Oh boy, we have parity! A Moe Howard riposte in return. Life is good!
I can’t stand people with acne who readily pick at it in public with no sense of ambiguity. They just sit there with that really concentrated look, almost as if they are simultaneously taking a dump! Holy hell!
It makes me CRAZY when people use the word “irregardless.” It’s actually a word (I’m a big enough dork that I looked it up), but it’s a combination of irrespective and regardless, both of which mean essentially the same thing!
<p>Another thing that annoys me is the way I laugh sort of half-heartedly after I say something I think is funny. My fiance has been kind enough to laugh at me for it, and I’m hoping to enter a 12-step program to break this obnoxious habit. Heh, heh heh…Um.
One of my best friends does this. It takes her forever to tell a story, and most of the time we’ve heard it before. She has to give every detail and quote as if she’s telling it for the first time. It drives me nuts.
A former boss of mine has a number of really annoying habits. For starters he seems to think he’s a New York Italian and I think this is where all of his annoying habits come from. In fairness he was born in New York but his last name is Stevens and he’s lived in Alaska for more than 25 years…
Anyway he’s one of those guys that thinks it’s really sexy to have some chest hair showing above where his shirt’ts buttoned. Unfortunately for him, and the rest of the office, he wasn’t a very hairy guy so in order to show off his manly chest hair he had to keep the TOP THREE BUTTONS UNDONE on any given shirt. What’s really disturbing about all of this is that it all 8 people that worked for him were male. I have no idea who he was trying to show off for…
Also, every time he would start talking he would make a sniffing sound and kinda twitch his head to the side, for really long sentances he’d pause dramatically and insert another <sniff> <twitch> for effect. A typical conversation was kinda like this:
HIM: <sniff> <twitch> So, ahh, how’s your project going.
ME: It’s going well, have a busy weekend coming up.
HIIM: <sniff> <twitch> So, you know this is a really important contract your working on… <sniff> if you keep them happy it could mean more ahh business from them.
ME: Well everythings going smoothly, I’ve heard no complaints.
HIM: <sniff> <twitch> Yo! Vinnie whatdaya think about my chest hair! Forgettabout it <sniff> <twitch> <sniff> <twitch> <sniff> <twitch>
etc…
Needless to say it was very distracting trying to work around this half dressed, twitching, b-movie mafia player wanna be all damn day. Fortunately he mostly hid in office indulging in megalomaniac fantasies about taking over the world. I’m glad I’m not there anymore!
I knew there was a reason I didn’t visit the SDMB with food in hand.
I know a fairly educated guy who smacks his lips while he eats…looks disgusting and sounds like sloppy oral sex - which in the lunchroom, ain’t pretty.
Another woman at work will ALWAYS figure out a way to put her daughter and son-in-law in the conversation:
Me: I ate an orange this morning and…
Her: My daughter’s favorite color is orange. She went shopping yesterday and she bought [and off this woman goes on a tangent].
I know a bunch of people on an (un-named) internet board who constantly use the phrase “jump the shark” as if it is new and witty. They might as well call good shows “groovy” and “happenin’”.
Gorgon, yes, he actually does speak that way. He also uses “um” alot, or will stop in the middle of a sentence and forget what he was talking about. I was taking dictation from him while I was in the midst of a pissy mood, and typed out every “UM”", “Say” and incomplete sentence. Then I read it back to him.
Let’s just say that we are glad he is not a violent man. He was none too pleased but it did get the point across, for a few hours, anyway.
Someone I know will pick her teeth with any piece of paper that happens to be handy. (As if she’s flossing with it.) And just put it back when she’s done. Even when there is dental floss available. . . shudder This person is another public nose picker (but she’s using a napkin! Isn’t that better? Um, no, we’re in a restaurant. People are trying to eat. Stop it!!!)
Chewing with the mouth open. Or talking while chewing. My Mother-in-law does this ALL the time and it’s disgusting.
Also, people who can’t tell the difference between the possessive “its” and the contraction “it’s.”
My gripe is riding as a passenger with a driver who’s not very alert. On a moderately busy freeway we’re constantly coming right up behind a slower vehicle in the right lane. Only when we’ve braked down to his speed and are 6’ from his rear bumper is it time to check whether the left lane is open. It generally is, at which point we move left, accelerate, pass, move right and then repeat the entire process.
I work with the “EHHHH!” guy. Every two minutes or so he’ll clear his throat by loudly saying “EHHHH!” It doesn’t even sound like someone clearing their throat - shout that phrase for one second and you’ve got it. You can hear him in his office, even with the door closed to your office and his office. It is a physical impossibility to listen to him in a meeting when he has the floor. “I’d like to talk about OrgChart integration before we move on. EHHHH!” I feel like I’m in that Vonnegut story where they interrupt your brain flow with a loud noise to keep you stupid.
EHHHH!
Johnny, thanks for providing a general-gripe thread. I wanted to talk about this lady at the office, but it didn’t seem worth starting its own thread…
She talks on the phone for several hours each day. She’s in the next cubicle over, so I hear every word. It always goes like this:
[RING] "Hello? Oh hi! How are you?
Um-hum,
Um-hum,
Um-hum,
Um-hum,
[several thousand um-hums deleted for space]
Now, I don’t care in the least that she’s on the phone practically all day. None of my business. I can only suppose she’s a really nice lady, who is a sympathetic ear to her mother / sister / best friend / child / whoever is calling. Perhaps she thinks the caller is terribly tedious, and I admire her for being nice to the non-stop talker. But the "Um-hum"s are driving me batty.
I often put on my earphones as soon as it starts, and blast the music. It drowns her out successfully. But … the music has soft parts. And there’s a few seconds of silence between the tracks. What’s in those parts?
"Um-hum,
Um-hum,
Um-hum,
Um-hum,
You don’t say?
Really?
Oh, no!
Oh!
Um-hum,
I think you did the right thing.
Um-hum,
Um-hum,
Um-hum,
…
For some reason that brought to mind the repressed memory of an ex-coworker who had a terminal case of “one-upmanship.” No matter what it was you said, he had experienced something better. (It was a terminal case because I’m sure someday someone will kill him.)
“I found a dollar on the sidewalk!”
“Well, I once found ten dollars!”
“I’m thinking about getting a puppy.”
“We’re thinking about getting a pot-bellied pig.”
If you told a story about something bizzarre that happened to you, he would “up the ante” with an even * more * bizzare thing that happened to him. If you discussed a problem you were having, he would tell a story about having worse problems. And if it hadn’t happened to him, he knew someone it had happened to. Any story of good luck, and he had one of even better luck.
And he wondered why I stopped talking to him.
Oh yeah? Well I had this co-worker who would… 
Actually, I’m normally pretty easy to get along with (I think). But there’s this one co-worker I have who does the “EHHHHH” thing, only with “MMMMMM,” and yes, it gets really old really fast. Also the brushing his teeth in the kitchen sink. And the random offers of backrubs when the computers are down. :eek:
Ooh, I can sneak this rant about my darling husband in here, so I don’t end up with a lame Pit rant about the man I love.
He refuses to blow his nose in public, even if I’m the only representative of “the public” present. This is all well and good, except that if he needs to blow his nose, he’ll snuffle instead. Just blow your damn nose! One nose-blow is infinitely less disgusting than the incessant “sniff…sniff…sniff.” We have boxes of tissue located in strategic areas of the house, I carry it with me, there’s some in the car…just blow your damn nose!
Oh, and his family all chew with their mouths open, make smacky noises while they eat, and talk with their mouths full. I should be grateful that he somehow either didn’t pick up the habit or overcame it. I really didn’t notice this as much before we had children whom I’m compelled to correct when they do these things, but it’s really been grating on me for the past ten years or so.
Thank you.
Indygrrl, Audrey, I know exactly how you feel. I have a friend who does exactly the same thing, and I’ve gotten to the point where I just flatly interrupt with “You’ve told me this story before,” and if he keeps going, I tell him I don’t want to hear it. Sounds rude, I know, but after hearing every story eight times over, my patience is about shot. Especially since before I started doing that, I reminded him about forty times that I hate having things repeated to me when there’s no need for it.
A guy at work often tells corny jokes. When nobody laughs he repeats the punchline. When nobody laughs the second time, he repeats the punchline LOUDER. Invariably his desire to command a laugh from people is far more entertaining than whatever joke he was trying to tell. It’s just not entertaining in any way that reflects positively on him.
Another coworker yells his sneezes. While he’s sneezing, he’ll yell “AH CHOO” at the top of his lungs. It’s odd.
I do that. 
And when nobody laughs, I pretend to start to explain it: “Because, y’see…” The joke is there is no joke. (Of course, I know that the jokes are bad and I don’t expect people to laugh. I amuse myself.)
Not a cow-orker of mine, but one that others on the floor below talk about. He’s an older guy who has intestinal problems. He farts a lot. I either had not yet been told, or I had forgotten. I was walking past his cubicle and passed by a co-worker coming the other way. Smelling something rancid I thought, “Geez, girl!” Another time we were getting into an elevator. I don’t know who was in there before, but I gagged, turned on my heel, and caught the next one.
Ahh, such a great topic for fuming :-D.
MLS, i was wondering if the typed print of its and it’s annoyed you? I know i commonly do not type the ’ because it saves me time. (though, it is only one more key stroke and would grant me at most 1-5 sec. of extra time in my day to squander on meaningless tasks.) But what is even worse (in my opinion) is when people misuse your and you’re (youre)! Boy oh boy is that annoying.
I also have a roommate that does some extremely annoying and disturbing things… (Yay! i finally get to list them :-D)
For starters he does the typical things that the numerous roommates have a problems with such as the lack of cleaning, leaving dirty dishes pile up (this could be covered in the first example, but oh well)
But here’s the odd things. While in the shower (that has never been cleaned by him >:o), he decides to blow his nose and hack up and phelm (SP?) that he might have… EVERYDAY! These arent your avg. hacks and blows either. Like i can hear every pucntuated sound that emits from his ritual in the furthest part of the apt. Oh and i have also heard while outside! And yes i have asked him to stop performing the habit or perhaps not do it as loud, but he will so couteously will reply, “I’m not going to stop. You wouldnt have the problem if your bed wasnt next to the wall.” Yes, i have my bed against the wall that is between the shower and my room, but still, the sound of the shower is a better alarm clock (or sound in general) than an orchestra of mucous and phelm.
I do my share of habits that he doesnt like as well though, such as not refilling the brita pitcher when there is at least a glass of water (in amount) left in the pitcher. Yes, i do fill the pitcher, that is when it is empty, but that is something that i do that he says annoys him. And his retaliation of it is by emptying the pitcher completely and setting it out… yea im sorry i left any water in the pitcher. Another habit of mine that (i do admit is somewhat disgusting, but isnt that bad) i do is i dont flush the toilet after i pee in it. What im saving water… and the environment. I dont see what is digusting about it (i do clean the toilet ona regular basis) unless of course you are placing your head down and around the toilet… which would be rather odd.
I forgot to mention that my roommate also tends to play on his fooseball table an hour or two after i have already went to sleep. Approximately 2 AM.
Yea, if u were thinking that im not living with him next year, you are right., but i guess inconsiderate-ness(?) is the main habit that is annoying.
My SO’s dad is has some really annoying things that he does. For example, he uses the same jokes over and over again… and they arent even funny! Things like when talking about food he’ll claim that eating will put hair on your chest. At this pt, he’ll pull down his collar and exclaim, “See.” I cant think of any exact things that he also does, but still i have to provide a little smile to be nice. im such a phoney.
I also hate it when people get into a debate and can only use one or two points and reverberate them redundantly to prove his or her main point.
I think thats about it for now… damn im easily annoyed.