# And the niggers will rise up against the porch monkeys **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 13, 2011, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103 "2011-12-13T23:34:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/41 "2011-12-14T14:17:32Z")
…in their SUVs. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/42 "2011-12-14T14:53:19Z")
…while they drive to their jobs at the telemarketing call center… ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/43 "2011-12-14T14:59:13Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > A Graham cracker is “a rectangular digestive biscuit”, a s’more is a “digestive-biscuit & melted-marshmallow sandwich” Little known fact: Graham crackers were invented to prevent masturbation. Discuss. ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/44 "2011-12-14T15:01:43Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Little known fact: Graham crackers were invented to prevent masturbation. Discuss. They don’t work. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/45 "2011-12-14T15:07:01Z")
This stinking thread needs to be locked up and buried. ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/46 "2011-12-14T15:08:10Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Little known fact: Graham crackers were invented to prevent masturbation. Discuss. Wooo! I’m eatin crackers like a mother-fucker! ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/47 "2011-12-14T15:08:25Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > , a s’more is a “digestive-biscuit & melted-marshmallow sandwich” You forgot the chocolate, you Philistine. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/48 "2011-12-14T15:15:31Z")
This stinking thread needs to be locked up and buried. ---
**Author:** ![Damuri\_Ajashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Damuri\_Ajashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damuri_Ajashi)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/49 "2011-12-14T15:24:18Z")
> [@Derleth](#): > > Poor whites are, at least to some extent, so that takes out ‘cracker’ and ‘redneck’ right there. Serious question. WTF is the difference between cracker, redneck and honky in modern use? My understanding is that redneck originally referred to coal miners who were organizing labor unions while resisting corporate thugs like the Pinkertons. They were called rednecks because they all wore red bandanas around their necks. How did the term for a rather important labor movement become a derogatory term for white people? On a related note, why do reagan worshippers beat up on unions when Reagan was the presdient of one of the most powerful unions in their industry. The SAG effectively maintains a closed shop on hollywood (actually the whole movie industry). On a tangentially related note, how did the term “grandfather” (as in “we have a new rule but we will grandfather you in”), which was an element of Jim Crow voting laws to exclude blacks from voting become so acceptable? > [@Shodan](#): > > I don’t tip fat waitresses. > > Regards, > Shodan Tipping was 15% during most of my adult life. Why should that percentage go up the way it has over the last few years? Has the cost of a meal not been keeping up with the cost of living? How do you justify the higher percentage? On a related note, papa johns charges $2 for delivery. Is there a reason why I shouldn’t reduce my tip by at least half of that delivery charge? I used to deliver pizza and the pizza shop owner made me buy the pizza in order to deliver it. If the guy didn’t pay then i had to bring back the pizza for a refund. I probably made more than the pizza shop on any given pizza. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/50 "2011-12-14T15:38:55Z")
> [@Euphonious\_Polemic](#): > > You forgot the chocolate, you Philistine. That comes built-in with the UK/South African digestives - you can get plain, but chocolate is more common. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/51 "2011-12-14T15:53:54Z")
Rednecks are southern working class white people who work outdoors in the sun. Noboby’s really sure of the origin of “cracker”. It might have meant someone who eats cracked corn (ie, grits), someone who brags, or someone who cracks a whip. Honky is a newer term for white people. Again the origin is obscure. As for the “grandfather” rule, during Jim Crow you had to take a literacy test before you could vote. The test was deliberately designed to be impossible to pass. However, if you could show that you had ancestors who had the right to vote, you were exempt. Obviously, only white people had ancestors who had the right to vote. ---
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/52 "2011-12-14T16:34:22Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > …while they drive to their jobs at the telemarketing call center… … in occupied Palestine … ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/53 "2011-12-14T17:07:39Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Little known fact: Graham crackers were invented to prevent masturbation. Discuss. _OUCH_ Fucking abrasive, they are. I for one will never masturbate with a graham cracker again! ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/54 "2011-12-14T17:14:05Z")
You have to dip them in the milk first, dummy. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/55 "2011-12-14T17:46:29Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Notice how cracker bigots aways leave out Triscuit. Rather telling, don’t you think? How am I a bigot? Triscuits are _factually_ inferior to Ritz and Nabisco - you just want to ignore science because it doesn’t fit in with your PC bullshit. Oh, OK - yeah, let’s not ask the _real_ questions because we might offend your tatses. You make me sick. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/56 "2011-12-14T17:59:49Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#): > > How am I a bigot? Triscuits are _factually_ inferior to Ritz and Nabisco - you just want to ignore science because it doesn’t fit in with your PC bullshit. Oh, OK - yeah, let’s not ask the _real_ questions because we might offend your tatses. You make me sick. I felt ill once when I ate too many roasted garlic Triscuits. So I make me sick, too! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/57 "2011-12-14T23:28:19Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Honky is a newer term for white people. Again the origin is obscure. As Cecil [noted](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/756/whats-the-origin-of-honky), the term originally referred to Eastern European immigrants, who were generically called Hungarians. Honky was a shortening of Hungarian. It eventually became a term for white people in general. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/58 "2011-12-14T23:32:03Z")
I have a question: Is it still racist if, you know, an _actual_ monkey is on a porch? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2011, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/59 "2011-12-14T23:59:43Z")
> [@G-SE](#): > > **And the niggers will rise up against the porch monkeys** 5,000 quatloos on the Porch Monkeys! ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2011, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103/60 "2011-12-15T00:00:46Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Little known fact: Graham crackers were invented to prevent masturbation. Discuss. Did they get Graham laid, then? How does that work? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-niggers-will-rise-up-against-the-porch-monkeys/606103.md?page=4)