# And Then The Murders Began **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [March 8, 2017, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716 "2017-03-08T19:09:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/61 "2017-03-09T04:57:56Z")
Every day, Commander Sam Vines of the City Watch would be home at 6 o’clock sharp to read to young Sam, who was one year old. And then the murders began. In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. And then the murders began. The beginning of the gospel of Jesus Christ, the Son of God; As it is written in the prophets, Behold, I send my messenger before thy face, which shall prepare thy way before thee. And then the murders began. I am Sam. And then the murders began. We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Thing\_Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@Thing\_Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thing_Fish)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/62 "2017-03-09T05:01:01Z")
A long time ago, when all the grandfathers and grandmothers of today were little boys and little girls or very small babies, or perhaps not even born , Pa and Ma and Laura and Baby Carrie left their little house in the Big Woods of Wisconsin. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/63 "2017-03-09T05:01:54Z")
The time came, however, when evil entered. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/64 "2017-03-09T05:26:54Z")
The morning I got it on was nice; a nice May morning. And then the murders began. Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. And then the murders began. If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don’t feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Thing\_Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@Thing\_Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thing_Fish)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/65 "2017-03-09T06:15:00Z")
Specially for the OP: I remember thinking, back around 1985, that Toronto’s outfield must have been one of the great outfields in baseball history. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/66 "2017-03-09T11:03:22Z")
“I see…” said the vampire thoughtfully, and slowly he walked across the room towards the window. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Stanislaus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stanislaus/32/3391_2.png) [@Stanislaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stanislaus)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/67 "2017-03-09T11:19:00Z")
I reached out a hand from under the blanket, and rang the bell for Jeeves. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/68 "2017-03-09T12:54:41Z")
Remember when you ran away And I got on my knees And begged you not to leave Because I’d go berserk? And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/69 "2017-03-09T14:02:40Z")
It was the afternoon of my eighty-first birthday, and I was in bed with my catamite when Ali announced that the archbishop had come to see me. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/70 "2017-03-09T14:17:12Z")
When he was nearly thirteen my brother Jem got his arm badly broken at the elbow. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/71 "2017-03-09T14:22:29Z")
The morning I got it on was nice; a nice May morning. And then the murders began. This thread is very sick and very hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/72 "2017-03-09T15:13:05Z")
Every time I look at you I don’t understand why you let the things you did get so out of hand. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/73 "2017-03-09T15:22:49Z")
“There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it. And then the murders began." ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/74 "2017-03-09T15:56:25Z")
In the great green room There was a telephone And a red balloon And a picture of- The cow jumping over the moon And there were three little bears sitting on chairs And two little kittens And a pair of mittens And a little toy house And a young mouse And a comb and a brush and a bowl full of mush And a quiet old lady who was whispering “hush”. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/75 "2017-03-09T16:23:53Z")
A green hunting cap squeezed the top of a fleshy balloon of a head. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/76 "2017-03-09T16:24:01Z")
“The hammer banged reveille on the rail outside camp HQ at five o’clock as always. And then the murders began.” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/77 "2017-03-09T16:35:51Z")
In an old house in Paris that was covered with vines/ Lived twelve little girls in two straight lines./ In two straight lines they broke their bread/ And brushed their teeth and went to bed./ They left the house at half past nine/ In two straight lines in rain or shine-/ The smallest one was Madeline. And then the murders began.” “Curt Wilcox’s boy came around the barracks a lot the year after his father died, I mean a lot, but nobody ever told him get out the way or asked him what in hail he was doing there again. And then the murders began.” ---
**Author:** ![Stanislaus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stanislaus/32/3391_2.png) [@Stanislaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stanislaus)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/78 "2017-03-09T16:44:46Z")
Quantities, and the ratio’s of quantities, which in any finite time converge continually to equality, and before the end of that time approach nearer the one to the other than by any given difference, become ultimately equal. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Stanislaus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stanislaus/32/3391_2.png) [@Stanislaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stanislaus)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/79 "2017-03-09T16:53:22Z")
When Farmer Oak smiled, the corners of his mouth spread till they were within an unimportant distance of his ears, his eyes were reduced to chinks, and diverging wrinkles appeared round them, extending upon his countenance like the rays in a rudimentary sketch of the rising sun. And then the murders began. The sweat wis lashing oafay Sick Boy; he wis trembling. And then the murders began. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2017, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716/80 "2017-03-09T17:36:23Z")
“It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love. And then the murders began." [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-then-the-murders-began/781716.md?page=5)