# An open letter to my red-neck mother **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 26, 2003, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065 "2003-01-26T17:39:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/1 "2003-01-26T17:39:13Z")
_The only reason I am posting this here is because I love my mother but HATE HATE HATE her meddling ways.I don’t want to hurt her feelings but if I don’t say something about this to SOMEBODY I’m gonna explode._ Dear Mom, yes I realize you are concerned about my current state of jobless-ness. I know that you are ‘praying for me’, which I’m not sure will even work because I am pagan(oops…I’m sorry.You weren’t supposed to find that out yet.). I know you want me to whore myself out to Kelly Girls the way you did when you were my age a nd out of work. I know you’d like me to go visit your friend’s sister’s brother’s mother’s aunt’s cousin’s uncle’s grandmother’s father’s sister’s uncle who works as a financier at the Bank of Redneckville to refinance the house so that we don’t have to pay as much and therefore,hopefully alieve some of our monthly debts. I know you want to help me find a job but I am a big girl and I can do it on my own, like I always have. Just like when I lived at home and you were depressed and slept all the time and I took care of the entire house by myself. I love you, Mom, but you are a meddling redneck who really gets on my nerves. I’m sure one day I’ll appreciate you meddling into my life and trying to make me like you. Love your daughter, IDBB ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/2 "2003-01-26T17:56:06Z")
You know, it’s OK to vent one’s frustrations in the Pit when life is grinding one down. Jah knows I do it myself. But, **IDBB** , sugar, you have more issues than than a doctor’s waiting room and a significant lack of maturity in how you handle the occasional razor blade in the candy floss of life. I mean, you’re jobless, but you refuse to get a temp job, er, “whore [your]self out to Kelly Girls” or “to go visit your friend’s sister’s brother’s mother’s aunt’s cousin’s uncle’s grandmother’s father’s sister’s uncle who works as a financier at the Bank of Redneckville to refinance the house so that [you] don’t have to pay as much and therefore, hopefully, [re]lieve some of [y]our monthly debts.” Shut up and deal already. Part of being “a big girl” is that sometimes you have to do things you would rather not do. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/3 "2003-01-26T18:01:41Z")
I agree with **Gobear**. It doesn’t sound like she’s trying to control you so much as just give you some practical help. There’s nothing wrong with temp work. Take what you can get. ---
**Author:** ![JeffB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jeffb/32/188_2.png) [@JeffB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JeffB)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/4 "2003-01-26T18:07:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by I\_Dig\_Bad\_Boys \* > I know you want me to whore myself out to Kelly Girls the way you did when you were my age a nd out of work. Damn, now I know where to hire temps from. ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/5 "2003-01-26T18:08:17Z")
I wouldn’t mind her trying to help if she wasn’t so damned insistant.😃 She’s been calling me at least twice daily since she found out I lost my job with crackpot schemes as to how I can find a job and make ‘the big money’ as she calls it. I love her, I’m just sick of her interference at this point. IDBB ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/6 "2003-01-26T18:10:32Z")
Oh, quit being such sanctimonious twats. Regardless of her mother’s motives, the fact remains that the advice is unsolicited and apparently unwanted. People who insist on giving unsolicted, unwanted advice (no matter how practical the advice may be) are pains in the ass. What do Dopers do about pains in the ass? We vent about them in the Pit. Frankly, it’s presumptuous and assinine to make statements about someone’s maturity level based on one short post. The OP is a grown woman, capable of making her own decisions, good or bad, without anyone else butting in. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/7 "2003-01-26T18:15:01Z")
Yeah, but the whole purpose of being a parent is to give unsolicited and apparently unwanted advice. (Or so I’m told.) ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/8 "2003-01-26T18:16:54Z")
Thank you, **CrazyCatLady**!!! If I didn’t love my mother, I would tell her all that stuff in the OP and get her off my back. BUT because I love her and wouldn’t want to hurt her feelings (or risk my status of Best Grandchild with my grandmother),I’m not going to say those things to her.It would be rude and unkind. Besides…if I said something like that to her,I’d lose my place as Best Grandchild with my grandmother and that would truly suck.🙂 IDBB ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/9 "2003-01-26T18:19:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh, quit being such sanctimonious twats. As a male, I insist on being called a sanctimonious dick, thankyouverymuch! > [@](#): > > Frankly, it’s presumptuous and assinine to make statements about someone’s maturity level based on one short post. You obviously haven’t paying attention. [She](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=158148) [Whines](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=157910) [A](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=158110) [Lot](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=153235) ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/10 "2003-01-26T18:25:43Z")
Ok wait…how is [a href=“[http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=153235](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=153235)”]this[/a] whining, gobear? IDBB ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/11 "2003-01-26T18:27:50Z")
I find it deeply ironic that someone who supports the Mullet as a respectable hairstyle would have the audacity to call someone _else_ a redneck. We need a Mullet smilie ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/12 "2003-01-26T18:31:28Z")
I am not opposed to rednecks, **Homebrew**. In fact, while in HS, I was known to occasionally dress as a ‘kicker’(our term for rednecks).Heck…I even went so far as to show up at the end-of-year Drama ball dressed to the redneck nines in a pair of highly polished pastel pink boots(yes…pastel pink),pressed and starched black jeans, a pressed white tuxedo shirt, pastel pink bowtie and black felt cowboy hat.🙂 IDBB(who is goth on the outside and partly redneck on the inside) ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/13 "2003-01-26T18:32:52Z")
Because you posted a snuivleiing rant about magically not appearing on the B&N schedule. Something in your rant didn’t ring true in how B&N management works. In any event, take a temp job if that’s what you have to do. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/14 "2003-01-26T18:37:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CrazyCatLady \* > \*\*Oh, quit being such sanctimonious twats. Regardless of her mother’s motives, the fact remains that the advice is unsolicited and apparently unwanted. People who insist on giving unsolicted, unwanted advice (no matter how practical the advice may be) are pains in the ass. \*\* FWIW, the things IDBB’s mother is saying sounds like damn good advice, and, if nagging is the only way to get IDBB to get off her ass and do these good things, I’m all for Mom calling 2, 3, 4 times a day until they get done. You wanna stop her meddling, then grow up, take responsibility, and take good advice. -Hamlet, whose mom had to kick him in the ass on more than one occasion. ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/15 "2003-01-26T18:38:01Z")
**gobear** –I am prepared to take any job that comes my way.I even went so far as to go crawling back to Godiva and ask for a job(which wasn’t available according to the ass’t mgr whom I talked to yesterday). Perhaps something ‘didn’t ring true in how B&N mangament works’ because all stores are different. Yes, I realize they have guidlines to go by but all mgrs are different which means they do things their own way as long as it’s sorta by the guidlines. The mgrs at the one I worked at were (for the most part)very, very nice and always willing to help me out whenever I did something wrong or needed to ask a question. The other booksellers were also very VERY nice and one even told me she’d miss me when I was gone because she liked working with me so much. I had nothing bad to say about that store in my rant, other than it was rather rude (IMO) to lead me on and let me believe I was permanent when in fact I was only seasonal. IDBB ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/16 "2003-01-26T18:39:51Z")
“goth on the outside and partly redneck on the inside” Not to poke fun at someone’s personal style, but I find this paints a uniquely disturbing picture. _attempts to drown visions of square dancing goths in thick brown liquor_ ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/17 "2003-01-26T18:40:23Z")
> [@](#): > > I am prepared to take any job that comes my way That’s not what you said in the OP, in re “whoring” yourself out to Kelly Girls. ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/18 "2003-01-26T18:45:25Z")
Ok…any job except that,I should’ve said. I apologize. **Waverly** –yes I am goth but I cannot deny my very decidely redneck roots…hence the ‘goth on the outside,partly redneck on the inside’. I admit to being a bit of a redneck. I come from a loooong line of true rednecks and cannot deny it. I occassionally listen to country music, long for a pickup truck,a gun rack and a gun (or guns) to go with it.My friends say I am inordinately proud to be a native Texan. If that don’t make me partially redneck, I don’t know what does.😃 IDBB ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/19 "2003-01-26T18:50:35Z")
The fact of the matter is, with Kelly or any other temp agency, you still don’t necessarily have a job. I registered with one nearly 3 months ago, and have yet to land my first assignment. If I ever do get an assignment, it can end at any time without prior notice. I, however, can’t leave an assignment till it’s over. If I get offered a permanent job at higher pay, too damn bad. I’m pretty sure IDBB meant that she’d take any _permanent_ job that came her way. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2003, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065/20 "2003-01-26T18:51:38Z")
Oh, well, I guess I should start previewing before I hit “Submit”. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-open-letter-to-my-red-neck-mother/151065.md?page=2)