# Ann Coulter's jaw wired shut **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 26, 2008, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514 "2008-11-26T01:58:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/81 "2008-11-28T02:46:15Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > You know the difference between you and a lying sack of shit? A lying sack of shit has more class. You’re going to tell me that after all the threads on this board where people savaged the idiocy spewed out by Coulter (and sometimes on a _weekly_ basis, if she’s on a roll), you honestly thought that no one here would say anything harsh about her? Clearly, if _not_ an attention seeking troll, you are as dumb as the proverbial stump, nor would I be so inclined as to rule out the possibility that you are, in fact, _both._ > > Coulter and her ilk need to be mocked as often and as ruthlessly as possible. Tucker, thank you very much for arguing my point for me so eloquently. And proving it so soundly. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/82 "2008-11-28T02:56:52Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > Tucker, thank you very much for arguing my point for me so eloquently. And proving it so soundly. Oh, no, _you’ve_ done a far better job than I could ever hope to do at proving you’re a lying sack of shit and a troll. I, good sir, am not even an amateur in comparison to you. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/83 "2008-11-28T03:05:59Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > I used to think that the people that frequented this board had class. Then I read this thread. Funny, I thought we started losing class the day you registered. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/84 "2008-11-28T05:11:25Z")
She writes “satire” for people anxious to believe that they have a sense of humor. She’s as smart as a rattlesnake, but she lacks the warmth. ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/85 "2008-11-28T05:36:48Z")
I still find this news difficult to credit. I would have bet any money that icebreaker mandible of hers was the most indestructible part of her body. After the nuclear fires died down, that osseous prow would still remain intact amid the ashes, impaling cockroaches upon its vicious summit for nigh unto eternity. Maybe she’ll get a bionic replacement. “Let me just say a few things about [liberals…](http://www.rozziland.com/eq/null20.wav)” ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/86 "2008-11-28T05:57:46Z")
Is this the face that lunched a thousand ships? ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/87 "2008-11-28T08:04:28Z")
> [@gonzomax](#): > > How can a reasonably normal healthy young person fall and break their jaw. First thing that popped into my head is that there’s a link between eating disorders and premature osteoporosis… In any case there’s not a lot of tissue to pad those bones. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/88 "2008-11-28T14:02:21Z")
The words emanating from her jaw have been inhuman. Now her jaw is broken. Perhaps the alien pupa nesting in her jaw finally hatched and flew away, breaking her jaw in the process. If Coulter stops making inhuman statements once her jaw is no longer wired, we’ll know that it was an alien that had been controlling her jaw; if she continues to make inhuman statements, then we’ll know that it is she who is inhuman. ---
**Author:** ![xenophon41](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xenophon41/32/253_2.png) [@xenophon41](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xenophon41)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/89 "2008-11-28T14:13:56Z")
I am _sick_ and _tired_ of the unsympathetic and inhumane comments regarding Coulter’s tragic condition! Don’t you people realize that unless those wires are removed in the next few weeks she may not be able to complete her monthly feeding? That jaw has to unhinge all the way for her to swallow a girl scout whole, you know. ---
**Author:** ![tagos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@tagos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tagos)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/90 "2008-11-28T16:05:22Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > Wait, so you’re saying she broke her jaw giving _Bill Clinton a blow job?_ Aw, come on, now, the man’s got _some_ standards! If the Presidential Wang can break the jaw of a gazelle-swallowing reptile like Coulter it’s no wonder Hillary cuts him so much slack. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/91 "2008-11-29T03:30:03Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > Oh, no, _you’ve_ done a far better job than I could ever hope to do at proving you’re a lying sack of shit and a troll. I, good sir, am not even an amateur in comparison to you. Let’s see - I point out that you and others have no class because of the absolute gutter viciousness of the attacks that have been posted against Ann Coulter. And for pointing that fact out, you label me a lying sack of shit and a troll. You and many others have apparently never learned that ad hominem attacks like the one I quoted above are a clear indication that you cannot refute what was said, so you attack the person who said it. Way to go, Tucker. You confirmed it again. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/92 "2008-11-29T03:38:57Z")
And I have no doubt that he is bitterly ashamed, struck to the quick by your incisive observation. Bad **Tucker**! Bad! Go lay down by your water dish! ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/93 "2008-11-29T03:43:40Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > I used to think that the people that frequented this board had class. Then I read this thread. If you think this thread is particularly bad, you must not hang out in the Pit. And why shouldn’t we mock the injury of someone who spews hate? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/94 "2008-11-29T04:13:33Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > Let’s see - I point out that you and others have no class because of the absolute gutter viciousness of the attacks that have been posted against Ann Coulter. And for pointing that fact out, you label me a lying sack of shit and a troll. > > You and many others have apparently never learned that ad hominem attacks like the one I quoted above are a clear indication that you cannot refute what was said, so you attack the person who said it. Way to go, Tucker. You confirmed it again. Ah, yes, you’re the one to speak about class. After all, you’d _never_ run around in the celebratory election night threads screaming, “You people are voting for a socialist! You’re voting for a socialist! He’s going to ruin _everything!_ We’re doomed!” or words to that effect, now would you? Oh, wait, you _did_. While most of the McCain supporters on this board accepted their defeat with _class_, you had hysterics. **Nothing** in this thread, has been spewed with the same level of vile hate and inhumanity with which Coulter has made her money vomiting forth. Nor, does it even have a _tenth_ of the audience that she routinely reaches. This place is **not** a gentleman’s social club from the 1800s, it is a rather obscure message board in a medium which, at its core, is little more than a place for people to slander one another anonymously and exchange porn. Lastly, you, of all people, who is _incapable_ of holding a cogent discussion on _anything_, preferring, instead, to regurgitate the thoroughly discredited and disowned talking points of the more extreme factions of the Republican party, has as much business telling people what “class” is, as does the character “Booger” from _Revenge of the Nerds_. If you had any modicum of class or intelligence you would **not** be commenting against those who are now laughing at Coulter’s expense, instead, you’d be castigating the media for giving her _any_ attention at all, but you don’t do that. And the only logical conclusion that one can draw from this is that you actually subscribe to the woman’s ravenings. That you’re not presently defending her to a larger extent, is symbolic of the fact that you’re a craven little coward, too chickenshit to take the heat you’d get for defending her. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/95 "2008-11-29T04:48:26Z")
> [@Captain\_Carrot](#): > > If you think this thread is particularly bad, you must not hang out in the Pit. _That’s_ why Mother doesn’t let me post here! ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/96 "2008-11-29T22:20:51Z")
So, **Tuckerfan** , if I understand fully what your beautifully written riposte, at its core, is driving at … is that there’s porn made available on the internet? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/97 "2008-11-29T23:34:34Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > So, **Tuckerfan** , if I understand fully what your beautifully written riposte, at its core, is driving at … is that there’s porn made available on the internet? So I’ve heard it said. I’ve not actually bothered to investigate that as of yet, but I fully intend to get around to it one day. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2008, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/98 "2008-11-29T23:55:39Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > So I’ve heard it said. I’ve not actually bothered to investigate that as of yet, but I fully intend to get around to it one day. O brave new web, that has such titties in it! ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2008, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/99 "2008-12-01T01:11:16Z")
> [@outlierrn](#): > > If I’d wanted to day something mean, I would have said she got sodomized by the Karma stick. Oh, that reminds me. “Green Mile” is on cable tonight. Thank You! ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2008, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514/100 "2008-12-01T02:23:27Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > Ah, yes, you’re the one to speak about class. After all, you’d _never_ run around in the celebratory election night threads screaming, “You people are voting for a socialist! You’re voting for a socialist! He’s going to ruin _everything!_ We’re doomed!” or words to that effect, now would you? Oh, wait, you _did_. While most of the McCain supporters on this board accepted their defeat with _class_, you had hysterics. > > **Nothing** in this thread, has been spewed with the same level of vile hate and inhumanity with which Coulter has made her money vomiting forth. Nor, does it even have a _tenth_ of the audience that she routinely reaches. This place is **not** a gentleman’s social club from the 1800s, it is a rather obscure message board in a medium which, at its core, is little more than a place for people to slander one another anonymously and exchange porn. > > Lastly, you, of all people, who is _incapable_ of holding a cogent discussion on _anything_, preferring, instead, to regurgitate the thoroughly discredited and disowned talking points of the more extreme factions of the Republican party, has as much business telling people what “class” is, as does the character “Booger” from _Revenge of the Nerds_. If you had any modicum of class or intelligence you would **not** be commenting against those who are now laughing at Coulter’s expense, instead, you’d be castigating the media for giving her _any_ attention at all, but you don’t do that. And the only logical conclusion that one can draw from this is that you actually subscribe to the woman’s ravenings. That you’re not presently defending her to a larger extent, is symbolic of the fact that you’re a craven little coward, too chickenshit to take the heat you’d get for defending her. Methinks Tucker doth protest too much. I obviously hit a nerve. And guess what, Tucker - she’s right far more often than you are. Deal with it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ann-coulters-jaw-wired-shut/474514.md?page=6)