, 32-foot pipes, and a bellows powered either by electricity or a small ragamuffin.
Damnright! _All_ the bells and whistlestops.
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### Author:  [@fachverwirrt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fachverwirrt)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/18 "2015-11-18T17:34:12Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#):
>
> Nah, **Czarcasm** isn’t interested in a little parlor organ. He wants one of the Big Boys, with at least four ranks of keyboards, 32-foot pipes, and a bellows powered either by electricity or a small ragamuffin.
Just 32s? Pfft. Real organists play 64s.
(Granted most 64s are just capped 32s. But those babies _rumble_.)
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### Author:  [@ThisSpaceForRent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThisSpaceForRent)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/19 "2015-11-18T17:41:45Z")
My dad was a MASTER at piano and pipe organ. He could play the hell out of the organ and did so every sunday at church. The nuns told him he was to "peppy.
Me, I would love to be a master of the Banjo…Blue grass, New Grass, polyethnic cajun slamgrass…it all makes me smile. I would be called “Banjovie”
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2015, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-instrumental-wish/737892/20 "2015-11-18T17:51:18Z")
[Carillon](http://www.castinbronze.net/)
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