# And now, the other side: Things that bug you about Star Wars. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 25, 2003, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442 "2003-05-25T19:36:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Achernar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e274bd/32.png) [@Achernar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achernar)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/101 "2003-05-27T02:50:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Parallax \* > Yeah - the databank on [StarWars.com](http://StarWars.com) for [Kessel](http://www.starwars.com/databank/location/kessel/bts.html) has three explanations and this is the one I like the best. =) That’s a pretty good explanation, and I’m glad to see that George Lucas agrees with me. 😃 But you’d think they could have proofread this better: > [@](#): > > Given that a parsec is a unit of measurement and not of time, it hardly seemed like a speed record. A parsec is a unit of measurement? Well duh. They should have said it’s a unit of distance. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/102 "2003-05-27T03:10:35Z")
in re: the Kessel / parsec discussion. Like I said at the start, they made a mistake. No amount of back pedalling _after the fact_ can fix it. But, it’s fun to see them try. * * * also, Luke should’ve 'used the Force" with Leia, if you know what I mean. Did you see her in the gold bikini?! Then, it would’ve been a major character developement to have to deal with all the questions of incest and stuff. The resulting child could’ve been an interesting force in this universe. Did you see her in the gold bikini?! ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/103 "2003-05-27T03:12:12Z")
Yes, dear, I saw. And you make far too much sense. I’m frightened. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/104 "2003-05-27T03:14:26Z")
btw, we know it’s after the fact because that site/cite said Lucas’ explanation appeared in the screenplay for _A New Hope_. Guess what? It wasn’t called _A New Hope_ in its initial release. That subtitle was added in a re-release just prior to _ESB_. I learned that on this very message board not too long ago. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/105 "2003-05-27T03:17:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by BuckleberryFerry \* > \*\*Yes, dear, I saw. And you make far too much sense. I’m frightened. \*\* Ya know? We need to create a “Crazy Boy” smiley just for me. It can only be used by me or in reference to me. WHAT?! ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/106 "2003-05-27T03:19:38Z")
I like the idea. But seriously, your concept of character development being brought up through the concept of incest makse sense–I always wondered why, when Luke tells her he’s her brother, Leia didn’t exclaim, “Ugh, my TONGUE was in your MOUTH!” ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/107 "2003-05-27T06:07:35Z")
Also, if the Storm troopers are clones of jengo Phet, why would Auggie Ben Doggie talk about (or imply) their “simple” minds being easy to control? It’s the hover car scene at the city limits (Ep IV), “These aren’t the droids you want.” “These aren’t the droids we want.” "Move along. " “Move along.” If Jengo could out wit a Jedi, like in the rain planet scene in _There Be Clones Here!_, then why were his clones such dolts? Was it the cloners manipulating the genes? Was that explained in the movie (Ep II) and I missed it? ---
**Author:** ![Achernar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e274bd/32.png) [@Achernar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achernar)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/108 "2003-05-27T06:20:40Z")
You’ve hit upon a much bigger question. Namely, why are the clone troopers so awesome and the storm troopers so lame? Clearly, it’s because George Lucas did not care at all about continuity when writing Episodes IV-VI, and completely disregarded the fact that these characters rock. Fortunately, he came to his senses by the time he wrote the prequels. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/109 "2003-05-27T10:57:20Z")
It’s going to be a bit of a list… - The virgin birth. Totally idiotic, wholly unnecessary. - Qui-Gon’s existence. Completely messed up the feel you get from Obi-Wan’s statements about Yoda and Anakin. - The midi-chlorians. 'Nuff said. - The awful, terrible, unfunny, ridiculous comic relief of episodes 1 and 2. - C3P0 and R2D2 being in the prequels. I loved the original three. They had a big influence on me in my childhood and probably still do. They were a big part of me growing up. I’m an unabashed _Star Wars_ fan. But now? I don’t think I’ll even go see episode 3 in the cinema. I just don’t care enough. ---
**Author:** ![Parallax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbce88/32.png) [@Parallax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Parallax)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/110 "2003-05-27T13:30:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Achernar \* > \*\*You’ve hit upon a much bigger question. Namely, why are the clone troopers so awesome and the storm troopers so lame? Clearly, it’s because George Lucas did not care at all about continuity when writing Episodes IV-VI, and completely disregarded the fact that these characters rock. Fortunately, he came to his senses by the time he wrote the prequels. \*\* Because all (or at least most) of the clone troopers were killed during the Clone War and have been replaced by regular soldiers recruited out of the general population? ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/111 "2003-05-27T14:32:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jsgoddess \* > **And Amidala meeting a little kid (a stupid little kid, may I add?) and then ten years later she meets him again and gets all drooly over him? She’s a grown woman! How many women in their 20s would even look twice at some punk kid they knew when he was 7? Ick. ICK!** I can’t speak for the ladies, but [Kirsten Dunst](http://us.imdb.com/Name?Dunst,+Kirsten) was 12 when she appeared in _Interview With The Vampire_. At the time, I was 21. Now she’s 21 and I’m 30. In the parallel universe where I’m not married, I would happily keep her as my love slave. ---
**Author:** ![Gumbercules](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gumbercules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gumbercules)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/112 "2003-05-27T14:58:12Z")
OK we’ve covered the amazing stormtrooper armor which resists everything except blasters and, um, Ewoks rocks. Here’s a few we missed so far: Why would they build the second death star with essentially the same weakness as the first one? And why didn’t R2D2 fly ever again? ---
**Author:** ![Parallax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbce88/32.png) [@Parallax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Parallax)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/113 "2003-05-27T15:18:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gumbercules \* > **Why would they build the second death star with essentially the same weakness as the first one?** The second death star was unfinished which is why the Rebel fighters were able to fly inside and destroy the reactor. I think that had it been finished there wouldn’t have been any external access points. Or you could say that the Emperor was arrogant and didn’t think the Rebels would get a chance. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gumbercules \* > \*\*And why didn’t R2D2 fly ever again? \*\* I assume you are talking about the jets in his legs that he uses to fly in AOTC? I don’t know exactly - but both R2D2 and C3PO had a number of owners between episodes III and IV so I assume that they underwent some modifications along the way. Certainly they had their memories wiped so who knows what else was done. Perhaps they were broken and expensive to replace? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![archmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@archmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/archmichael)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/114 "2003-05-27T15:57:25Z")
Looks like most of my gripes have been covered, but here’s some of the stuff you missed. Lucas is trapped in the Forties and Fifties. - The fighters dogfight like WWII fighters. - The starship in the opening sequence of AOTC sounds like a B-17 bomber. - The cars in AOTC look like 50’s hotrods - The Fifties diner that **Widdershins** brought up. What were they there for again? To find out about the Cloners, or to find out where Ritchie, Potsy & Ralph are going to be cruisin’ later. - The Harley chopper hoverbike that Anikan rides off into the sunset with. ---
**Author:** ![Gumbercules](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gumbercules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gumbercules)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/115 "2003-05-27T16:06:05Z")
Oh, yeah, I forgot one. Why is everybody too stupid to mount rear-firing cannons on their spacecraft? One thing that has always bugged me about the Millenium Falcon: After the death star escape, Luke and Han have to climb up and down ladders to reach the gun turrets. But they seem to be sitting in a horizontal orientation when they are firing. None of this matches the outside appearance of the MF. Something never seemed right sbout that scene… ---
**Author:** ![Short\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Short\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Short_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/116 "2003-05-27T16:12:55Z")
> [@](#): > > The second death star was unfinished which is why the Rebel fighters were able to fly inside and destroy the reactor. I think that had it been finished there wouldn’t have been any external access points. Wasn’t the whole “point” of the second death star that it _was_ finished and operational, but just _looked_ like it wasn’t? ---
**Author:** ![Parallax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbce88/32.png) [@Parallax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Parallax)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/117 "2003-05-27T16:23:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Short Guy \* > \*\*Wasn’t the whole “point” of the second death star that it _was_ finished and operational, but just _looked_ like it wasn’t? \*\* That was the point of the Emperor’s trap to get rid of the Rebels (he leaked the information) but I don’t think he would have left it that way. I suspect it would have been completed and used in the same manner as the original Death Star. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/118 "2003-05-27T18:17:55Z")
> [@](#): > > The reason making the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs is boast worthy is because there is a huge ass black hole near Kessel that forces average pilots to take a large detour around the area because of the gravitational disturbances. A hot shot pilot who has a very good ship with experience in the area (especially smugglers) can cut it closer to the black hole without getting sucked in, a sort of short cut. Shorter distance means less time. Blah blah blah blah blah. 😛 I know Lucas thinks he’s god almighty and will never ever ever admit he could screw anything up, but he did. He had no idea what he was talking about and assumed nobody else would either. This is frankly the smallest dialogue error he’s ever made anyway. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sock\_Munkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Sock\_Munkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sock_Munkey)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/119 "2003-05-27T18:20:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by archmichael \* > \*\*Looks like most of my gripes have been covered, but here’s some of the stuff you missed. > > Lucas is trapped in the Forties and Fifties. > > - The fighters dogfight like WWII fighters. > - The starship in the opening sequence of AOTC sounds like a B-17 bomber. > - The cars in AOTC look like 50’s hotrods > - The Fifties diner that **Widdershins** brought up. What were they there for again? To find out about the Cloners, or to find out where Ritchie, Potsy & Ralph are going to be cruisin’ later. > - The Harley chopper hoverbike that Anikan rides off into the sunset with. \*\* Seriously, if you had a sweet ride like a flying car or hoverbike wouldn’t you trick it out with chrome and stuff? Cars in the 50’s were styled like fighter jets with those tailfins and and lights that looked like a jet exhaust because that was the current trend. Is it odd that cars that really do fly would look the same way? ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442/120 "2003-05-27T18:54:54Z")
Okay, I’m coming into this late, and I’m not a dyed-in-the-wool fan, but here’s my list of things that bug me about _Star Wars:_ 1. Midichloreans. Barf, barf, barf. 2. Anakin and Amidala’s romance. I don’t mean her hopping in the sack with him, I mean the whole courtship/dating/whatever thing – it all felt so forced and artificial. I’m not a fan of romantic movies, but the entire “romance” subplot in AOTC felt like it was written and directed by someone who had never seen a romantic movie or read a romance novel. 3. The writing in general. Lucas can direct, but he sure can’t write. Lucas’ writing hit its peak with _A New Hope,_ and has been going downhill since (_Empire_ doesn’t count since he didn’t write it, natch). 4. The directing. Lucas does great cinematic scenes, but once you go from robots to people, it’s all just “run around, hit your lines, and let’s move on.” You could literally sleepwalk through your lines in a doped-out haze (as Carrie Fisher reportedly did during _Return of the Jedi_), and Lucas won’t care. 5. The Ewok/Endor fight. I don’t hate the Ewoks, but the Stormtroopers rolled over like a bunch of patsies. Bleagh. 6. Everything added in the “Special Edition” remakes. Okay, the bigger/badder/majestic overview of Mos Eisley was nice, but that was about it. 7. The “Special Edition” Death Star explosion. Hated it so much I’m listing it separately. 8. The blatant attempts by Lucas to squeeze more toys and merchandising gimcrackery in the movies. I can’t watch a _SW_ movie now without looking for the Hasbro tag attached to every character, scene, and vehicle. 9. C-3PO. Does he serve a purpose, other than to take up space? Okay, he translates for R2-D2, but that’s not enough of a reason to keep him around. …whew. I think that’s all of it… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-now-the-other-side-things-that-bug-you-about-star-wars/177442.md?page=7)