# Anal swabs more effective in detecting COVID, says Chinese scientist **URL:** \ **Category:** The Quarantine Zone\ **Tags:** covid-quarantine\ **Created:** [January 27, 2021, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641 "2021-01-27T20:39:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2021, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/1 "2021-01-27T20:39:27Z")
Somebody check this guys search history. > **[COVID Anal Swabs for Beijing Residents More Accurate, Says Chinese Expert](https://www.newsweek.com/covid-anal-swabs-beijing-residents-more-accurate-says-chinese-expert-1564381)** > > Hundreds of thousands living in a key Beijing district have undergone antibody tests, as well as throat, nasal and anal swabs as the Chinese capital attempts to halt its second wave. We are so screwed now. On the other hand maybe the prospect of Government mandated anal probing might get the anti maskers, vaccine deniers and assorted Covidiots to finally see sense ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2021, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/2 "2021-01-27T20:45:21Z")
Answer #1: At many testing sites, cars are bumper to bumper and lines are 00’s of cars long. Do they all need to _back_ in now ?? Answer #2: The ghost of Allen Funt is, somewhere, laughing hysterically right now. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2021, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/3 "2021-01-27T21:32:22Z")
So THAT’s what all those aliens were probing for! ---
**Author:** ![Bootb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@Bootb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bootb)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/4 "2021-01-28T00:38:48Z")
It’s been known for months that testing wastewater is one way of detecting virus levels in a population. So this news is not all that surprising. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/5 "2021-01-28T00:41:23Z")
Came up in the “Trump has COVID” last fall: > [@Trump has COVID!](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/trump-has-covid/922022/798): > > New medical study indicates that sewage may be a transmission vector for COVID. To test the hypothesis, the researchers took rectal swabs of individuals at an outbreak in China: “Their throat swabs taken on April 13 tested positive for the Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome virus-2 (SARS-CoV-2) by real-time reverse transcriptase–polymerase chain reaction (RT-PCR). Subsequently, they were isolated for treatment. Their rectal swabs obtained on April 14 also tested positive.” “Now Mr President,… ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/6 "2021-01-28T03:41:14Z")
Polio is transmitted that way; nothing about COVID would surprise me at all. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/7 "2021-01-28T03:49:18Z")
So mask, gloves, and diaper now? ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/8 "2021-01-28T06:59:01Z")
At least travel will improve, airports already anally probe most of their customers. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/9 "2021-01-28T12:38:59Z")
I hate to admit this, but I’m less anxious about the thought of my bum getting a Q-tip than I am about my brain getting one. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/10 "2021-01-28T12:55:12Z")
You mean to say that my human centipede was not entirely sanitary? ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/11 "2021-01-28T12:59:05Z")
“In other news, many drive-through testing stations are installing express lanes for riders of recumbent bicycles.” ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/12 "2021-01-28T13:18:04Z")
And some of you thought this old toy would never see resurgent demand again … [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/gzsDvK8baPo/hqdefault.jpg "Kenner Sit 'N' Spin Toy Commercial (1977)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzsDvK8baPo) ---
**Author:** ![Toxylon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f05b48/32.png) [@Toxylon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toxylon)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2021, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/13 "2021-01-28T13:46:54Z")
> [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](#): > > I hate to admit this, but I’m less anxious about the thought of my bum getting a Q-tip than I am about my brain getting one. Agreed. I do not especially fancy the feeling of something poking behind my eyeball, whereas a 5 mm diameter, soft-tipped member would slip inside the brown starfish without problems. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2021, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/14 "2021-01-29T03:48:31Z")
> [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](#): > > I hate to admit this, but I’m less anxious about the thought of my bum getting a Q-tip than I am about my brain getting one. If I could do a self-swab, I don’t think I’d protest using this method either. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2021, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/15 "2021-01-29T17:14:56Z")
> [@DavidNRockies](#): > > Answer #1: At many testing sites, cars are bumper to bumper and lines are 00’s of cars long. > > Do they all need to _back_ in now ?? > > Answer #2: The ghost of Allen Funt is, somewhere, laughing hysterically right now And they told me I was wasting my youth mooning people out of car windows! ---
**Author:** ![Guy\_Incognito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guy_incognito/32/3920_2.png) [@Guy\_Incognito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guy_Incognito)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2021, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/16 "2021-01-29T19:36:35Z")
Hope they don’t suggest doing the swabbing like my previous COVID tests where they tested in the nostrils and the back of the throat. Above all, keep a solid grip on the swab so it doesn’t get “pulled in” accidentally… ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2021, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/17 "2021-01-29T19:39:52Z")
Braggart. ---
**Author:** ![Guy\_Incognito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guy_incognito/32/3920_2.png) [@Guy\_Incognito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guy_Incognito)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2021, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/18 "2021-01-29T19:46:22Z")
I’m imagining a nightmare scenario where the testing sites will have special “swab retrieval tongs” for just such an emergency. ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2021, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/19 "2021-01-29T19:54:48Z")
Highly trained greasy ferrets? ---
**Author:** ![Guy\_Incognito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guy_incognito/32/3920_2.png) [@Guy\_Incognito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guy_Incognito)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2021, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641/20 "2021-01-29T19:57:11Z")
I wouldn’t go that far. I guess if you just wait it out you would eventually end up producing the world’s most disturbing “corn dog”. (Man, I’ve derailed this thread in kind of a gross way. May God have mercy on my soul…) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anal-swabs-more-effective-in-detecting-covid-says-chinese-scientist/931641.md?page=2)