# And Now for Something Completely Different: The Dead Parrot **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 3, 2013, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008 "2013-06-03T05:21:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/1 "2013-06-03T05:21:15Z")
Britain’s RAF pays out 2200 pounds (US$3300) in compensation for a parrot that dropped dead from the sound of a low-flying jet. Story [here](http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/parrot-owner-given-2200-after-1928036). Transcript of the parrot owner trying to receive compensation is [here](http://www.davidpbrown.co.uk/jokes/monty-python-parrot.html). ---
**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/2 "2013-06-03T05:51:22Z")
Really, all the jokes one could possibly make about this have already been made. ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/3 "2013-06-03T06:03:34Z")
> [@](#): > > Its death in Ayrshire followed a similar incident where a low-flying plane caused a parrot to fall off its perch and break both its legs. Military chiefs agreed to cover vet bills – including two splints. Maybe the owner shouldn’t have nailed it to the perch. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/4 "2013-06-03T06:08:46Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > Really, all the jokes one could possibly make about this have already been made. No they haven’t. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/5 "2013-06-03T06:33:25Z")
He’s not dead! He’s stunned! ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/6 "2013-06-03T07:27:00Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > No they haven’t. Arguments are next door. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/7 "2013-06-03T08:04:53Z")
DON’T GIVE ME THAT, YOU SNOTTY-FACED HEAP OF PARROT DROPPINGS!!x Note to Mods: [That was just a quote](http://www.montypython.net/scripts/argument.php) ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/8 "2013-06-03T11:37:11Z")
> [@Terminus\_Est](#): > > Maybe the owner shouldn’t have nailed it to the perch. For doing that, the owner should be slapped with the perch. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Greenjeans](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.greenjeans/32/551_2.png) [@Mr.Greenjeans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Greenjeans)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/9 "2013-06-03T11:50:38Z")
Can’t blame British Rail for that. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/10 "2013-06-03T12:06:02Z")
I like Python as much as anybody, but, jokes aside, it would suck to have a pet killed by somebody else’s loud noise. Somewhere in this story there’s room for a serious discussion of balancing the exigencies of national defense with quality of life. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/11 "2013-06-03T14:03:31Z")
> [@Sailboat](#): > > Somewhere in this story there’s room for a serious discussion of balancing the exigencies of national defense with quality of life. No, there isn’t. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/12 "2013-06-03T14:17:18Z")
‘E’s not pinin’! 'E’s passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E’s expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E’s a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn’t nailed 'im to the perch 'e’d be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E’s off the twig! 'E’s kicked the bucket, 'e’s shuffled off ‘is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!! ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/13 "2013-06-03T16:04:40Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > No, there isn’t. Yes there is! The noise could probably only have been worse if the poor parrot and his owner had lived near a late-night restaurant in Bangkok. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/14 "2013-06-03T16:21:22Z")
[Why, so it is. Here’s your money back.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTV3lQc4AmQ) ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Greenjeans](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.greenjeans/32/551_2.png) [@Mr.Greenjeans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Greenjeans)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2013, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/15 "2013-06-03T16:58:04Z")
If you want to get anything done in this country you’ve got to complain till you’re blue in the mouth. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2013, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-for-something-completely-different-the-dead-parrot/660008/16 "2013-06-05T14:21:05Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > ‘E’s not pinin’! 'E’s passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E’s expired and gone to meet 'is maker! > > 'E’s a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn’t nailed 'im to the perch 'e’d be pushing up the daisies! > 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E’s off the twig! > 'E’s kicked the bucket, 'e’s shuffled off ‘is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisibile!! > > THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!! Beautiful plumage!