# An Open Letter To Mackenzie Bezos **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 16, 2019, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848 "2019-01-16T03:36:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![brujaja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@brujaja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brujaja)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/1 "2019-01-16T03:36:44Z")
Dear Mackenzie, I had never heard of you before. I didn’t even know Jeff Bezos was married until this story broke. It’s a hell of a way to find out, and I certainly hope you had a little more warning than the rest of us. Even so, it had to have been a shock to you no matter what the circumstances. Your life and mine are radically different; and yet somehow I think our experience as women and as humans converges in the spectrum of feelings you are probably going through at this time. The details vary, of course, but I believe that I know the kind of conflicting emotions you have had to face and conquer. Although you have the buffer of enormous wealth to shield you, I don’t think your journey in this sense is essentially different from that of myself and every other woman who has been there. So I simply want to tell you this: living well is the best revenge, and now that I know your name, let’s see it in the news in ways that startle and dazzle us! You can be an amazing inspiration if you so desire. You can be the hero that Jeff Bezos doesn’t have it in himself to be. You can be a household name, beloved of the people. Speak out! Use some of your fortune to make statements about how you really feel inside. Show us that great wealth and genuine benevolence are not mutually exclusive. The whole world is aching for a person of wealth and influence who is not a common and venal disappointment, but a shining example of how to honor your blessings by lifting those around you. No one lives in a vacuum. Sincerely, brujaja ---
**Author:** ![Ashtura](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ashtura/32/2963_2.png) [@Ashtura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashtura)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/2 "2019-01-16T03:46:42Z")
My open letter: Mackenzie: Call me. Sincerely, Ashtura ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/3 "2019-01-16T03:55:04Z")
My open letter: Dear resident, You have been pre-qualified for your very own Faulknercard! Be the envy of your friends when they learn of all the benefits Faulknercard affords you! …etc. I’m too lazy to take this further. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/4 "2019-01-16T03:57:09Z")
Dear Mackenzie, “Mackenzie” is not a girl’s name. Signed, Mackenzie (boy) ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/5 "2019-01-16T03:58:45Z")
Bill Gates, George Soros and Elon Musk use their wealth for good. There are wealthy people who set a good example for the world. ---
**Author:** ![brujaja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@brujaja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brujaja)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/6 "2019-01-16T04:01:12Z")
> [@Wesley\_Clark](#): > > Bill Gates, George Soros and Elon Musk use their wealth for good. > > There are wealthy people who set a good example for the world. Don’t start me on Bill Gates. As I have said elsewhere, I would much rather he hadn’t been a monopolistic asshat in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/7 "2019-01-16T04:02:20Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Dear Mackenzie, > > “Mackenzie” is not a girl’s name. > > Signed, > Mackenzie (boy) Dear Mackenzie, Mackenzie Phillips would like to speak with you. Signed, A guy who has no dog in this fight ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/8 "2019-01-16T04:07:48Z")
I misread the thread title as _“Dear McKenzie Bros”_…boy was I disappointed. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/9 "2019-01-16T04:14:39Z")
Did I miss the news stories exposing evil Jeff’s abusive behavior toward his angelic wife? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/10 "2019-01-16T04:15:35Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > Dear Mackenzie, > > Mackenzie Phillips would like to speak with you. > > Signed, > A guy who has no dog in this fight I am 100% prepared to fight Mackenzie Phillips on this issue. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/11 "2019-01-16T04:16:08Z")
nm ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/12 "2019-01-16T04:21:58Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > Mackenzie Phillips would like to speak with you. And she divorced a guy named Jeff… ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/13 "2019-01-16T04:22:14Z")
You write it, I’ll deliver it. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/14 "2019-01-16T04:25:45Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > You write it, I’ll deliver it. Just slip it inside the box next time you return something. ---
**Author:** ![Lamoral](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lamoral/32/16078_2.png) [@Lamoral](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamoral)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/15 "2019-01-16T04:37:14Z")
Dear Mackenzie Bezos, I really want them to bring back _Mad Men_. It’s such an awesome show and I am not content to only have seven seasons of it. What I’m thinking, is it could pick right up where it left off, with all the same characters working at the same company. Except it needs to go on up until at least the early 1990s. I’m thinking five more seasons would do the trick. I want it to go through all the decades, the 70s, the 80s, and the 90s, with the fashions, grooming, cars, furniture, _everything,_ changing with the times. I want to see the disco era. I want to see the New Wave era. I want to see the birth of personal computers and the internet. I want to see all of that, with all the original characters from the original show living through it and creating ads for all of the iconic products over the course of those years. I want all the same actors, the same director, all the same writers and producers, everything. Basically just make this happen, please. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/16 "2019-01-16T15:52:45Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > Just slip it inside the box next time you return something. Half right. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/17 "2019-01-16T17:48:23Z")
A [letter opener](https://www.stillfried.com/products/carl-aubock-letteropener-hand-7208) for Mackenzie Bezos. (it was the most expensive one I could quickly find) ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/18 "2019-01-16T19:20:55Z")
I haven’t followed her career lately, but she did a good job as Ruthie on _7th Heaven_. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/19 "2019-01-16T19:27:50Z")
So, uh, what exactly did the two of them divorce over? ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2019, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848/20 "2019-01-16T19:28:42Z")
Some stories have it that Jeff was parking his car in somebody else’s garage. You know, the usual. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-mackenzie-bezos/827848.md?page=2)