# And the Worst Airport in the World Is ... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 27, 2009, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260 "2009-10-27T03:29:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/41 "2009-10-27T17:44:29Z")
> [@lieu](#): > > I can’t believe Miami isn’t on the list. Depart plane, go though baggage claim, drag all your luggage clear across airport to customs where lines are extraordinary and everyone reeks of coconut/bananna oil, convince them there’s nothing hidden in your butt, tote luggage clear back across airport to check in, wait, then board connecting flight. MIA is a PITA. Miami sucks all right. Poor design, surly employees, and the stink of mildewed carpet everywhere. Last I came back through there, I learned of a gate change only by happening to hear someone standing nearby mention it—asked a bored-looking gate agent who rolled his eyes and consulted a handwritten sheet of lined notebook paper to tell me where my gate was. Really pleasant when you’re already exhausted and irritable after a 9-hour flight from Brazil. The amount of “extra” money I’m willing to pay to fly non-stop has increased exponentially. Not every bargain is a bargain. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/42 "2009-10-27T17:47:10Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Last I came back through there, I learned of a gate change only by happening to hear someone standing nearby mention it—asked a bored-looking gate agent who rolled his eyes and consulted a handwritten sheet of lined notebook paper to tell me where my gate was. That happened to me in Providence once. The gate agents couldn’t care less. ---
**Author:** ![Any\_Other\_Name](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f17d59/32.png) [@Any\_Other\_Name](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Any_Other_Name)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/43 "2009-10-27T17:55:46Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > JFK - worst designed airport…ever. Designed? JFK was never designed, it grew, out of control, like a cancerous mass. Everytime I travel through it, the airport is in another one of endless re-configurations, like the house in Thirteen Ghosts. Wherever I go, when I return to JFK, I’m embarrassed to see it again in direct comparison to whatever airport I’ve just arrived from. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/44 "2009-10-27T18:01:06Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > He lives 500 feet from Logan? That must suck! _snerk_ Well, there’s a reason we schedule ~6-7 am Sunday return trip departure times, and we’re the “get there insanely early in case something happens” types, on top of that. Even with that, we still encounter more cars on the road than you’d think. (All probably going to Logan with the same reasoning in mind.) ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/45 "2009-10-27T18:23:52Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > Oh shit yeah. First time I arrived there, in 1998, they were having puja fires on the tarmac and the line through immigration was 3 hours long. Plus, the baggage handlers don’t seem to understand the concept of the conveyor belt, and there are guys whose job is to take your bag off the conveyor and dump it on the floor in a huge pile. WTF? > > The place was dark and dingy and dirty and it stank, and when I got to the door to go out, there were hundreds of faces pressed up against the glass, and hundreds more crowding exit, grabbing and pushing and hustling and trying to pickpocket. It was a horrible introduction to the country. > > I was back there earlier this year, and things had improved a wee bit, though not a huge deal. I’ve never been to Indira Gandhi airport, but I’m sure Charles de Gaulle gives it a run for its money. Charles de Gaulle airport is appallingly and disgustingly awful. It’s filthy; there’s trash everywhere. It smells. Everyone is rude, almost everyone smokes, and Customs is a bloody nightmare. Everyone in my organization hates CDG so much that the last time we had to go to France, we flew into Heathrow and took the Eurostar from Waterloo station into Paris. Heathrow is no walk in the park either, but at least it’s not a cesspool. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/46 "2009-10-27T18:41:25Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > I’ve flown in and out of O’Hare at least a hundred and fifty times and I don’t understand why people complain about it so much. It doesn’t seem to me to have any more delays than any other big airport. As has already been suggested; it’s likely just that lots of people fly through it and don’t see a lot of other airports. I flew through O’Hare every week for four months summer before last. It’s definitely not the worst airport, but I got delayed on every third flight and often had to spend the night at some hotel near the airport. The plusses for O’Hare is that there are several decent places to eat and decent shops and such. Minuses are the frequent enough delays, heavy traffic, the solar heating that makes it too hot for the A/C to handle in the summer, the layout (especially connecting in through the International Terminal). I thought Logan is much worse. ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/47 "2009-10-27T19:44:39Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > I flew through O’Hare every week for four months summer before last. It’s definitely not the worst airport, but I got delayed on every third flight and often had to spend the night at some hotel near the airport. > > The plusses for O’Hare is that there are several decent places to eat and decent shops and such. Minuses are the frequent enough delays, heavy traffic, the solar heating that makes it too hot for the A/C to handle in the summer, the layout (especially connecting in through the International Terminal). I thought Logan is much worse. I was just at Logan on Friday and, for reasons I’m still not clear on, had to go outside to get from terminal B to terminal A (Continental) baggage check. Don’t the two terminals connect? ---
**Author:** ![suranyi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@suranyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/suranyi)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/48 "2009-10-27T21:08:06Z")
> [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](#): > > I’ve only been to a handful but Laguardia is easily the worst. Seriously reminded me of when I took Greyhound regularly. > > I just flew in and out of Burbank a couple weeks ago. Very enjoyable, but I could see that place being awful during special events or holidays. Even during holidays it’s a heck of a lot better than LAX. I’ve flown down to Burbank for Thanksgiving every year for about 20 years. ---
**Author:** ![Ichbin\_Dubist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ichbin\_Dubist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichbin_Dubist)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/49 "2009-10-27T21:38:55Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > Obviously written by people who have not spent a ton of time in African airports. One day I’ll tell you about the airport in Bamako, which is outclassed by any Greyhound station on the planet. Long ago I spent a fascinating night in that airport (the place I was staying had no phones and I had no alarm clock, there was way I was waking up for a 5 AM flight). The arrival of a planeload of pale-ass high-school-aged Christian missionaries from Nebraska into that bizarre, grubby barn of lepers and hucksters was one of the funniest things I have ever observed at 4 AM. (And of course my flight actually left around an hour _early_. It was unsurprisingly mostly empty. That’s one way to fix a bad on-time record.) ---
**Author:** ![Candyman74](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Candyman74](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Candyman74)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/50 "2009-10-27T22:02:58Z")
It’s both the worst and the 5th best? Impressive statistics there, Lou! ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2009, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/51 "2009-10-27T22:14:31Z")
> [@Candyman74](#): > > It’s both the worst and the 5th best? Impressive statistics there, Lou! It’s the worst when you get there; the 5th best when you leave. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/52 "2009-10-28T03:31:41Z")
I guess you either love Heathrow or hate it. Of all the airports mentioned in this thread, I admit Kathmandu is not very great shakes, but the view of the Himalayas from the plane makes it all worth it. Honolulu Airport, however, we quite enjoy, possibly because it’s the portal to our beloved Hawaii. I even like the way the airport smells! We did have one bad incident on a trip there 4-1/2 years ago, but it was not the fault of the airport. We were returning to Thailand on China Airlines, and our flight was delayed something like 10 hours. Something was wrong with the plane, and they had to fly a new one in from Taiwan! My Thai wife had already passed through passport control and been stamped out of the country when we learned of this. Myself being an American, I could have just dumped my bags with her and said: “See ya in a few, Babe. I’m off to Waikiki.” But I hung out there with her. Since we’d arrived very early in the morning, we were a little groggy, but renovations going on made it hard to sleep. We thought about checking with Immigration to see if she could be stamped back into the country – she does maintain a 10-year visa in her passport at all times – but decided it would be too much trouble, what with having to go store our bags somewhere and then having to get back into the city and then back out to the airport, so decided to tough it out there. Luckily towards afternoon, I discovered the bar in the airport is rather decent. If Charles De Gaulle Airport really is that bad, then I feel doubly sorry for [Merhan Nasseri’s ordeal](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/981/has-a-guy-been-stuck-in-the-paris-airport-since-1988-for-lack-of-the-right-papers). ---
**Author:** ![Sleel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/73ab20/32.png) [@Sleel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleel)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/53 "2009-10-28T04:32:21Z")
I can’t imagine how Narita didn’t make the worst list. LAX is a smooth experience compared to the other end of my flight leaving or coming to Japan. Immigration is a fucking nightmare sometimes. The processing booths are usually understaffed and if more than one flight arrives close to another, there’s a huge mess while everyone tries to figure out how to line up since there are no clear guidelines and the intake hall is shallow and long. Everything clogs up right where you enter. You could easily be in line for an hour or more during busy times if you’re a regular tourist. Even with a return-entry permit, my wait is not inconsiderable. Getting your luggage is a similar mess, due to both poor layout and lack of space. The only place I’ve had to walk farther to get from one place to another is in the gignormous Houston horseshoe. Plus, it’s out in the middle of nowhere, with an hour train ride to Tokyo. Outgoing, there are two terminals, so you’ve got to double check to make sure you’re going to the right one for your airline. Japan does lots of things right, but as the only international airport for most flights, Narita makes an immediate bad impression that gets reinforced with repetition. ---
**Author:** ![Desert\_Nomad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desert_nomad/32/177_2.png) [@Desert\_Nomad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Desert_Nomad)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/54 "2009-10-28T05:10:37Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > Obviously written by people who have not spent a ton of time in African airports. One day I’ll tell you about the airport in Bamako, which is outclassed by any Greyhound station on the planet. > > Addis Ababa, though, has an absolutely beautiful airport, and flying on Ethiopian Air is a pleasure. Especially their awesome blankets. Kampala (Entebee) is pretty terrible but still better than Goma (DR Congo). ---
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Brother\_Walker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f08c70/32.png) [@Uncle\_Brother\_Walker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Brother_Walker)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/55 "2009-10-28T09:40:28Z")
Schiphol: I almost got mugged there once, so it goes on my ‘worst’ list. BWI: I got screwed (figuratively) by the parking lot guy. In my haste, I parked in short term parking on a long term trip. I had to pay $100+ for parking for four days. I offered to bribe the parking guy to ‘lose’ my ticket, as a lost ticket was only $40 or so. He didn’t do it and made me pay full price. I suspect the bastard pocketed the extra cash. Baltimore sucks. SATEX International Airport: The two terminals don’t connect, but I understand they’re doing construction nowadays, so maybe they’ll fix that. Then I can go home. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/56 "2009-10-28T11:48:32Z")
What’s so wrong with Logan? I’ve been through there a bunch of times, never had a problem. I don’t think of Heathrow as bad, just weird. My first time there we landed early and had to shut off the engines and be towed to the gate because of the noise rules. Then it was a bus from the international terminal to transfer to a plane to Germany. On the way back, it was unusual that there were no seats at the gate. I wish I could remember which terminal so you’d know what I’m talking about. The only place to wait seemed to be in the center of the terminal where all the shops were, and then when they called the flight, walk out to the gate. Which was kinda strange, but nothing actually wrong with doing it that way. Frankfurt seems about half as big as it ought to be. Gotta be bussed to where the planes are parked and climb the stairs, I hadn’t seen that in years. And when I thought I’d been through security, I walked a quarter mile and had to do it again. (Probably for a stricter screening to fly into the U.S.) Connects right to the rail system, though, which is nice. My lasting memory of Schiphol is the fly in the urinal. I can’t think of any that have been really bad. I like travelling, so it would take a truly sucky airport to bring me down. My one time through JFK was when Jet Blue was redoing the old TWA terminal. I wish I’d seen that building in its heyday, but I’m glad they’ve kept it in some fashion. ---
**Author:** ![Mycroft\_Holmes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a5b964/32.png) [@Mycroft\_Holmes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mycroft_Holmes)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/57 "2009-10-28T12:26:36Z")
> [@Uzi](#): > > … I can’t find the damn @ key. Is there some weird German equivalent? AltGr + Q. You probably had to use a QWERTZ-keyboard: [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:KB\_Germany.svg](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:KB_Germany.svg), but it should have shown the @ underneath the Q. I’m using a QWERTZ keyboard right now, but I get used to switching back and forth, since I only have QWERTY keyboards at home. ---
**Author:** ![kferr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/71e660/32.png) [@kferr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kferr)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/58 "2009-10-28T12:27:45Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Wouldn’t those be Heathrow and Charles de Gaule? > > I wasn’t terribly impressed with SFO. That shuttle train thingy is confusing as hell, and it took me forever to get through security. I almost missed my flight. I was really impressed with my last trip thru SFO. Using the train to/from the international terminal is easy and the train stops right at the car rental desks. When checking in for my return to London there were 2 people in front of me at the Virgin bag drop, and nobody at all in front of me at security! ---
**Author:** ![Uzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/91b2a8/32.png) [@Uzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uzi)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/59 "2009-10-28T12:31:38Z")
> [@Mycroft\_Holmes](#): > > AltGr + Q. I’d swear it wasn’t there, but in the panic of the moment and the anger afterwords I certainly could have missed it. I’ll see if I can remember to check when I go through Frankfurt again next month. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260/60 "2009-10-28T19:47:39Z")
I don’t know why everyone likes Schiphol so much. I had make a connection there once and it was like, two miles from point a to point b. It was fucking ridiculous. I mean, it wasn’t hot or cold and the people were nice enough, but that just struck me as terrible design. Is there no train system? I was carrying a bunch of heavy stuff, including my traumatized cat, and it was just a huge pain to lug everything that far. The Charlotte airport doesn’t have enough plugs. I had a layover there last year and I found one plug around my gate. A bunch of us sat on the floor and took turns charging our iPods and computers. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-the-worst-airport-in-the-world-is/515260.md?page=4)