# And now Fenris... You will die **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 26, 2001, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862 "2001-07-26T16:12:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Kamandi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5daacb/32.png) [@Kamandi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamandi)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/61 "2001-07-27T19:36:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by seawitch \* > \*\*It wouldn’t hurt to have a nubile virgin… \*\* I read this as “It wouldn’t hurt to nibble a virgin…” I gotta start reading more carefully. [sub]Right after a cold shower… ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/62 "2001-07-27T19:37:00Z")
I’ll bring the beer. ---
**Author:** ![Whammo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8dc957/32.png) [@Whammo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whammo)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/63 "2001-07-27T20:09:56Z")
_Hands out luke-warm cans of Natural Ice_ He will be missed… _sniff_ ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/64 "2001-07-27T20:10:42Z")
O.K: I just cast a resurrection spell and rolled my handy dandy spell die and viola! Fenris is brought back to life! But for some reason he now looks like Pierce Brosnan ;). BTW: since I’m the defender of all creatures cute and furry, I rescued all the groundhogs and their now living happy fulfiling lives. ---
**Author:** ![minty\_green](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@minty\_green](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minty_green)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/65 "2001-07-27T21:35:38Z")
i.e., digging up **Scylla** ’s fields. ---
**Author:** ![seawitch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@seawitch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seawitch)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/66 "2001-07-27T21:57:42Z")
Oh, fine, bring him back the easy way. I still want a nubile virgin. C’mon, the weekend is almost here, the board will be down… a girl has to have a hobby. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/67 "2001-07-27T22:07:31Z")
I’ll see what I can do. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![seawitch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@seawitch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seawitch)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/68 "2001-07-27T22:39:55Z")
**Persephone** - Oh, all right. You do the circle. I’ll take the East and warden for you. ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/69 "2001-07-27T22:46:37Z")
I’d volunteer for the part, but nubile as I might be, I’m disqualified as a virgin. ☹ I’ll try to get you those clippings, though. You don’t mind if I get you hair, as opposed to toenails, do you? ---
**Author:** ![Elenfair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cc9497/32.png) [@Elenfair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elenfair)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2001, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/70 "2001-07-27T22:48:28Z")
Scylla, kitten, pet… Now I know why I _adore_ you, oh supreme leader. Let it be known, the power of the Happy Fun Squad grows every day. In fact, we’ve converted a number of sad young men into groveling minions. Now… about that trip to the imperial palace… _snaps fingers_ Odieman, my clothes, please. _snaps fingers again_ Turbo Dog, fetch the car. We’re paying Emperor Scylla a visit. Elly ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/71 "2001-07-28T00:32:02Z")
Okay, the circle is cast, the energy is raised, yadda yadda yadda blah blah blah. Here goes… Gimme an F! Gimme an E! Gimme an N! Gimme an R! Gimme an I! Gimme an S! Fenris! Fenris! He’s our dead man! If he can’t resurrect, no one can! BOOMshakalakalakaBOOMshakalakalakaBOOM! :::crossing fingers & hoping that works…::: [sub]well, what did you expect from a self-taught solitary?[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/72 "2001-07-28T01:07:41Z")
Ahhhhh, I’ve spent the day away, commiting evil deeds (took my daughter to Sesame Place in Philly,) and I return to find the cage submerged, and two of my questions unanswered. At last my revenge is complete. Fenris is defeated. In a few short hours the board will be down. This will activate my global currency thingymadoober, and the world will be mine! All too easy. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/73 "2001-07-28T01:25:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scylla \* > **Finally, the confluence of events has arrived and I have reached my ultimate power. I have surpassed the 4,000 post mark, and my Supreme Leader thread has reached Threadspotting.** (bolding mine) Excuse me your Proeminence, but if you have reach your **ultimate** power, doesn’t it mean that you can’t defeat **Fenris** , since you can’t be more powerful than what you are now ? ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/74 "2001-07-28T02:27:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kabbes \* > Actually **'punha** , you just explained the quadratic formula. You need to explain “the” quadratic equation itself. Really? That’s contrary to everything I’ve ever heard or been taught about the quadratic equation. And I roomed with a math major last year:) Do you happen to have a citation for that so I can explain this to Brendan and embarass him in front of all our friends? > [@](#): > > In plain English: the quadratic equation describes the effect of varying an input if the output **depends on at most terms of the second degree of the input.** I’m having trouble parsing this bolded part. Do you mean here: “if the output depends on, at most, the X^2 bit.”? Because otherwise I’m confused by your explanation. > [@](#): > > If that isn’t plain enough, how about saying that the quadratic equation describes mathematical situations equivalent to a ball in flight. That would be for all values of A less than 0. I’m having trouble coming up with a good example for values greater than 0. ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/75 "2001-07-28T02:42:40Z")
Dunno if this helps, but to memorize the formula for solving quadratic equations, I put it to the tune from “Have you Ever seen a Lassie?” and 16 years later I still remember it! Doh! Just raised the page views and posting count to share useless trivia about myself! Sorry, Fenris! ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/76 "2001-07-28T02:47:57Z")
Don’t know if anyone else has noticed, but, um, er, **Fenris** hasn’t posted **anywhere** since shortly after his last post in this thread, where he mentions the dire circumstances he’s in. Now, I’ve looked all over the place (in ATMB, in CCC, even in CSR), and haven’t found a trace of him. I’m ready to send out the search teams. **Feeeeeeeeeeeeenris** **Feeeeeeeeeeeeeenris** Nope, nothing. Dammit **Scylla** you bring him back \*\* NOW\*\* or I’ll , I’ll I’ll give those Amish kids your posting schedule ! ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/77 "2001-07-28T04:46:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ivorybill \* > \*\*Tune in next week… Same Fenris time, Same Fenris channel. > > 'Cept for you, **Fenris**. Couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy. \*\* [NarratorVoice] \*Could this be the end of \*\*Fenrisman[sup]\*_TM[/sup]? Has the diabolic Scylla put the **bite** on our hero? Can Scylla control the world’s currency markets? Can the **Amish** stop him? Will the incantations work? Could there still be a way out for **Fenrisman** [sup]TM[/sup]? Can groundhogs actually consume peanut butter_? To find out the answers to these, and other questions, tune in next week… [/NarratorVoice] ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2001, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/78 "2001-07-28T12:38:56Z")
"They asked each other countless riddles, such as who played the Cisco Kid and what was Krypton. In the end Dildo won the game. Stumped at last for a riddle to ask, he cried out, as his hand fell on his snub-nosed .38, “What have I got in my pocket?” – _Bored of the Rings_, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/79 "2001-07-29T03:35:15Z")
I know I should start this off with a quote, but, frankly, this puppy is loading so slowly that I don’t have the heart to go back to the previous page to get it. At any rate, Fenris, if you are still alive, I must quibble with your answer to #15. As I recall, there were “Nazgul Equivalents” in Bored of the Rings – the Pig Riders. They rode, well, PIGS! ---
**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2001, 9:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862/80 "2001-07-30T09:44:15Z")
Ah **'punha** - if you want to call it the quadratic equation then be my guest. Just don’t then say that ‘the quadratic equation solves the quadratic equation’! But personally I still say that the quadratic _equation_ is A + BX + CX[sup]2[/sup] = 0 whilst the quadratic _formula_, or _solution_ to the quadratic eqation is X = (-B +/- sqrt(B[sup]2[/sup] - 4AC)) / 2A You quoted the solution, not the equation itself. And yes, my lack of commas in the sentence you identified was a problem. You parsed it correctly. And the ball in flight bit was just an attempt to describe an algebraic expression in terms a layman would understand. Don’t like it? Feh. You do better 🙂 pan - a maths graduate, trumping your roommate who presumably doesn’t actually have his degree yet 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-fenris-you-will-die/73862.md?page=5)