# And verily, the Lord of Hosts shalt stick his arm up your ass **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 15, 2003, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433 "2003-08-15T17:57:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![xcheopis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/bc8723/32.png) [@xcheopis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xcheopis)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/61 "2003-08-16T04:54:57Z")
Zoroastrian: I praise the good Mazdaean religion, which curtails discussions and quarrels, which brings about kinship or brotherhood, which has given me this arm up my ass… ---
**Author:** ![koeeoaddi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/koeeoaddi/32/408_2.png) [@koeeoaddi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/koeeoaddi)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/62 "2003-08-16T05:04:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gadfly \* > \*\*Koeeoaddi, I was taken by my Grandmother to a Quaker… Whatever, and to show applause, they waved their arms back and forth and turned their wrists. It was almost disturbing when they did it in unison. \*\* :eek: Anticipating the OP, no doubt. You went to Meeting much different than any I’ve ever been to, thankfully. Though Quakers _do_ differ mightily depending on which part of the country you’re in. ---
**Author:** ![moejuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@moejuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moejuck)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/63 "2003-08-16T05:07:03Z")
Black Panther Party: Whitey always has his arm up your ass! KKK: We only allow pure, white, american arms up our asses! ---
**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/64 "2003-08-16T05:12:17Z")
Plato: That which you feel up your ass is but a shadow of the Ideal Arm Descartes: It could be that an Evil Genius has his arm up my ass Berkeley: Your arm only exists insofar as I feel it up my ass ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/65 "2003-08-16T05:35:53Z")
Machiavelli: 'Tis better to fear the arm up your ass! ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/66 "2003-08-16T05:46:22Z")
Holy Trinity: The one arm up your ass is actually three. ---
**Author:** ![JonScribe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3be4f8/32.png) [@JonScribe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JonScribe)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/67 "2003-08-16T06:00:47Z")
Consumerism: I’ve got so much up my ass, I ain’t got room for your arm. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/68 "2003-08-16T06:08:28Z")
Nietze: The arm up your ass is dead. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/69 "2003-08-16T06:11:11Z")
Lao Tse: The arm up your ass is not the eternal arm. ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/70 "2003-08-16T06:15:33Z")
Zen: What is the sound of one ass flapping? Actually, I think we already know that sound. Native American: You are one with nature, so your ass is grass. Mao Tse-tung: Power grows from an arm up the ass. ---
**Author:** ![absoul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@absoul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/absoul)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/71 "2003-08-16T07:21:08Z")
Resigned: Is there anything that I can do to make your arm more comfortable? ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/72 "2003-08-16T07:30:12Z")
And the LORD said to Moses, “Has the LORD’s arm been shortened? Now you shall see whether what I say will happen to you or not.” Numbers 11:23 ---
**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/73 "2003-08-16T08:17:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Diogenes the Cynic \* > \*\*Nietze: > The arm up your ass is dead. \*\* The Arm Up Your Ass: Nietzsche is dead. Bonus points for anyone who explains it to Diogenes. ---
**Author:** ![Gadfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gadfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gadfly)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/74 "2003-08-16T09:51:50Z")
> [@](#): > > Though Quakers do differ mightily depending on which part of the country you’re in. I wouldn’t know - I’m canadian. ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/75 "2003-08-16T09:52:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Steve Wright \* > **From the point of view of this Christian: one of God’s attributes is omnipresence. It follows, therefore, that His arm is already up every ass in creation … am I wrong?** This reminds me of a conversation I had with a nun back in high school. She was chaperoning a dance and kept telling the couples to “leave room for the Holy Spirit” between them when they slow danced. I said that God, in all three Persons, was everywhere, right? She conceded this. Then I said, if He’s everywhere, He’s in every air molecule. And I’ve never seen two people dancing so closely that there wasn’t room for some air molecules in there. So the Holy Spirit was between even the couples that appeared to be sucking out one another’s tonsils to the tune of _Lady in Red_, right? This conversation has nothing to do with why I’m a godless heathen today, honest. But back to the matter at hand… Marxism: All history is the history of arms sticking up asses. Capitalism: The invisible hand of the market place will lead to a balance of arms and asses. McCarthyism: Are you now, or have you ever been, walking around with an arm stuck up your ass? ---
**Author:** ![I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_can_t_believe_that_s_butter)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/76 "2003-08-16T11:01:18Z")
Republican: I’ve had this same arm up my ass for 20 years, and it’s good for another 20! Democrat: This new slimline model lets me walk with more comfort, and this extra-long model doubles as a stool! Let me show you my pastel versions… ---
**Author:** ![Wicked\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/2acd7d/32.png) [@Wicked\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wicked_Blue)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/77 "2003-08-16T11:34:51Z")
Kermit the Frog: I don’t see what the big deal is. ---
**Author:** ![BrightNShiny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@BrightNShiny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrightNShiny)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/78 "2003-08-16T11:54:15Z")
Now see? If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t have this thread at all. 😛 Optimist: My ass is half-full with your arm. Pessimist: My ass is half-empty with your arm. ---
**Author:** ![Tiburon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e36b37/32.png) [@Tiburon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tiburon)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/79 "2003-08-16T12:12:47Z")
Hedonist: That arm up my ass feels good. Let’s go with it. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433/80 "2003-08-16T12:55:49Z")
Zig Ziglarism: Learn from me how to make a profit from the arm up your ass. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/and-verily-the-lord-of-hosts-shalt-stick-his-arm-up-your-ass/195433.md?page=5)