# An SDMB test of astral projection **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [December 3, 2003, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696 "2003-12-03T12:34:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![umop\_ap\_sdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/dbc845/32.png) [@umop\_ap\_sdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/umop_ap_sdn)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/221 "2003-12-25T08:04:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jess \* > \*\*I really did make an attempt to astrally project myself. I tried to empty my mind and _send_ it to **glee** ’s desk. I actually thought, “ **Glee** ’s desk, **glee** ’s desk…” \*\* If it was that easy, the test would be finished by now. 🙂 I have to wonder what would have gone through your mind had you started to float out. Clearing the mind alone in silence is one thing, but keeping it clear while you feel like you’re flying away is quite another, and that’s what I’ve been having difficulty with. ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/222 "2003-12-26T11:08:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by glee \* > I’m sorry, I seem to have _completely_ lost my train of thought :smack: Uh…what? Did you just say something? > [@](#): > > Blimey, Jess is female? Ah well, I have a rigid rule to only flirt with one female per thread. Although I employed no psychic powers to deduce **Jess’s** gender, I believe my intuitive powers to be reliable here. I am glad you are a faithful flirt. > [@](#): > > IWLN, if you have looked at my desk already, **you** should be investigated thoroughly by me … errr … :o Sylvia Brown, get ready for some stiff competition, because I know what this man’s thinking!!!:o **The Great Unwashed** , I’m sorry to succumb to the irrestistable urge to flirt again. I know it offends your scientific sensibilities. I am alas, a weak woman. But **glee** is just so darn cute and uh…it’s hard to know what else to do when you’re waiting for someone to Astraly Project. There is no previous scientific protocol for “AP watching” that I know of. I considered a rousing game of cards, but it just doesn’t have the same lure. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/223 "2003-12-26T12:26:24Z")
I’m not a psychic and I don’t play one on TV, but I thought “Wot th’ hell” and, after massaging my temples and thinking psychic thoughts, I tried to astral project. Here’s what I came up with. 1. The Ark of the Covenant. (not a replica…the real thing). It’s pretty big and takes up a lot of the desk. 2. The egg of the phoenix. 3. Two books by L. Frank Baum from a parallel universe (“The Silver Sorceress of Oz” and “Queen Zixi in Oz”) _4) A pair of lacy women’s garters with a note “Thanks for a **GLEE** ful night! 😉 Love, Gypsy Rose” (this one)_ 4. A dried, dessicated “Bigfoot” foot. Or a wookie foot. It’s huge, hairy and has toes. 5. A blob of what looks like Silly Putty…but clearly is Flubber (the Fred MacMurray kind, not the Robin Williams kind) 6. A chunk of Red Kryptonite (note that without a Kryptonian present, I’m unable to determine what random effect it will have on them. But the effect will only last 24 hours.) 7. 2 “bobble-head” statues: one of Jerry Lewis and one of Carrottop. 8. A CD–“The Partridge Family Sings The Archie’s Greatest Hits!” 9. A small fishbowl–with no fish…but a tiny Aquaman astride a seahorse struggles to escape! 10. A stale jelly-donut with a bite taken out of it. When I try to determine what flavor jelly, it opens it’s eyes and glares balefully at me! 11. The issue of Penthouse with the nekkid pictures of Vanessa Williams. (For shame, **Glee**! For _shame_!) Fenris ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/224 "2003-12-26T19:18:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by glee \* > \*\*Christmas comes but once a year (obviously needs some Viagra! :eek: ) > > I would be **very** careful about using such quotes just before Xmas - you could be visited by 3 spirits (which would be in the **spirit** of the thread! :smack: ) \*\* Ah forget about it, I’m only miffed ‘cause I ain’t gettin’ any flirtin’. I never mix my drinks more than is strictly necessary, btw. ---
**Author:** ![NightRabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbce88/32.png) [@NightRabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NightRabbit)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/225 "2003-12-26T20:26:39Z")
1. Empty can of vanilla coke 2. Large coffee-table book of famous bridges 3. A pallid bust of Pallas 4. A globe 5. Three Musketeers candy bar 6. Small potted plant 7. Aerosol can of pesticide 8. Stuffed santa doll 9. Kitchen sponge (this one) 10. Tissue box 11. Magnet shaped like a star 12. Box of computer diskettes No psychic ability here (unless I’m right… whoa) ---
**Author:** ![NightRabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbce88/32.png) [@NightRabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NightRabbit)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/226 "2003-12-26T20:27:40Z")
whoops! well, I claim that the 12th item is in the room somewhere! How’s that for psychic? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/227 "2003-12-26T21:47:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IWLN \* > Uh…what? Did you just say something? Although I employed no psychic powers to deduce **Jess’s** gender, I believe my intuitive powers to be reliable here. I am glad you are a faithful flirt.Sylvia Brown, get ready for some stiff competition, because I know what this man’s thinking!!!:o > > **The Great Unwashed** , I’m sorry to succumb to the irrestistable urge to flirt again. I know it offends your scientific sensibilities. I am alas, a weak woman. But **glee** is just so darn cute and uh…it’s hard to know what else to do when you’re waiting for someone to Astraly Project. There is no previous scientific protocol for “AP watching” that I know of. I considered a rousing game of cards, but it just doesn’t have the same lure. IWLN, It is hard enough to concentrate and not let anything slip without your relentless double entendres and flirting\*. Yes, it must have seemed amusing to use the phrases ‘I know what this man’s thinking’ and ‘stiff’ in the same sentence. But how did you know? And describing yourself as a ‘weak’ woman is a real come-on to an English chap. If you should also happen to be ‘hot’, then you would perfectly resemble my favourite cup of tea. 🆒 Finally I think you must make your intentions\*\* clear. Am I cute like … a brother :smack: , or like … a friend 😃 ? \*please do not take this as a request to stop! \*\* it’s just like a romance novel ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/228 "2003-12-27T03:37:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fenris \* > \*\*1) The Ark of the Covenant. (not a replica…the real thing). It’s pretty big and takes up a lot of the desk. > 2) The egg of the phoenix. > 3) Two books by L. Frank Baum from a parallel universe (“The Silver Sorceress of Oz” and “Queen Zixi in Oz”) > _4) A pair of lacy women’s garters with a note “Thanks for a **GLEE** ful night! 😉 Love, Gypsy Rose” (this one)_ > 5) A dried, dessicated “Bigfoot” foot. Or a wookie foot. It’s huge, hairy and has toes. > 6) A blob of what looks like Silly Putty…but clearly is Flubber (the Fred MacMurray kind, not the Robin Williams kind) > 7) A chunk of Red Kryptonite (note that without a Kryptonian present, I’m unable to determine what random effect it will have on them. But the effect will only last 24 hours.) > 8) 2 “bobble-head” statues: one of Jerry Lewis and one of Carrottop. > 9) A CD–“The Partridge Family Sings The Archie’s Greatest Hits!” > 10) A small fishbowl–with no fish…but a tiny Aquaman astride a seahorse struggles to escape! > 11) A stale jelly-donut with a bite taken out of it. When I try to determine what flavor jelly, it opens it’s eyes and glares balefully at me! > 12) The issue of Penthouse with the nekkid pictures of Vanessa Williams. (For shame, **Glee**! For _shame_!) > > Fenris \*\* Dude, that’s **my** desk you’ve been remote viewing! ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/229 "2003-12-27T13:17:38Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by glee \* > It is hard enough to concentrate and not let anything slip without your relentless double entendres and flirting_. I’ve come to the conclusion that English men do it better. Oh, I mean they are more skilled. I mean at flirting and double entendres! > [@](#): > > Yes, it must have seemed amusing to use the phrases ‘I know what this man’s thinking’ and ‘stiff’ in the same sentence. But how did you know? Remember, I’m better than Sylvia Brown. Although I admit it took me ten minutes to type these two coherent sentences. My mind kept stopping to look at the pictures.:o > [@](#): > > And describing yourself as a ‘weak’ woman is a real come-on to an English chap. If you should also happen to be ‘hot’, then you would perfectly resemble my favourite cup of tea. 🆒 Uh, still can’t form sentences well. Is it warm in here or is it just me? > [@](#): > > Finally I think you must make your intentions\*\* clear. Am I cute like … a brother :smack: , or like … a friend 😃 ? Hey!! I don’t know how they do things in England, but in America, we don’t flirt with our brothers. That brought one perfectly delicious fantasy to a screeching halt. You’re going to have to make that one up to me. And while I am scolding you, who is this Gypsy Rose wench and why do people keep seeing her garters on your desk? I know what we have can never be more than a “thread”, but must I hear about your other dalliances? > [@](#): > > \*please do not take this as a request to stop! As if I could my ‘hot English Leather’.;)(note to mods: just trying to keep relations good between the U.S and England.) ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/230 "2003-12-27T14:04:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NightRabbit \* > > 1. Empty can of vanilla coke > 2. Large coffee-table book of famous bridges > 3. A pallid bust of Pallas > 4. A globe > 5. Three Musketeers candy bar > 6. Small potted plant > 7. Aerosol can of pesticide > 8. Stuffed santa doll > 9. Kitchen sponge (this one) > 10. Tissue box > 11. Magnet shaped like a star > 12. Box of computer diskettes > > No psychic ability here (unless I’m right… whoa) Thank you for contributing! ---
**Author:** ![SkeptiJess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@SkeptiJess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkeptiJess)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/231 "2003-12-27T18:49:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cityboy916 \* > \*\*If it was that easy, the test would be finished by now. 🙂 I have to wonder what would have gone through your mind had you started to float out. Clearing the mind alone in silence is one thing, but keeping it clear while you feel like you’re flying away is quite another, and that’s what I’ve been having difficulty with. \*\* I can imagine. Another thing I noticed in my little experiment with astral projection was something I’ve noticed before when someone has tried to hypnotise me – in all fairness, I must admit that my natural skepticism _does_ intrude. Throughout any attempts to clear my mind, my inner-Skeptic (sometimes known as my inner-smartass) keeps poking her head in and whispering, “Yeah, _this_ is gonna work…” I freely admit that it’s difficult (possibly even impossible) for me to be completely non-judgmental about the paranormal. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/232 "2003-12-27T23:50:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IWLN \* > I’ve come to the conclusion that English men do it better. Oh, I mean they are more skilled. I mean at flirting and double entendres! And other things too\*. 😃 \*like speaking in an English accent, and taking ages to chat up women > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IWLN \* > Is it warm in here or is it just me? Still the cup of tea analogy, huh? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IWLN \* > Hey!! I don’t know how they do things in England, but in America, we don’t flirt with our brothers. That brought one perfectly delicious fantasy to a screeching halt. You’re going to have to make that one up to me. And while I am scolding you, who is this Gypsy Rose wench and why do people keep seeing her garters on your desk? We don’t flirt with our sisters either. :eek: I meant that when a girl says ‘I like you as if you were my brother’, it’s a dampener on any romantic aspirations a chap may have. Was your ‘perfectly delicious fantasy brought to a screeching halt’ anything to do with a train entering a tunnel? :o > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IWLN \* > I know what we have can never be more than a “thread”, but must I hear about your other dalliances? As if I could my ‘hot English Leather’. Hot English Leather? Is this a reference to a Wellington boot left in front of a roaring log fire? ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/233 "2003-12-27T23:53:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jess \* > I freely admit that it’s difficult (possibly even impossible) for me to be completely non-judgmental about the paranormal. Don’t trust your feelings on matters of fact, trust the evidence! ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2003, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/234 "2003-12-28T18:11:03Z")
I notice that we’re up to page six now, and unless I’ve missed it, the actual test itself hasn’t happened, has it? I could have taken a Greyhound bus over there and _looked_ at the items, stopped over at my sister’s place in Maryland for Christmas, taken in the entire Ring cycle, and made it back home in Portland faster than this supposedly instantanious display of astral projection has taken. ---
**Author:** ![Gadfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gadfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gadfly)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2003, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/235 "2003-12-28T18:43:44Z")
Exactly. Just get on with it, folks. ---
**Author:** ![Quint\_Essence](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/54ee81/32.png) [@Quint\_Essence](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quint_Essence)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2003, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/236 "2003-12-29T00:39:23Z")
1.mickey mouse figurine 2.silver pen with a heart on the end of the pocket clip. 3.something with feathers 4.black keyboard 5.bottle of pain reliever…starts with E 6.Glass ball type paperweight. something green in the middle 7.magnifying jeweler type desk lamp 1. thats all i got… ---
**Author:** ![umop\_ap\_sdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/dbc845/32.png) [@umop\_ap\_sdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/umop_ap_sdn)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2003, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/237 "2003-12-29T07:26:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Czarcasm \* > \*\*I notice that we’re up to page six now, and unless I’ve missed it, the actual test itself hasn’t happened, has it? I could have taken a Greyhound bus over there and _looked_ at the items, stopped over at my sister’s place in Maryland for Christmas, taken in the entire Ring cycle, and made it back home in Portland faster than this supposedly instantanious display of astral projection has taken. \*\* True, and I regret that it has taken this long. To be fair, it was not my intention to imply that I would instantaneously astral project to **glee** ’s desk. My exact words, in the other thread (linked in the OP) were: > [@](#): > > I will devote as much energy as possible into the matter. I’ve been wanting to develop this ability anyway, why not get serious about it? I can go observe someplace I have never been, that you could verify what I see is really there. Where should I go look? Your front door, perhaps, or inside your refrigerator? Maybe the downtown section of your town or city? I also said that it might take a while, so the agreement (unless I missed something) was that there would be no time limit. Of course nothing’s stopping me from posting wild guesses, but in the interest of serious research I want to be sure that my post is based on a real projection. You’re right in that 25 days is an awful lot for something instantaneous, but neither **glee** nor I expected it to be instantaneous anyway. Please know that I am sensitive to everybody’s concerns here and will make more effort to achieve a result as quickly as possible. ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2003, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/238 "2003-12-29T07:54:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Czarcasm \* > \*\*I notice that we’re up to page six now, and unless I’ve missed it, the actual test itself hasn’t happened, has it? I could have taken a Greyhound bus over there and _looked_ at the items, stopped over at my sister’s place in Maryland for Christmas, taken in the entire Ring cycle, and made it back home in Portland faster than this supposedly instantanious display of astral projection has taken. \*\* Greyhound has a bus from Portland to England now? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2003, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/239 "2003-12-29T10:33:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IWLN \* > \*\*Greyhound has a bus from Portland to England now? :eek: \*\* Oh…You mean the other Portland. Blondes aren’t known for their high level of acuity when it comes to geography.:smack: ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696/240 "2003-12-29T16:13:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Czarcasm \* > I notice that we’re up to page six now, and unless I’ve missed it, the actual test itself hasn’t happened, has it? I could have taken a Greyhound bus over there and _looked_ at the items, stopped over at my sister’s place in Maryland for Christmas, taken in the entire Ring cycle, and made it back home in Portland faster than this supposedly instantanious display of astral projection has taken. As Cityboy did say, he was going to try to develop his ability, and asked for time to do so. Once he achieves that, the test should be pretty quick. (I’m prepared to leave the objects on my desk for up to a year!) As for your post above, I do live in the UK, so were you going to levitate a Greyhound bus across the Atlantic?! That would be something to see… 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/an-sdmb-test-of-astral-projection/216696.md?page=13)