# Anonymous Gay Sex in the Park - Common? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 25, 2006, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788 "2006-11-25T22:25:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/21 "2006-11-26T10:06:34Z")
As noted in my location, I have lived in many large cities, and I cannot think of a single city that did NOT have an outdoor park area that was known for cruising for sex. My best guess is that this has been going on since cave men went out to kill a rabbit for the wife to cook for dinner, and took a detour through the woods. I have mentioned this on the boards before, but when I was living in Berlin, an older man told me that his father told him (before WWII) that if he was feeling horny, he should walk through the park at night and let some guy give him a blow job. It was considered “normal” for straight guys to go there and get a quick one if the girlfriend/wife was not around or interested. As many straight women have noted, men are pigs…and when it comes to having sex, they like to congregate where it is available, be it a hetero strip club or a Gay park…and nice, quiet parks are not a bad location (summer and nice weather usually). Some fresh air, a nice walk, and maybe another dude who is horny who wants to go behind that tree. The great thing about meeting someone in the park - nobody cares if you are rich or poor…nobody cares if you are married or single…they are looking for quick, anonymous sex. Why the police go there is a mystery to me…as long as there are no complaints, no pedophilia, and no grandmothers are walking their dogs at midnight, why would anyone care? I have heard some interesting stories about police who volunteer to work those areas at night, and let’s just say they don’t arrest every guy they meet. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Slant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c57346/32.png) [@Mr.Slant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Slant)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/22 "2006-11-26T16:03:55Z")
[QUOTE=ZipperJJ] SNIP It just doesn’t seem right that gay males would be more inclined to go find anonymous sex than straight males would, and that the best place they can think to go is a public park. Is it perhaps that the straight females wouldn’t go along with it (seriously)? [/QUOTE] The answer to the question in your final sentence is ‘YES’. If the park next to your house became known as a good place to anonymously screw hot chicks, the cops would be setting up a bicycle patrol on the overnight shift before Decmber 1st… ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/23 "2006-11-26T16:24:56Z")
[QUOTE=ZipperJJ] Why is this such a common practice, anyway? Is this really something that is common in the gay male community, or do straight folks do it to and it just doesn’t get publicized/eradicated? It just doesn’t seem right that gay males would be more inclined to go find anonymous sex than straight males would, and that the best place they can think to go is a public park. Is it perhaps that the straight females wouldn’t go along with it (seriously)? [/QUOTE] It’s not that hard to understand. Up until relatively recently, going to a gay bar wasn’t that much of an option. The cops would chase you out of there too and I suppose it’s easier to theoretically explain what you were doing in a park than what your were doing in a gay bar. Even now with all our gay liberation, there are lots of closeted and/or married guys who don’t want to be seen in a gay bar. Parks are kind of like red light districts except you don’t usually have to pay the hooker. Everyone gives it up for free. Is the concept that there’s a red light district somewhere in town really all that shocking to most people? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/24 "2006-11-26T17:22:42Z")
In Madison there’s periodic press about police sweeps through Olin Turville Park for pretty much the same. Do a Google for “gay parks police activity”, and you’ll turn up a lot of relevant stories. ---
**Author:** ![threemae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f9b8f/32.png) [@threemae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threemae)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/25 "2006-11-26T18:05:24Z")
[QUOTE=DMark] Why the police go there is a mystery to me…as long as there are no complaints, no pedophilia, and no grandmothers are walking their dogs at midnight, why would anyone care [/QUOTE] Well that’s exactly the crux of it. I have no problem with gay people, but public sex that often isn’t all that discrete isn’t very cool. ---
**Author:** ![Stout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Stout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stout)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/26 "2006-11-26T19:37:13Z")
Every place I’ve ever lived has had a park or two like this, and I have been hearing that rumour that the guys in the park are mostly straight guys just looking for sex, for as long as I’ve known about the existance of these parks. It’s always struck me as kind of odd though, the straight part I mean. Bisexual, and leading a straight life I could understand, but I’m unable to grok just why a straight guy would seek out other men for sex simply because he’s horny. There are alternatives you know. The only “problems” I’ve ever had with these guys is inadvertantly stumbling on something going on in the bushes when I’m out mountain biking, but now I’m wiser, I know what that guy wearing a leather jacket, standing in the bushes in the pouring rain, at 10 am on a tuesday, is doing there. I usually make a judgement call based on the leather jacket density, to determine whether I’m going to ride on those trails, in that park, on that day. But one trick that works well for keeping these guys at a distance…carry a camera. Just raise it to your eye, and poof!!! watch these guys scatter. Out of curiosity…Is homosexuality still illegal in parts of the United States ? ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/27 "2006-11-26T19:57:12Z")
[QUOTE=Stout] Out of curiosity…Is homosexuality still illegal in parts of the United States ? [/QUOTE] In the sense of marrying the person you want to be homosexual with? As for why a straight guy would want to let another guy service him I dunno. Because guys get horny and under the right circumstances their willing to dig a whole in the ground and fuck the earth? Oh, c’mon. Guys don’t fuck washclothes, socks, pillows, mattresses, and blow-up dolls? If you’re a closeted gay guy or bisexual, you may be going after the “gay” part but a straight guy might must be going for the “get off” part because the washclothes, socks, pillows, and mattresses aren’t quite cutting it tonight. ---
**Author:** ![Hirundo82](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/919ad9/32.png) [@Hirundo82](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hirundo82)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/28 "2006-11-26T23:07:57Z")
[QUOTE=Stout] Out of curiosity…Is homosexuality still illegal in parts of the United States ? [/QUOTE] No, all remaining sodomy laws in the United States were invalidated in 2003 by the US Supreme Court decision [Lawrence v. Texas](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_v._Texas). ---
**Author:** ![Stout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Stout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stout)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/29 "2006-11-26T23:25:38Z")
Hot damn Hirundo82…After reading levdrakon’s post, I went a googling and came up with the very same answer. Thanks for the wiki link. Levdragon,you figure these “straight” guys are motivated by thinking something like “any port in a storm”?? It sounds plausible,but it is a far cry from masturbation. Nobody REALLY fucks those blow up dolls do they??? ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/30 "2006-11-26T23:48:24Z")
[QUOTE=Loach] In fact most of the guys arrested in the particular area in my town seem to be married and straight. Go figure. “Sorry officer I just stopped to take a piss in the woods. I guess the three other guys in the circle holding their dicks were pissing too.” [/QUOTE] You misspelled “claim to be”. It is not spelled “seem.” ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/31 "2006-11-26T23:52:27Z")
[QUOTE=ZipperJJ] Why is this such a common practice, anyway? Is this really something that is common in the gay male community, or do straight folks do it to and it just doesn’t get publicized/eradicated? It just doesn’t seem right that gay males would be more inclined to go find anonymous sex than straight males would, and that the best place they can think to go is a public park. Is it perhaps that the straight females wouldn’t go along with it (seriously)? [/QUOTE] Perhaps the problems is that straight females are not so prone to hang out in parks seeking anonymous sex? ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2006, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/32 "2006-11-26T23:56:39Z")
Well, this explains Savannah, Georgia, city of parks. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/33 "2006-11-27T00:01:37Z")
[QUOTE=Stout] Hot damn Hirundo82…After reading levdrakon’s post, I went a googling and came up with the very same answer. Thanks for the wiki link. Levdragon,you figure these “straight” guys are motivated by thinking something like “any port in a storm”?? It sounds plausible,but it is a far cry from masturbation. [/quote] Alternatively, a walk in the park leading to a mistaken encounter provides cover for closeted gay guys. They can even claim, if they’re caught in flagrante, that they’re straight and they just did it because they’re horny. Frankly, if you engage in gay sex, there’s probably a reason. Possibly a … gay reason. > [@](#): > > Nobody REALLY fucks those blow up dolls do they??? Of course not. Guys have their standards. Real Dolls, though … they get fucked senseless. Or they would, if they had any. ---
**Author:** ![boytyperanma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4491bb/32.png) [@boytyperanma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boytyperanma)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/34 "2006-11-27T00:57:41Z")
[QUOTE=Stout] Out of curiosity…Is homosexuality still illegal in parts of the United States ? [/QUOTE] [QUOTE=Hirundo82] No, all remaining sodomy laws in the United States were invalidated in 2003 by the US Supreme Court decision [Lawrence v. Texas](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_v._Texas). [/QUOTE] The Lawrence v Texas established consentual acts in private are not criminal. Meaning on private property. People who take part in homosexual activities in public places can still be charged with breaking sodomy laws in various states that prohibit homosexual sex. In states like Virginia a heterosexual couple caught having sex in the park has relitively minor consiquences. A homosexual couple having sex in the park can result in very stiff penalties. ---
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/35 "2006-11-27T01:29:01Z")
[QUOTE=boytyperanma] A homosexual couple having sex in the park can result in very stiff penalties. [/QUOTE] …waiting… ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/36 "2006-11-27T02:22:43Z")
[QUOTE=Green Bean] Ah, that’s different. I don’t know whether publishing the names and addresses was anti-gay or not, but it’s a possibility. I’d like to know if they’ve published the names of people guilty of other types of “sex crimes,” like prostitution. [/QUOTE] If it’s a “sex crime” would getting arrested for this require someone to register as a sex offender? That would be pretty serious indeed. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/37 "2006-11-27T03:37:13Z")
This appears to be much more commonplace in some parts of the world than others. For example, **Potter** used to tell me that this (and the related “cottaging,” cruising in certain well-known public washrooms) is a far more usual way to spend the evening in the UK than it seems to be in Canada (perhaps because there are certain seasons in Canada during which you don’t necessarily want to be doing this). Be that as it may, the question was asked whether law enforcement against guys doing this was homophobic. Now on the face of it the answer seems to be “no” - public sex is illegal regardless of who’s doing it. However, under many circumstances the enforcement _can_ be homophobic. For example, if police let straight couples go with a warning and arrest gay couples (which a policewoman speaking to one of **Hamish** ’s courses informed them was fairly commonplace), or if they subject their arrestees to homophobic abuse while arresting them, or the like. It’s also pretty weird when arguments about protecting the children are invoked in cases where the cruising goes on at an hour when, if your children are in the park at that hour, you have more to worry about than some gay sex. ---
**Author:** ![threemae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f9b8f/32.png) [@threemae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threemae)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/38 "2006-11-27T05:43:38Z")
[QUOTE=matt\_mcl] It’s also pretty weird when arguments about protecting the children are invoked in cases where the cruising goes on at an hour when, if your children are in the park at that hour, you have more to worry about than some gay sex. [/QUOTE] I’m sorry, but this attitude really bothers me. As a kid, I often remember going for a walk in the local park with my mom and sister after dark, often as late as 9:00 or 10:30 PM. It’s still a public park and should be available for public use. Allowing the park to be overrun by a nuisance such as “cottaging” is against the interests of the public. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/39 "2006-11-27T05:50:57Z")
[QUOTE=threemae] I’m sorry, but this attitude really bothers me. As a kid, I often remember going for a walk in the local park with my mom and sister after dark, often as late as 9:00 or 10:30 PM. It’s still a public park and should be available for public use. Allowing the park to be overrun by a nuisance such as “cottaging” is against the interests of the public. [/QUOTE] I’m talking 2:00 a.m. ---
**Author:** ![Stout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Stout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stout)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2006, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788/40 "2006-11-27T13:52:14Z")
[QUOTE=Evil Captor] Perhaps the problems is that straight females are not so prone to hang out in parks seeking anonymous sex? [/QUOTE] Yea, I could just imagine the crowds forming if they did. Now I’m not a homophobic kind of guy, but the sex in public parks really bothers me, be it straight or gay, and I shudder when I imagine what the park scene would look like with a bunch of straight women just hanging around looking for anonyous sex. I guess I better mention that I live a block from one of these parks, and regularly pass through that park and I tend to avoid the cruising area simply because the furtive atmosphere really creeps me out. It’s a big park, so avoiding that area isn’t a hardship, plus,that area of the park isn’t lit at night, and the novelty of walking into trees has long since worn off. boytypreanma, thanks for pointing out that L vs T only applies to private property, it is significant in the context of this discussion. matt\_mcl, no doubt climate plays a large part in the frequency of this type of activity, but livingout here on the wet coast, allows these guys to go all year. Sex in a Montreal park during the winter would be a real challenge. Time of day seems to have little to do with whether these guys are in the park or not. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anonymous-gay-sex-in-the-park-common/381788.md?page=3)