# And I thought my in-laws were crazy **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 25, 2011, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923 "2011-03-25T03:17:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![murphy05](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@murphy05](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/murphy05)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/1 "2011-03-25T03:17:36Z")
[http://www.emailsfromyourinlaws.com/](http://www.emailsfromyourinlaws.com/) :eek: On the right, they have a best post list, which has some pretty hilarious reads. ---
**Author:** ![PeskiPiksi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e495f1/32.png) [@PeskiPiksi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PeskiPiksi)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/2 "2011-03-25T03:34:35Z")
Wow, I love the one from the MIL listing the FIL’s “food preferences” when invited over for dinner: > [@](#): > > Meat- absolutely no chicken, prefers meat that is moist with an even texture > Vegetables- no asparagus, mushrooms, brussel sprouts, or squash of any kind, no butter or seasoning on vegetables. > Fruit- only likes for breakfast or snack > Sauces/ condiments- no white! A good rule of thumb is that if the recipe sounds like it may be creamy, forget about it! So no mayo, ranch, alfredo, etc. And no ketchup (the site of it alone repulses him). No salad dressing. No peanut butter. > Dairy- white rule applies here too. Does not like butter (even on his bread) or milk or processed cheese in any form. > Starches- No whole grain pasta or brown rice. > Seasonings- Keep the salt low and avoid pepper. He is pretty flexible here as long as it is lightly seasoned and not on his vegetables (they have a tendency to soak up too much flavoring) > Sweets- only likes apple pie and chocolate ice cream (but not together of course). Occasionally will eat another fruit based pie if it is extremely good. > Snacks- no chips, dips, white or orange things > Nothing exotic in general. Who \*does \*that? ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/3 "2011-03-25T03:43:01Z")
> [@PeskiPiksi](#): > > Wow, I love the one from the MIL listing the FIL’s “food preferences” when invited over for dinner: > > Who \*does \*that? Doesn’t leave much, does it? ---
**Author:** ![Hakuna\_Matata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Hakuna\_Matata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hakuna_Matata)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/4 "2011-03-25T03:45:13Z")
That site is all kinds of awesome! Thanks for the link. Off to get some hand sanitizer. I liked this one: SIL and Daughter, Have you heard about this thing called sexting? It’s all over the news. The man and the woman write each other perverted little messages using there phone and they may or may not masterbate to them. Definitely not a Catholic thing to do. With all of this funny business going on all of the time without even saying a word you never know if the person in line ahead of you at the Ralphs is having sexual relations while you are just trying to buy some Tylenol for your baby with fever.Just something to think about. More of a reason to keep that hand sanitizer handy if you ask me. MIL ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/5 "2011-03-25T03:57:45Z")
:: reads some of site :: :: head explodes :: ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/6 "2011-03-25T04:09:57Z")
Holy shit. I had to read the whole site. And, :eek: . Thank Og the internet wasn’t around back when I had in-laws. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/7 "2011-03-25T06:12:36Z")
> [@PeskiPiksi](#): > > Wow, I love the one from the MIL listing the FIL’s “food preferences” when invited over for dinner: > > Who \*does \*that? My future FIL. I once served shrimp with tails on and he didn’t know how to eat them. :smack: She is an ovo/lacto vegatarian who loves grains and starches. He’s all about low carbs. Cooking for them can be rather…ummmm…would “challenging” be a good word? Just finding a resteraunt can take all afternoon. Thankfully, my sweet baboo has spent enough time eating from chow halls that he thinks that anything home cooked is good. Plus, if I botch it up, all I have to do is serve it naked 😃 ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/8 "2011-03-25T07:20:23Z")
Better serve it naked when it’s good sometimes too, otherwise he’ll associate “bad food” with “nekkid girlie” ---
**Author:** ![surrounded\_by\_literalists](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8baadc/32.png) [@surrounded\_by\_literalists](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/surrounded_by_literalists)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/9 "2011-03-25T08:02:11Z")
The all white memorial day is probably one of my sisters; right down to the scheduled bathroom breaks and dessert schedule. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/10 "2011-03-25T09:25:01Z")
The first one from March 23 is pretty sad. So these kids are going to be cousins, and they’ll have a name in common. That could be something that brings them together. Instead, they’ll probably have little to do with each other, just because at least one mom is a control freak with anger issues, and who knows about the other one. ☹ ETA: And yeah, the Memorial Day one. I can hear it in Cartman’s voice. “Thank you, Stan; you may have pie, cake and ice cream.” ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/11 "2011-03-25T10:32:25Z")
This is just one reason why we kept rejecting the idea to get my FIL and MIL a computer as a group gift from their kids. _shudder_ (They can definitely afford their own, but if we gave them a gift of one we’d be expected more than otherwise to be unpaid tech support since it wasn’t their idea to get.) ---
**Author:** ![shantih](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f6c823/32.png) [@shantih](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shantih)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/12 "2011-03-25T15:00:55Z")
Oh my God, this is priceless: > [@](#): > > ##### & ###, > > It’s been almost 8 days since you have visited. I am sure you two have better things to do, but it would be nice to see you. You are the light in my life after all. I guess you are probably too busy though. When ### was 5 and wearing little sailor suits with knee highs I never imagined that one day I would have to beg for a visit. I thought I would mean more than that from all of these years giving everything I have with the football and the soccer and the music lessons. But I guess not. > > I never really expected anything in return. The only thing that makes me happy is my children. I have adjusted my expectations to not require much as far as that goes. Still, it would bring me so much joy to see you for a few hours, let’s say Sunday afternoon. You probably can’t though. Let me know either way. > MIL Can I get a mop in here? The passive-aggressive martyrdom spilled just way the hell all over the floor. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/13 "2011-03-25T15:16:56Z")
> [@surrounded\_by\_literalists](#): > > The all white memorial day is probably one of my sisters; right down to the scheduled bathroom breaks and dessert schedule. Plus it just screams, “I scheduled the food before the picture-taking in all-white clothing because I know I’ll get to bitch about one of you for years to come about ruining My Awesome Moment.” Oh, and the MIL who took the kids out of school early, and admitted she knew the parent would have said no if she’d asked first? I suspect she got taken off of the “people who may pick up my kids” list at the school, immediately. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/14 "2011-03-25T16:19:12Z")
OMG, this is the bestest website ever. Thank you! ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/15 "2011-03-25T17:16:43Z")
The next time I see my inlaws I am going to thank them for not being insane. The more I read of this website the more I just want to send my mother in law a check or a pony or something for not being a nut. ---
**Author:** ![BetsQ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@BetsQ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BetsQ)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/16 "2011-03-25T17:19:03Z")
Oh dear god. I may send my in-laws a nice note right now to thank them for being sane. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/17 "2011-03-25T17:29:50Z")
My favorite: > [@](#): > > #####, > I am going to come out and say it. I know you have pornography in your home. And I know you are a lesbian. I went in your bedroom to rock the baby to sleep. I turned on the TV and I saw that the disk in your player was lesbian pornography. > > I don’t know what you are trying to pull. It’s one thing to be a lesbian, it’s another to be a married lesbian. I am a christian lady, so I am trying my best not to say what I really think. My poor brother has no idea. He loves you the way men should love women. I can’t imagine how much this is going to hurt him. > > I have no option but to tell my brother about your lesbian ways. He will probably divorce you, but I will try to get him to chose church counseling. I am praying for your soul. > > SIL ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/18 "2011-03-25T17:32:21Z")
Some of these are…wow. I’m so glad I married an orphan. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/19 "2011-03-25T17:40:46Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > I’m so glad I married an orphan. That should be a testimonal for the site: “So crazy, it makes me glad I married an orphan!” ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2011, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923/20 "2011-03-25T17:41:28Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > My favorite: I have no words. That couple will no longer be able to look each other in the eye when the sister-in-law is present, for fear of breaking out into hysterical laughter. That is awesome. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-i-thought-my-in-laws-were-crazy/575923.md?page=2)