# An open letter to Ambivalid **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 30, 2019, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248 "2019-04-30T06:17:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/161 "2019-05-06T06:04:27Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > “blow your tiny little mind” is just a turn of phrase, not a personal insult. > > If I wanted to insult you, I’d be a lot less subtle about it. You tedious cunt. Uh huh. “Blow your tiny mind”, regardless of it’s origin, is _of course_ just a way of saying “you’re an idiot”. Insult? Check. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/162 "2019-05-06T08:29:55Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Uh huh. “Blow your tiny mind”, regardless of it’s origin, is _of course_ just a way of saying “you’re an idiot”. [Naah](https://www.google.com/search?q=blow+your+tiny+little+mind&oq=bl&aqs=chrome.0.69i59j69i60l3j69i65j69i57.4145j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8), it’s just the language of clickbait. But insisting it has to be a directed insult _is_ a good way of saying “_ **I** _ am an idiot”, so …well done, genius, I guess? ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/163 "2019-05-06T08:55:51Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > [Naah](https://www.google.com/search?q=blow+your+tiny+little+mind&oq=bl&aqs=chrome.0.69i59j69i60l3j69i65j69i57.4145j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8), it’s just the language of clickbait. But insisting it has to be a directed insult _is_ a good way of saying “_ **I** _ am an idiot”, so …well done, genius, I guess? Cool beans dude. Like I said, it doesn’t matter _where it came from_, you using it here the way you did was obviously only done to insult. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/164 "2019-05-06T09:05:04Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Cool beans dude. Like I said, it doesn’t matter _where it came from_, you using it here the way you did was obviously only done to insult. Like I said, if I wanted to insult you in the Pit, I wouldn’t use clickbait headlines to do it, you stupid motherfucker. You read intent in posting about as well as you read homosexuality in mannerisms…which is only \*marginally \*better than you run marathons. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 9:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/165 "2019-05-06T09:27:03Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Like I said, if I wanted to insult you in the Pit, I wouldn’t use clickbait headlines to do it, you stupid motherfucker. You read intent in posting about as well as you read homosexuality in mannerisms…which is only \*marginally \*better than you run marathons. Sorry im not familiar with all your internet slang. I don’t think I’m in the minority when it comes to regarding a statement with “your small mind” in it as amything but a slight. And you’ll have to teach me how to better read homosexuality in mannerisms then. Smh. ETA: And you did not post a headline or a link, you just wrote the words, devoid of context. _That’s_ what makes it an insult. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 9:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/166 "2019-05-06T09:37:04Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Sorry im not familiar with all your internet slang. …said the brainless asshat, _posting on the internet_. but here’s some free advice re: reading gay mannerisms- if you’re not actively cruising for a piece of ass, just don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/167 "2019-05-06T09:51:41Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > …said the brainless asshat, _posting on the internet_. > > but here’s some free advice re: reading gay mannerisms- if you’re not actively cruising for a piece of ass, just don’t. I only said teach me because you said I was so bad at it, comparing it to how well I interpret your posts. The implication being that I can improve in my ability to read homosexuality in mannerisms. I guess you didnt write what you meant to say? ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/168 "2019-05-06T11:45:03Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I only said teach me because you said I was so bad at it, comparing it to how well I interpret your posts. The implication being that I can improve in my ability to read homosexuality in mannerisms. Naah, the implication was you’re so shite (at both things), you should _just stop doing them_. There, see, _that’s_ how crap you are at interpreting posts. That’s not something you can ever improve, that’s some deep-down, \*congenital \*stupidity. Which, ya know, was already obvious for anyone even peripherally aware of your sad life story, but by all means, keep reminding us… ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/169 "2019-05-06T13:08:24Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Naah, the implication was you’re so shite (at both things), you should _just stop doing them_. There, see, _that’s_ how crap you are at interpreting posts. That’s not something you can ever improve, that’s some deep-down, \*congenital \*stupidity. Which, ya know, was already obvious for anyone even peripherally aware of your sad life story, but by all means, keep reminding us… Ill let others decide for themselves whose interpretation make more sense. Based on your own words. > [@MrDibble](#): > > You read intent in posting about as well as you read homosexuality in mannerisms If you tell me that I’m really bad at discerning intent in posts, that says to me that you think you are much better at it than me. So when you compare my skills in reading posts to my “skills” in reading sexuality in mannerisms, the logical conclusion is to assume that reading sexuality in mannerisms is also something you are much better at than me. ETA: Taken to its conclusion, it says that you believe sexuality _is_ something that can be discerned thru mannerisms, speech, etc. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/170 "2019-05-06T13:59:51Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > If you tell me that I’m really bad at discerning intent in posts, that says to me that you think you are much better at it than me. No, it means \*I know \*what the intent of my first post was, and you sucked at reading it when you interpreted it as a personal insult, just like you now, (again! What’s that, 3 in a row?) sucked at reading what I meant when I said you sucked at reading intent. Nothing about \*my \*skill at anything was implied in anything I said. You suck so much, I’m going to call you Dyson from now on. You cool with that, **Dyson**? ERA: and no, you can’t reliably discern sexuality through mannerisms. Or speech, unless that speech is “I’m gay!” or something in Beulah or Polari. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/171 "2019-05-06T14:16:07Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > No, it means \*I know \*what the intent of my first post was, and you sucked at reading it when you interpreted it as a personal insult, just like you now, (again! What’s that, 3 in a row?) sucked at reading what I meant when I said you sucked at reading intent. Nothing about \*my \*skill at anything was implied in anything I said. > > You suck so much, I’m going to call you Dyson from now on. You cool with that, **Dyson**? > > ERA: and no, you can’t reliably discern sexuality through mannerisms. Or speech, unless that speech is “I’m gay!” or something in Beulah or Polari. Okie dokie smokie. And ok, you may not have implied _you_ were much better at the things you said I was bad at but yeah, ya did imply i had room for improvement in both those activities. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/172 "2019-05-06T14:25:07Z")
No, I just said you sucked, I didn’t say anything that indicated I had any confidence you have the capacity for improvement in either field. Because you are both truly, truly stupid, and yet also \*stubbornly \*invested in not recognizing how \*monumentally \*stupid you are. But I guess if you didn’t take the lesson when the Universe tried to beat it into you with a tree at age 20, none of us should expect you to get it now. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/173 "2019-05-06T14:26:10Z")
Nice chat buddy. I feel like I made a friend. But I must cease and desist with our little friendly row. I grow weary. ETA: And protest and deny as much as you want, you said what you said. Just shut up and own it. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/174 "2019-05-06T16:18:23Z")
So much for growing weary - still time for that last punch, eh? _Of course_ I said what I said. Post’s right there, after all, and redundancy is still redundancy. What I didn’t \*mean \*was what you \*thought \*(for want of a better word) I meant. Your knee jerks surprisingly well, considering. You should try owning _that_. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/175 "2019-05-06T17:18:57Z")
OK, I’ll pay for the room. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/176 "2019-05-06T19:42:50Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I’d say no. While there is a _tiny_ bit of a lispy voice i dont see much of any of the other cues, the mannerisms, the body language. He very well may be gay or he very well may be straight. From a superficial viewpoint he seems as gay as anyone. He has a soft voice with a massive lisp, with feminine mannerisms. At this point I’m honestly not sure how you even judge such things. (Oh and he’s straight; married once to a woman and has a son from that marriage.) ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/177 "2019-05-06T20:39:34Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > I’m honestly not sure how you even judge such things. We see things differently, clearly. But the gentleman in that link didn’t have any of the mannerisms or body language (or not enough to be convincing) similar to the whole range of cues I’ve observed in the men I’ve believed were gay throughout my life. Given the fact that I’ve never been _shown_ to be wrong even once in my RL and I’ve had my beliefs confirmed numerous times, it’s been an influencing factor when interpreting such things as the Tupac interview. I’m not clear on how i am supposed to avoid such influences. Sure, I can be _academically_ aware that what I’m doing is not good practice and not a good way of judging people, I can’t _make_ myself just evaporate that lifetime of experience. I need more and broader experiences in the world. You yourself had to experience being wrong before you were able to internalize the same lesson everyone iseems to be trying to just repeat to me until i parrot it back to them. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/178 "2019-05-06T21:13:21Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Sure, I can be _academically_ aware that what I’m doing is not good practice and not a good way of judging people, I can’t _make_ myself just evaporate that lifetime of experience. I need more and broader experiences in the world … That exact situation has been addressed for you several times, [such as here](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21617842&postcount=60). The advice you were given was that maybe \*\*you should keep your fucking mouth shut until you figure out how to do that. \*\* And yet, as with the Tupac thread which started all this bullshit – the thread that you promised to leave but didn’t – and now in this one, you just can’t seem to shut up about it. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/179 "2019-05-06T22:13:35Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > That exact situation has been addressed for you several times, [such as here](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21617842&postcount=60). The advice you were given was that maybe \*\*you should keep your fucking mouth shut until you figure out how to do that. \*\* > > And yet, as with the Tupac thread which started all this bullshit – the thread that you promised to leave but didn’t – and now in this one, you just can’t seem to shut up about it. I acknowledged over and over that I made a mistake in posting that OP. You all are quite right, i should have kept my mouth shut. But the vitriol is misplaced. I only continue to post in yhis thread because i feel the need to defend my words from slanderous misinterpretations from a select few posters. And i dont see how your link is in any way addressing the issue it was responding to. Someone telling me to keep my mouth shut doesnt do anything to dispel a lifetime of experience. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2019, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248/180 "2019-05-06T23:50:59Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Your [fainting-couch schtick about androgynous-looking Kpop stars](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=874976) is tiresome too. _“Oh no, the boys look quite a bit like girls! How incomprehensible and terrifying!”_ :rolleyes: Those androgynous Kpop stars are looking way manlier than your sorry pearl-clutching ass is right now. Oh come on. First of all, no points for accuracy. And that was more satire than anything. I had never heard of kpop prior to googling BTS, so it was _humorous_ to me when i saw them. I dont have the slightest of negative or ambivalent feelings towards androgynous males. The “horror” i expressed was not that these performers were actually girls or boys but rather artificial sentient life forms that had evolved from advertisements to in order to better reach us and sell us shit (thank you south park) > [@](#): > > Watching that damn video, I had no fucking clue whether i was watching a boy band, a girl band or a clay band. I couldnt shake myself of the terrifying certainty that underneath those garish outfits, everything was smooth. Everything . As you see, I was expressing “horror” (in a _quite_ tongue in cheek manner, btw) at the thought that these were not actually human beings. If I was on some sort of “ewww, those boys look like girls!!!” schtick, I would have expressed that very sentiment somewhere in the thread. I expressed no such sentiment. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-ambivalid/833248.md?page=10)