# Animals are hard **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 4, 2013, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465 "2013-12-04T11:12:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![SuperAbe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@SuperAbe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuperAbe)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/21 "2013-12-04T17:44:16Z")
> [@RobDog](#): > > Further to your side note. I love it when a web site shows you a picture of, say, a shirt in blue, and inform you that it’s also available in five other mysterious colours such as “crayon”, “regret”, “nucleus”, “egg” and “Croatia”. Thanks to you the front of my shirt is now covered in my morning coffee - and my monitor needs a wipedown. Jeez…now I gotta find a clean shirt… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/22 "2013-12-04T17:48:31Z")
Garanimals is the solution. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/23 "2013-12-04T18:07:22Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > I worked with a young woman once who refused to believe owls were birds. She didn’t know what they were, but she knew they weren’t birds. [They’re assholes.](http://www.theonion.com/articles/owls-are-assholes,9307/) ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/24 "2013-12-04T18:26:02Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Overheard many years ago at Canada’s Wonderland: “Look at the ducks! Look at the ducks!” > > As a mother pointed to the large and rather obvious swans. One of my mom’s greatest hits. We were on a boat on one of the Great Lakes (most likely the ferry to Mackinac Island, but it was a long time ago), and getting swarmed by gulls. “Look at the ducks!” says mom. As look would have it, her children were at the peak of their smart-ass stage. It started with excitedly identifying all bird sightings with “Look at the ducks!”, and degenerated to pretty much identifying anything as a duck. I don’t think that phase/phrase lasted much more than six months or so. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/25 "2013-12-04T18:27:39Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#): > > But it’s as scientifically accurate as weasels going pop. > [@gracer](#): > > Oh please let there be someone who actually thinks weasels go pop! Oh, but they [do](http://thewheelanddistaff.blogspot.com/2011/09/mystery-item-answer-weasel.html). ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/26 "2013-12-04T18:33:16Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > Several months apart, I ordered two different pairs of pajama pants from [target.com](http://target.com). One was described as “tiger” when it very clearly had cheetahs or leopards or whatever on it (yes, I don’t know the difference between all the spotted felines, but I do know spots from stripes!) and now I ordered one that was called “doves” and it is very clearly owls! Come on guys, hire some people who went to Kindergarten. I’m pretty sure these are the only two animal things I’ve ever ordered from Target, and both were very clearly wrong. They probably got them from the same people that made [this sign](http://blogitude.com/2006/01/07/koala-garden/). ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/27 "2013-12-04T18:42:43Z")
Argentina’s rugby team is known as “The Pumas”, doubtless because of their coat of arms which depicts the spotted face of a leopard-like cat, viz., a _jaguar_. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![rucciface](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ba9def/32.png) [@rucciface](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rucciface)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/28 "2013-12-04T19:15:21Z")
Am I crazy, or do weasels NOT poop? ---
**Author:** ![Atomic\_Alex](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atomic_alex/32/175_2.png) [@Atomic\_Alex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atomic_Alex)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/29 "2013-12-04T19:21:01Z")
> [@casdave](#): > > Which side of the conversation were you on? 🙂 Oh hah hah! 😃 > [@Floater](#): > > I once overheard a grandmother (judging by the age difference) tell her grandchild that the [white-coated animal with the long furry tail](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arctic_fox) walking around in the bear enclosure was a bear cub and the it would turn brown when it got bigger. Leaving aside the bizarreness of confusing those two animals with each other what was the baby bear, sorry I mean arctic fox doing in the same cage as the bears anyway? Isn’t one the prey of the other? > [@Shmendrik](#): > > I hate to interrupt the smarminess, but outside of a strictly biological context “animal” is often taken to mean mammal or vertebrate, as opposed to insects or even birds/fish. > > [Oxford Languages | The Home of Language Data](http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/us/definition/american_english/animal) I contest your definition of ‘strictly biological context’. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/30 "2013-12-04T19:23:47Z")
> [@rucciface](#): > > Am I crazy, or do weasels NOT poop? Yes. All around the mulberry bush. ---
**Author:** ![Marion\_Wormer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Marion\_Wormer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marion_Wormer)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/31 "2013-12-04T19:37:55Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Overheard many years ago at Canada’s Wonderland: “Look at the ducks! Look at the ducks!” > > As a mother pointed to the large and rather obvious swans. Depending on how old the child was, this may have been appropriate. A little kid (say 3) may know ‘ducks’ as a bird on the water. It’s like an adult pointing to a tractor in the field and saying ‘look at the truck’, because the kid likes trucks. Sometimes you’ll say _anything_ to make a kid happy. [QUOTE=floater] My ex is afraid of swans (she grew up in Northern Sweden where there aren’t any, at least not close to humans) so I’ve told her “It’s just a big duck”. Her response was “A big, nasty, ill-tempered duck, yo mean”. [/QUOTE] I was once attacked by a flock of ducks. I scampered like a small dog to the protection of my car. Everyone else got a big laugh. Ducks aren’t as mean as cattle, but in a group they can really peck. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/32 "2013-12-04T19:39:22Z")
> [@gracer](#): > > Oh please let there be someone who actually thinks weasels go pop! They do, though. In a microwave oven. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/33 "2013-12-04T19:46:46Z")
> [@Floater](#): > > My ex is afraid of swans (she grew up in Northern Sweden where there aren’t any, at least not close to humans) so I’ve told her “It’s just a big duck”. Her response was “A big, nasty, ill-tempered duck, yo mean”. 😉 Your ex- is actually quite correct in her irrational phobia. Don’t think they’re harmless just because they look ridiculous : swans (and ganders) can be very territorial and aggressive as hell without any provocation or warning. And they will fuck you _up_. They’ll bite, peck (which, because of the prehensile neck, feels like being hit by a Mexican luchador wielding a claw hammer), buffet, chase you around for ever. No joke. ---
**Author:** ![Airk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Airk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airk)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/34 "2013-12-04T20:27:09Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > Your ex- is actually quite correct in her irrational phobia. Don’t think they’re harmless just because they look ridiculous : swans (and ganders) can be very territorial and aggressive as hell without any provocation or warning. And they will fuck you _up_. They’ll bite, peck (which, because of the prehensile neck, feels like being hit by a Mexican luchador wielding a claw hammer), buffet, chase you around for ever. No joke. [So will Geese, apparently.](http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/01/dinosaur.html) ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/35 "2013-12-04T21:58:03Z")
I knew a guy in college who thought velvet was a color. (I wish I’d asked him which one.) I knew another guy at the same college who thought french fries were cooked in boiling water. ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/36 "2013-12-04T22:13:13Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > Argentina’s rugby team is known as “The Pumas”, doubtless because of their coat of arms which depicts the spotted face of a leopard-like cat, viz., a _jaguar_. :smack: The problem with the word puma is that it has been used as a generic term for “New World cat large enough to eat you.” While it has a specific modern meaning that separates it from jaguars, it wasn’t also used so specifically. ---
**Author:** ![Marion\_Wormer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Marion\_Wormer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marion_Wormer)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/37 "2013-12-04T22:15:05Z")
> [@Dendarii\_Dame](#): > > I knew a guy in college who thought velvet was a color. (I wish I’d asked him which one.) > > \ Velvet is always a ‘b’ color: Brown, or Blue, or Burgundy. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/38 "2013-12-04T22:52:26Z")
I was at a bus stop near a park at night, once, and a raccoon came out of the underbrush to scavenge in the garbage can. A family of British tourists waiting for the same bus had a lengthy conversation abou exactly what sort of animal it was. They settled on “squirrel.” ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/39 "2013-12-04T23:00:19Z")
> [@Marion\_Wormer](#): > > Velvet is always a ‘b’ color: Brown, or Blue, or Burgundy. It’s funny that you say that, because I would insist that if velvet must be a color, then it is black. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2013, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465/40 "2013-12-04T23:17:26Z")
Years ago a guy\*\* asked me what the capital of New England was. \*\* puts in order for one (1) Croatian-colored shirt \*\* > [@rucciface](#): > > Am I crazy, or do weasels NOT poop? I had three, years ago. Oh, my goodness, do they poop. Do they ever. \*\* who may or may not be my ex :smack::smack::smack: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/animals-are-hard/675465.md?page=3)