# And a bitchy New Year - January 2012 minirants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 1, 2012, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003 "2012-01-01T02:05:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/1 "2012-01-01T02:05:02Z")
It’s 3am and I’m awake. Why am I awake? Is it because I was up at midnight to welcome the new year? No, it’s because some guys who couldn’t hit a note with a hammer were singing outside. Seriously, dudes, celebrate all you want but let those of us who just had the flu and who have very little interest in seeing midnight sleep beyond 2:22, ok? Even if it’s kind of a cute hour. :o\<-- sleepy but can’t get back to sleep smiley ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/2 "2012-01-01T02:31:23Z")
It’s not fucking 2012 yet you stupid bastard! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/3 "2012-01-01T02:41:00Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > It’s not fucking 2012 yet you stupid bastard! > > 😉 It is in Spain! ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/4 "2012-01-01T02:46:33Z")
Spain doesn’t actually exist. It’s a myth. Scary boogey man stories involving some rat bastard named Christopher Colombus, Francisco Franco and a waiter named Manuel. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/5 "2012-01-01T02:47:37Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Spain doesn’t actually exist. It’s a myth. Scary boogey man stories involving some rat bastard named Christopher Colombus, Francisco Franco and a waiter named Manuel. Started celebrating early, eh? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/6 "2012-01-01T02:51:18Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > It is in Spain! And in Scotland 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/7 "2012-01-01T04:08:22Z")
Did you steal my paper towels, you fucking firebug? ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/8 "2012-01-01T04:18:12Z")
OK, I’ll jump in: I thought we were through with those stupid glasses once we got through with the years with two zeroes. Just saw a shot from Times Square with masses of the damn things…the manufacturer just cut a big circle in the middle of the one. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/9 "2012-01-01T04:27:54Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Spain doesn’t actually exist. It’s a myth. You’re thinking of North Dakota. Have you ever actually _met_ anyone from North Dakota? My living room looks like Chewbacca mated with Spiderman and spawned a Duggar-sized brood of action figures, thanks to my in-laws bringing my husband’s entire childhood collection of Star Wars, superheroes and Transformer action figures. I swear to God, they’re multiplying. Every time I think we have them all put away, I step on fucking R2D2. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/10 "2012-01-01T04:38:44Z")
> [@Elza\_B](#): > > You’re thinking of North Dakota. Have you ever actually _met_ anyone from North Dakota? Yes, and I’ve been there. It’s kinda like South Dakota, but less. Well, except for the whole shale oil thing. ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/11 "2012-01-01T04:54:58Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Yes, and I’ve been there. It’s kinda like South Dakota, but less. > > Well, except for the whole shale oil thing. Well, shit. Guess I need to find the North Dakota piece of my kid’s floor puzzle of the US. I thought it was an urban legend, like forwarding the email from Steve Jobs to 10 people to get a free iPod. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/12 "2012-01-01T05:02:39Z")
First post of 2012. Happy New Year. Go to hell if you don’t like it. ---
**Author:** ![LavenderBlue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e95f7d/32.png) [@LavenderBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LavenderBlue)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/13 "2012-01-01T05:07:25Z")
> [@Elza\_B](#): > > You’re thinking of North Dakota. Have you ever actually _met_ anyone from North Dakota? I met someone from Delaware once. I stared at her like she was unicorn or some other mythical creature. ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/14 "2012-01-01T05:12:14Z")
> [@LavenderBlue](#): > > I met someone from Delaware once. I stared at her like she was unicorn or some other mythical creature. I have my doubts about Delaware, too. I’m pretty sure they’re just a government conspiracy. I think it’s time to lay off watching episodes of Decoded. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/15 "2012-01-01T05:23:47Z")
It might be a Happy New Year if we make it through the night without catching a stray bullet. Motherfuckers in and around my neighborhood have been shooting automatic weapons and other guns since about 10:00. I will never understand the thought process behind that shit. Do these idiots not understand that all those bullets have to go somewhere? It could be my grandma in me, but I keep worrying one’s going to come through a window or a wall…or my ceiling. Not to mention all the other houses around here with families and little kids. Ahh, New Year’s Eve, drunken idiot amateur hour… ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/16 "2012-01-01T05:40:15Z")
Hey, I might actually make it to midnight for the first time in about five or six years! Twenty minutes to go. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/17 "2012-01-01T05:44:16Z")
> [@Indygrrl](#): > > It might be a Happy New Year if we make it through the night without catching a stray bullet. Motherfuckers in and around my neighborhood have been shooting automatic weapons and other guns since about 10:00. I will never understand the thought process behind that shit. Do these idiots not understand that all those bullets have to go somewhere? It could be my grandma in me, but I keep worrying one’s going to come through a window or a wall…or my ceiling. Not to mention all the other houses around here with families and little kids. > > Ahh, New Year’s Eve, drunken idiot amateur hour… We used to have that problem when there still workers living in the farm barracks behind us. Never ended up with a bullet over here, but I did bring the dogs inside for night. My bitch for the coming new year is it appears I will need surgery on a finger on my left hand and am currently wearing a brace. Making life a giant pain in the ass. (Blows horn in **Chimera’s** ear to keep him awake) ---
**Author:** ![Lare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/53a042/32.png) [@Lare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lare)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/18 "2012-01-01T06:01:11Z")
Might I humbly suggest that you move your finger out of there then? Staying inside, away from the bullets. Although now that they sell fireworks (that are illegal to use in my city) there are considerably more instances of not knowing if that loud bang is worth worrying about. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/19 "2012-01-01T06:02:25Z")
> [@Lare](#): > > Might I humbly suggest that you move your finger out of there then? Ha ha ha Pbtbtbtbtbtbtbtbt!!! ---
**Author:** ![Lare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/53a042/32.png) [@Lare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lare)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003/20 "2012-01-01T06:04:06Z")
(raises a glass in \*\*curlcoat’s \*\*general direction) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-a-bitchy-new-year-january-2012-minirants/608003.md?page=2)