# An open letter to CG's Boss:Mullets aren't a crime! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 9, 2003, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521 "2003-01-09T14:59:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/1 "2003-01-09T14:59:53Z")
Dear asshat™boss person, Having a mullet in this day and extremely fashionable age is NOT a crime ya know.:)CG happens to be one of the few people I know who actually look good in a modified mullet.I like it when he has longish hair.It gives me something to uh…play with.:)I am writing you this pissed off rant-y letter because you made a stupid bet with him and when he lost,you made him promise to get a ‘real’ haircut,which he did and now makes him look like a dark-haired Q-tip. Seriously. 😃 I’d love it if you at least apologized for making him cut his hair. Thanks a ton. IDBB ---
**Author:** ![NYR407](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbe5ce/32.png) [@NYR407](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NYR407)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/2 "2003-01-09T15:06:17Z")
Mullets are a crime…to the fashion police. ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/3 "2003-01-09T15:08:44Z")
[Yes](http://www.mulletsgalore.com/) they are…by all that is holy and good. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/4 "2003-01-09T15:18:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by I\_Dig\_Bad\_Boys \* > **Having a mullet in this day and extremely fashionable age is NOT a crime ya know.** It should be. > [@](#): > > \*\*CG happens to be one of the few people I know who actually look good in a modified mullet. \*\* _ **Nobody** _ looks good with a mullet. NOBODY. ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/5 "2003-01-09T15:24:11Z")
More a crime against nature itself. What came first-- the mullet or the Trans Am? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/6 "2003-01-09T15:28:29Z")
Friends don’t let friends wear mullets. ---
**Author:** ![jk1245](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/49beb7/32.png) [@jk1245](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jk1245)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/7 "2003-01-09T16:10:58Z")
[This mullet](http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/endmugs7.html) most certainly _is_ a crime. Look, he was even booked for it. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/8 "2003-01-09T16:13:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jk1245 \* > \*\*[This mullet](http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/endmugs7.html) most certainly _is_ a crime. Look, he was even booked for it. \*\* Ugh :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/9 "2003-01-09T16:13:27Z")
Should people with mullets be allowed to adopt? ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/10 "2003-01-09T16:25:13Z")
Please, please don’t tell me that the mullet is becoming fashionable again!!! ---
**Author:** ![Bubble\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c0e974/32.png) [@Bubble\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bubble_Girl)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/11 "2003-01-09T16:26:48Z")
You’re right. Having a mullet is not a crime. But anyone that does have one in this day and age looks like a fucking idiot. Have you not seen the movie “Joe Dirt”? ---
**Author:** ![NYR407](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbe5ce/32.png) [@NYR407](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NYR407)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/12 "2003-01-09T16:38:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dangerosa \* > \*\*Please, please don’t tell me that the mullet is becoming fashionable again!!! \*\* When was a mullet fashionable? I must have slept in that day. ---
**Author:** ![Swampwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Swampwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swampwolf)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/13 "2003-01-09T17:09:27Z")
Your honor, I’d like to provide the following [evidence](http://www07.homepage.villanova.edu/sean.keith/webstuff1/mullet_family_and_mullet_man.htm) which shows, without a doubt, that mullets are a crime against nature, even if not a crime against man. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/14 "2003-01-09T17:11:18Z")
[sub] God, I love it when someone picks up the straight line I wrote and gives me back the proper punch line. [/sub] ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/15 "2003-01-09T17:23:59Z")
_Look at me, I’m a bait fish."_ ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/16 "2003-01-09T17:30:20Z")
A bet’s a bet. Apart from the (highly questionable) asthetic claims from the OP, the winner of a wager has no obligation to apologize to the loser for collecting. ---
**Author:** ![cowgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@cowgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cowgirl)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/17 "2003-01-09T17:46:41Z")
Count me in the ‘Mullets are Always a Crime’ camp. But of course I have never seen CG and so acknowledge there may be exceptions. I remember several incidents of people with heinous moustaches who, when shaved, looked even worse. So I am willing to reserve judgement until … **I\_Dig** posts Before and After pics of CG’s haircut so we can judge for ourselves. If that’s not an option, can you address the following: Mullets are made worse by several factors: [ul] [li] baldness on top[/li][li] ponytail[/li][li] baldness on top COMBINED with a ponytail[/li][li] hairsprayed bangs (more of a female mullet thing, i know)[/li][li] if it looks like LegoHair (ie if it looks like you could lift the hair off the head in one unit)[/ul][/li] if none of these were involved, the criminality of the mullet is lessened, I think. I have never seen a good-looking mullet but I would love to be enlightened. Particularly about what ‘modified’ refers to … ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/18 "2003-01-09T18:03:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by blessedwolf \* > \*\*Your honor, I’d like to provide the following [evidence](http://www07.homepage.villanova.edu/sean.keith/webstuff1/mullet_family_and_mullet_man.htm) which shows, without a doubt, that mullets are a crime against nature, even if not a crime against man. \*\* What the fuck. Give us some kind of warning in the future. I’m not sure what is going on in that picture, but I’m certain it is not legal in the state of NY. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/19 "2003-01-09T18:04:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NYR407 \* > \*\*When was a mullet fashionable? \*\* [Circa 1780](http://gcweb.gc.maricopa.edu/socsci/his/Franklin.jpg). 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521/20 "2003-01-09T18:10:52Z")
So, **cowgirl,** what you see to be saying is that the wearing of a mullet is a simple misdemeanor, whereas the elevation of said mullet to the status of Cletus Hair makes it a felony. (For Canadians, this means that anyone simply wearing hockey hair is committing a summary offense; if it’s graduated to the level of a Sharbot Lake Special, it’s a criminal offense.) I would suggest that anyone caught wearing a mullet, while also wearing blue jeans but not wearing a shirt, at any event involving men driving 4-wheeled ATVs should simply be executed without trial. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-cgs-boss-mullets-arent-a-crime/147521.md?page=2)