# Another "Anti-Gay" Crusader Falls Out Of The Closet **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 5, 2010, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349 "2010-05-05T00:14:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/261 "2010-05-07T17:08:07Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > And you were. > > The distinction between this discussion and the Clinton experience is that Clinton had a detailed definition of what constituted “sex,” for the purposes his his deposition, and he lied under that definition. Actually, the precise wording of the question used in his definition did not include receiving oral sex (though it did include _giving_ it). Receiving oral sex had actually been crossed out in the definition. Being the lawyer that he was, he saw the loophole and he took it it. No perjury. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/262 "2010-05-07T17:09:39Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Again, I endorse this statement. It’s adulterous in nature. It’s not adultery. It’s adultery. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/263 "2010-05-07T17:09:50Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > It’s less than full fledged adultery but more like **Adultery Helper** perhaps- the seasonings are all there but the meat’s not in the pot just yet. What aisle is that on in the supermarket? ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/264 "2010-05-07T17:13:00Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > What aisle is that on in the supermarket? Depends on the grocery store, but it’s usually between the Kleenex and the home pregnancy tests. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/265 "2010-05-07T17:13:04Z")
Why is a blow job sex/adultery but not a hand job? What is the substantive difference there? It sounds completely arbitrary to me. I can tell you this, if I was to get a handjob from another woman, my wife would call it adultery and my marriage would be over. ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/266 "2010-05-07T17:13:20Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > “To have sex” is an imprecise expression whose specific meaning depends largely on context. Clearly, when people in this thread are saying things like “Rekers claimed he didn’t have sex with his rentboy, but it turns out he did”, they aren’t making a specific claim about Rekers’ engaging in penetrative versus non-penetrative sex; they’re just making the point that Rekers was lying about the sexual nature of the relationship. > > When you come into that conversation with the observation that you think the two “didn’t have sex”, without clarifying that you mean specifically penetrative sex, you aren’t making any useful point, you’re just confusing the issue with pointless nitpicking. This is the most sensible thing anyone has said in two pages. At the same time, I do agree that Rekers probably has a habit of using legalism to participate in Gay Sexual Behavior\* (hereinafter “GSB”), while deluding himself that he is not gay, and is not participating in “gay sex.” \*Including but not limited to watching gay porn or watching men undress and/or masturbate and thereby experiencing sexual arousal and/or gratification, receiving massages from men while one or both participants are nude, giving and/or receiving manual genital stimulation with another man, engaging in penetrative or receptive oral sex with a man, and engaging in penetrative or receptive anal sex with a man. There, was I specific enough? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/267 "2010-05-07T17:15:24Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Why is a blow job adultery but not a hand job? What is the substantive difference there? It sounds completely arbitrary to me. Orificial insertion. [QUOTE=Diogenes the Cynic] I can tell you this, if I was to get a handjob from another woman, my wife would call it adultery and my marriage would be over. [/QUOTE] What if your wife found out you were having cybersex or masturbating to porn twice daily- would that be adultery? What about a French kiss with another person? None of these would be defined as actual sex but would probably upset her quite a bit also. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/268 "2010-05-07T17:18:18Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Orificial insertion. This is significant how? How is it substantively different from a handjob? > [@](#): > > What if your wife found out you were having cybersex or masturbating to porn twice daily- would that be adultery? What about a French kiss with another person? Cybersex, yes. Kissing yes. Jerking off to porn does not involve another person, so no. ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/269 "2010-05-07T17:34:42Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Again, I endorse this statement. It’s adulterous in nature. It’s not adultery. So I take it you wouldn’t mind if I borrow your wife for handjobs and assorted seminal discharges not involving penetration? Lemme me know when you’re in town. Kewl. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/270 "2010-05-07T17:45:21Z")
So lesbians, who for political reasons, eschew penetration (people do weird things, this is one of them) don’t have sex? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/271 "2010-05-07T17:46:59Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Orificial insertion. Band name! ---
**Author:** ![waterj2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/858c86/32.png) [@waterj2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/waterj2)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/272 "2010-05-07T18:12:44Z")
Joe Jervis of Joe.My.God managed to get the escort, Jo-Vanni Roman, to answer some questions in a [phone interview](http://joemygod.blogspot.com/2010/05/my-interview-with-jo-vanni-roman.html). I love the part at the end where he says, “Well, I do have to get up early for an interview. You know that guy, the gay reporter on TV?” He’ll be interviewed for Anderson Cooper’s show tomorrow. I guess he’s getting the hang of outing people. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/273 "2010-05-07T18:13:12Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Orificial insertion. So, if he sucked on Reker’s fingers during the massage: sex or no sex? ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/274 "2010-05-07T18:17:29Z")
My personal definition of sex: activities that are directly intended to lead to orgasm, whether that is actually reached or not. Handjob? Yes. Kissing? No, but possibly adulterous. Oral? Hells yeah. And if I were married to somebody who got a handjob from anybody else, male or female, that marriage would be _over_. Because that’s sex in my book. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/275 "2010-05-07T18:21:31Z")
> [@whiterabbit](#): > > My personal definition of sex: activities that are directly intended to lead to orgasm, whether that is actually reached or not. Handjob? Yes. Kissing? No, but possibly adulterous. Oral? Hells yeah. This. And that includes phone/cyber sex and frottage. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/276 "2010-05-07T18:27:36Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > What aisle is that on in the supermarket? It’s a red light special. > [@waterj2](#): > > I love the part at the end where he says, “Well, I do have to get up early for an interview. You know that guy, the gay reporter on TV?” He’ll be interviewed for Anderson Cooper’s show tomorrow. I guess he’s getting the hang of outing people. Outing Anderson Closet is like outing Ricky Martin. We all know, we’re just being polite and not telling _him_ that we know. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/277 "2010-05-07T18:31:55Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > So, if he sucked on Reker’s fingers during the massage: sex or no sex? Earlier I had specified penile-orificial insertion. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/278 "2010-05-07T18:33:19Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Outing Anderson Closet is like outing Ricky Martin. We all know, we’re just being polite and not telling _him_ that we know. I wonder if it makes him nervous when he does gay themed stories- especially those that deal with being outed in the media. True, he’s not a homophobe, and he’s not really closeted (i.e. he doesn’t deny being gay, he just doesn’t speak about his private life) but it still has to be a tad uncomfortable. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/279 "2010-05-07T18:35:54Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > > [@Kimstu](#): > > > > “To have sex” is an imprecise expression whose specific meaning depends largely on context. > > Agreed. Which is why I said: > > > [@Bricker](#): > > > > Actually, based on that conversation, it sounds to me like they didn’t have sex. I guess you meant to imply something like “they apparently didn’t have what I would call sex”, but you didn’t express it very clearly. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2010, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349/280 "2010-05-07T18:39:51Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Why is a blow job sex/adultery but not a hand job? What is the substantive difference there? It sounds completely arbitrary to me. > > I can tell you this, if I was to get a handjob from another woman, my wife would call it adultery and my marriage would be over. My wife wouldn’t call it adultery, but my marriage would be over. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-anti-gay-crusader-falls-out-of-the-closet/538349.md?page=15)