# And the most homoerotic movie ever made is... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 19, 2008, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571 "2008-08-19T17:30:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![DarRRva](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/53a042/32.png) [@DarRRva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarRRva)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/141 "2008-10-20T05:53:10Z")
There’s a weird New Zealand film called **Desperate Remedies,** and besides the actual lesbian plotline, there’s an exchange which goes on between a half naked and incredibly hot Kevin Smith may he rest in peace, and an almost as hot half naked Cliff Curtis. Even though they end up stabbing at each other later on, it looks a lot like they’ve been gettin’ it on hot and heavy before their mutual (female, who happens to be a muncher) love interest shows up. ---
**Author:** ![Euthanasiast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Euthanasiast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euthanasiast)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/142 "2008-10-20T08:55:58Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > You know what? You need to join the Marine Corps, and tell all your hot man buddies how homo they are. [Hyperbole](http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/hyperbole). [Humor](http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/humor). [You](http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/thin-skinned). ---
**Author:** ![Darkhold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@Darkhold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darkhold)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 9:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/143 "2008-10-20T09:37:49Z")
I can’t believe nobody has mentioned **Jeepers Creepers 2** (maybe nobody else has sat through that drek?). Not only is that movie really really gay but it’s done in a very creepy way. A frail boy is picked on by the big tough football player who then goes out lines up shirtless with several other muscular boys who then all pee together. The monster has a large fleshy fold on his face that is so a vagina who proceeds to point at a boy on the buss and licks the windows. By about halfway through I was bursting out laughing every time I caught another creepy gay vibe from the movie. Even my friend who is about as deep as a spoon quickly started catching the weird tone of the movie and was laughing with me. We just about died at the end of the movie where the director couldn’t resist but put one more muscular shirtless boy in the movie for no reason what-so-ever. Later I found out [this guy](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Victor_Salva) was the director. Imagine my lack of surprise. Disclaimer I understand that gay does not equal pedophile this guy just happens to be both ---
**Author:** ![Walker\_in\_Eternity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/46a35a/32.png) [@Walker\_in\_Eternity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walker_in_Eternity)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/144 "2008-10-20T10:39:14Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > Lord of the Rings trilogy. Spot on. All the crying and “I love you Mr Frodo were dead giveaways”, Sam only married Rosy as a cover. ---
**Author:** ![mr.jp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/48db29/32.png) [@mr.jp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mr.jp)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/145 "2008-10-20T11:22:09Z")
> [@Walker\_in\_Eternity](#): > > Spot on. All the crying and “I love you Mr Frodo were dead giveaways”, Sam only married Rosy as a cover. “Can you see the bottom?” 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/146 "2008-10-20T12:09:21Z")
> [@Darkhold](#): > > I can’t believe nobody has mentioned **Jeepers Creepers 2** (maybe nobody else has sat through that drek?). I sat through it (and drek it was) and now that you mention it there was a pretty homoerotic theme going through it. The hot boys in it did spend an inordinate amount of time with their shirts off. Not that I was complaining… ---
**Author:** ![Capt.Ridley\_s\_Shooting\_Party](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/cc9497/32.png) [@Capt.Ridley\_s\_Shooting\_Party](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt.Ridley_s_Shooting_Party)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/147 "2008-10-20T12:48:07Z")
> [@CaerieD](#): > > Aside from being a hilariously stupid movie, **Superbad** was also really, really gay. The relationship between the boys gave me a real **Y Tu Mama Tambien** vibe and it was almost a surprise they didn’t end up having some sort of experience together. I was tempted to buy the phallographic tie-in book afterwards. Wait, didn’t they end up sleeping together? Wasn’t that kind of implied at the end of the film? ---
**Author:** ![Risha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/5fc32e/32.png) [@Risha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Risha)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/148 "2008-10-20T14:16:16Z")
I can’t believe that I forgot to mention _The Lost Boys_, if only for the bathtub scene. I once read an entire Smallville slash fic based around the subtext of that film, so I know it wasn’t just me. ---
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/149 "2008-10-20T14:17:42Z")
> [@DarRRva](#): > > There’s a weird New Zealand film called **Desperate Remedies,** and besides the actual lesbian plotline, there’s an exchange which goes on between a half naked and incredibly hot Kevin Smith may he rest in peace, and an almost as hot half naked Cliff Curtis. Even though they end up stabbing at each other later on, it looks a lot like they’ve been gettin’ it on hot and heavy before their mutual (female, who happens to be a muncher) love interest shows up. I picked this up on VHS because of the _Xena_ connections–but was amazed by the movie. Totally over the top in every way. No DVD release, alas. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/150 "2008-10-20T14:34:08Z")
> [@Walker\_in\_Eternity](#): > > Spot on. All the crying and “I love you Mr Frodo were dead giveaways”, Sam only married Rosy as a cover. Bearing in mind that everything is second-place to _300_, count this as another vote for the LOTR trilogy. All those big strong men (and some tall willowy men) riding off into the mountains together away from the womenfolk. Too bad they left out the nekkid-hobbit-bath scene from early in the books. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/151 "2008-10-20T14:56:28Z")
> [@boyo jim](#): > > 120 plus replies and no one’s mentioned _shane_ yet? TAKE THAT BACK!!! (stupid vbulletin won’t let me yell when I need to.) ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/152 "2008-10-20T15:02:03Z")
> [@BMax](#): > > I still haven’t watched 300 because the trailers were gay enough to make me squirm. The _Road Warrior_ depicted a post-apocalyptic outback as one huge leather bar, but I came here to mention [_i]The Fellowship of the Ring._\* > > The loving friendships between Frodo & Sam, \*\*Pippin & Merry, Legolas & Gimli. \*\*Boromir got teh gay for Aragorn, as did Haldir later in the Two Towers. Hugo Weaving’s eyebrows twitching while he and Gandalf speak in private, Gandalf and Saroman split up in a huge spectacular fight, after which Saroman told his army of big sweaty muscular orcs: > > “You will taste _manflesh_!” (bolding mine) I don’t see it in that movie for anybody other than Sam & Frodo (and even then it’s just that Jackson was accidentally true to the books and captured a different culture). In the first movie, Legolas & Gimli can just barely stand each other. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/153 "2008-10-20T15:27:14Z")
How about **Ben Hur**? According to co-screenwriter Gore Vidal, Stephen Boyd and director William Wyler (as reported in the book and the movie **The Celluloid Closet** ), there didn’t appear to be sufficient motivation for Messala’s actions, especially his actions against Judah Ben-Hur’s family. Although there wasn’t any suggestion of it in Lew Wallace’s novel or the 1925 silent version, they decided that Messala had been in a homosexual relationship with Judag Ben-Hur before he departed for Rome, and was hoping to resume it upon his return. His being disappointed in this lead to his spiteful actions. According to TCC, you can see Messala’s expectations in his gaze at his reunion with Ben-Hur at the beginning. According to them, Heston wasn’t in on this, but played it straight. “Don’t tell Chuck”. That’s plausible, if true – it would explain why their characters experienced such a mismatch. Makes you wonder, when you re-watch the film after hearing this. > [@](#): > > The chat withGore Vidal has already become famous. He recalls how he was hired by directorWilliam Wyler to do rewrites on `Ben-Hur.'' One of the film's problems was thatthere was no plausible explanation for the hatred between the characters playedby Charlton Heston and Stephen Boyd. Vidal's suggestion: They were lovers whenthey were teenagers, but now Ben-Hur (Heston) denies that time, and Boyd isresentful. Wyler agreed that would provide the motivation for a key scene, butdecided to tell only Boyd, not Heston, who `wouldn’t be able to handle it.''The film shows the scene, which plays with an amusing subtext. [http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/19960426/REVIEWS/604260301/1023](http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/19960426/REVIEWS/604260301/1023) [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0052618/](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0052618/) [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0112651/](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0112651/) ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/154 "2008-10-20T16:08:43Z")
To me, THE 300 was just a terrible movie! Question: when did the greeks start wearing pants? Did they learn from the persians? ---
**Author:** ![Leiko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Leiko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leiko)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/155 "2008-10-20T16:32:54Z")
> [@pepperlandgirl](#): > > \ [-Ice Man. > > For that matter, **Tombstone** is pretty gay. > > **Point Break**. That movie was very obviously about the epic love between an FBI agent and a criminal. Even Keanu’s ostensible love interest was a girl who looked like a man (Lori Petty) and went buy a man’s name (Tyler). I think Mike Nelson put it best when he said “Not since the Jets and the Sharks minced down an alley way have such macho men been so utterly, utterly gay.” There’s no other way most of that movie makes sense if they’re not falling in love with each other—Keanu can’t shot Swayze because “he loves him so so much.” And in the end, he has to let Swayze die on his own terms…and once he’s found Swayze and let him go what does he do? Drop his badge! Of course he does. Law enforcement holds nothing more for him. > > **Shaun of the Dead** > Shaun: He’s not my boyfriend. > Ed (hands Shaun a beer): It might be a bit warm, the cooler’s off. > Shaun: Thanks babe. (wink) \ How can you mention Point Break and Shaun of the Dead right next to each other and not reach the logical conclusion of Hot Fuzz? I’d say that Nick Angel and Danny Butterman have way more homoerotic subtext than Shaun and Ed- although with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, you can pretty much expect homoerotic subtext whatever they do. But it’s especially prevalent in Hot Fuzz, since Nick was originally scripted with a female love interest, but she was in the way of the story, so they just gave most of her lines straight to Danny instead. ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/156 "2008-10-20T16:40:35Z")
Did they use that gag in _Shaun of the Dead_? I thought it was from _Spaced_. “He’s not my boyfriend. (picks up phone) Hey babe.” ---
**Author:** ![Mississippienne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d2c977/32.png) [@Mississippienne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mississippienne)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/157 "2008-10-20T21:34:23Z")
> [@ralph124c](#): > > To me, THE 300 was just a terrible movie! > Question: when did the greeks start wearing pants? Did they learn from the persians? When did they wear pants? All I saw were jockstrap things that even Till from Rammstein would be too modest to wear. Also, for all the talk of _300_, no one’s specifically mentioned the two big gay moments: 1. Astinos and Stelios (Buff Spartan #1 and Buff Spartan #2, in case you’re confused about anyone other than King “SPAAAARTA” Leonidas) flirting while stacking dead Persians. Only in _300_ would this seem romantic. 2. Xerxes basically offering to make Leonidas his queen. What gets me isn’t the over-the-top sparkly body paint and BDSM getup Rodrigo Santoro is sporting, but that when Xerxes puts his hands on Leonidas’ shoulders, Leonidas _doesn’t_ jerk away or snarl at him to stop touching him – but instead he sort of leans back into Xerxes’ hands, as though waiting for a backrub. Tragically, this dialogue was cut: XERXES: We will kill your men and rape your women! Oh, and… are you doing anything later? LEONIDAS: Your tent or mine? [QUOTE=levdrakon] Old version or new version? I haven’t seen either one, I don’t think. [/QUOTE] New version. The original was made in the mid-1970s sometime, probably before Tyrese was even a zygote, much less an actor. ---
**Author:** ![Leiko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Leiko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leiko)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/158 "2008-10-20T22:13:48Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Did they use that gag in _Shaun of the Dead_? I thought it was from _Spaced_. > > “He’s not my boyfriend. (picks up phone) Hey babe.” I’m pretty sure there was an answering the phone version in _Spaced_ and a drinks version in _Shaun of the Dead_. Well, I know for a fact about Shaun, since I watch that movie at least once a month. ---
**Author:** ![BMax](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bmax/32/4267_2.png) [@BMax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMax)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/159 "2008-10-20T22:27:20Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > (bolding mine) > > I don’t see it in that movie for anybody other than Sam & Frodo (and even then it’s just that Jackson was accidentally true to the books and captured a different culture). In the first movie, Legolas & Gimli can just barely stand each other. That’s right, Legolas and Gimli hate each other at first, because of ethnic rivalry. But through shared hardships and competing to kill the most orcs, they bond, and overcome their learned hatred for one another, and by the middle of the third movie, they’re sharing a horse! Doesn’t that pretty much spell it out for you? Legolas = Twink Gimli = Bear And they wrap their thighs around the same horsey at the same time! Holding tight to that bucking bronco, as they gallop across the plains on the steed given them by the horsemen of Rohan! They learned the hard way not to have sex with any from Gondor, lest they catch _Gondor-ea_. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571/160 "2008-10-20T22:48:50Z")
> [@BMax](#): > > That’s right, Legolas and Gimli hate each other at first, because of ethnic rivalry. But through shared hardships and competing to kill the most orcs, they bond, and overcome their learned hatred for one another, and by the middle of the third movie, they’re sharing a horse! Doesn’t that pretty much spell it out for you? > Legolas = Twink > Gimli = Bear > And they wrap their thighs around the same horsey at the same time! Holding tight to that bucking bronco, as they gallop across the plains on the steed given them by the horsemen of Rohan! > > They learned the hard way not to have sex with any from Gondor, lest they catch _Gondor-ea_. I said I didn’t see it for the FIRST movie. I agree that there’s Legolas-Gimli subtext in the other two, as they reconciled up in Lothlorien. And nobody has sex in Lothlorien, as everrone’s too busy pining for the unattainable Galadriel and frantically thinking of ways to earn their way into her bed. Well, everybody except for Celeborn, who’s already in her bed, and Arwen & Celebrian, as that would be ooky. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-most-homoerotic-movie-ever-made-is/460571.md?page=9)